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Friday, November 6, 2009

Literacy: Books on Tape/CD

Here is our latest guest post from Susanne. Thanks Susanne!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am huge advocate for allowing children to listen to books on tape and CD. There are many benefits that arise from allowing your children to enjoy a book on tape.

Benefits:
  • Exposed to vocabulary that is not regularly used at home or at school.
  • Are able to hear the intonation and dramatization of stories. This helps children to understand how one should read with expression. Reading with expression helps children to build meaning and comprehension while reading.
  • For older children who struggle to read, books on tape open a door to reading that allows them to develop vocabulary at or above their level.
  • If listening to a book on tape is accompanied with the actual book, children can follow along. This allows them to read words they cannot read on their own. It also allows your child independence to interact with a story without an adult.
  • It helps them to develop good listening skills- essential for later success in school.

When are good times to use a book on tape/ CD?

  • In the car: Your children are captive at this time. You can all listen to the book on tape together. Occasionally stop the tape and ask them questions about what they have heard. This creates good discussion and helps them to develop great reading skills for later in life.
  • During quite time/ structure learning time: You can rent books at the library in the children’s section that come with a book. You can let your pre-schooler listen and follow along on the tape. Than afterwards, have them draw a picture in a journal about what they read. If they can write, you can always have them write something they liked in the story. You can also have them dictate to you what they like or a description about their picture if they cannot write yet.
  • Before Bed: Children are most vulnerable at night. They are most often more willing to let their defenses down and talk. As a family you could listen to a part of book on take. Than have a family discussion about what you just heard. If the parent shows interest in the book, your child will learn to show interest and enter into a discussion too.

Questions to ask your child during and after listening to a book on tape/ CD

  • Predictions- before listening to the story or pause the tape and ask, “what do you think will happen next in the story” or “what do you think will happen in this story..” Make sure you model and show them how to make predictions yourself so they understand what you are asking them to do.
  • Connections- before or after reading the story, ask them if the story reminded them of anything? For instance, if the story had a dog, you could say, “the dog in the story reminded me of how our dog Max always chases cats.” Or if the story was about a boy who went to a baseball game, you could discuss the time your family went to the baseball game and how it was similar and different.
  • Why- you can ask your children why questions. For instance you could ask a question such as, “Why do you think Henry lied to his mom?” This brings up some good discussion!
  • Did you like it?- Ask your child if he or she liked the story. Make sure to have them explain why they liked it. They should use at least one example to support their reason. For instance, “I liked this story because I like ponies” (ponies were in the story). Or, “I liked the story because the kids get to go the beach. I liked it when we went to the beach this summer.”
  • Summarize- at the end of the story have your child tell you what the story was about. There should be a beginning, a middle, and an end to the retell of the story.

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Bob Books

One day, a blog reader enthusiastically commented about her use of Bob Books. She had read about them on a preschooling blog I recommended, and she had great success with them.

Well, I had never noticed the discussion of Bob books on the blog, but this reader had me sold! I ordered the first set immediately. Brayden and I love them!

Bob Books are designed to help children learn to read. They are sold in sets. Each set has books that are slowly graduated. They introduce reading sounds progressively. They are simple and consistent.

Each book has a picture dictionary at the beginning that introduces the new sound(s) in that book. There are only five sight words in set one.

Brayden is now reading on his own. It is something he was attempting before we got the Bob Books, but he is really good at it now. I intend to purchase all of the sets in the Bob Books series.

I thought I would pass along the info!



or a link to all Bob Books on Amazon.

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Thursday, November 5, 2009

Parenting The Strong-Willed Child...What is "Strong-Willed"?

After reading my review of Parenting the Strong-Willed Child by Forehand and Long, you might be wondering what exactly constitutes "strong-willed." The strong-willed child is independent, assertive, confident, determined, persistent, outgoing, and questioning (pages 8-9). Most of these things might sound good to you. They actually sound like good qualities to me.

Then can be good qualities. Forehand and Long point out that they want to help parents nurture the positive sides of these qualities while minimizing the impact of the negative sides of these qualities. If you stop and think about it, you can easily see how these qualities could lead to some conflict between a 2 year old and the parent. Left unchecked, these qualities can become quite the nightmare by age 6.

There is debate in the academic world about nature vs. nurture. I think that most parents who follow Babywise or Baby Whisperer believe that nurture has an impact on the development of the child (if not, why are you doing it?). So yes, there are things you can do to help your strong-willed child magnify the positive sides of being strong-willed and minimize the negative sides.

As I stated in my previous post about this book, the skills this book teaches should be used by all parents of all children, no matter how strong-willed your child is (page 45). But these skills were "originally developed and shown to be clinically effective with strong-willed children who have high rates of non-compliance and other disruptive behaviors" (page 46).

Here are some problem behaviors Forehand and Long pinpoint as problems of strong-willed children (46-47):

  • Disobedient
  • Temper Tantrums
  • Demands Attention
  • Stubborn
  • Screams
  • Argues
  • Threatens Others
  • Shows off
  • Irritable
  • Swears
  • Aggressive
  • Blames Others
  • Sassy
  • Destructive
  • Dishonest
  • Negative
  • Steals

This book has a test for you to administer to your child to see if your child is strong-willed (or to what magnitude your child is strong-willed). They say that your child will comply less often in the test as you give more directions, you need to record if your child complies within 5 seconds, the parent needs to not do or say anything other than what the test instructs, and you want 60% compliance (18 out of 30).

I thought it would be fun to do the test with Brayden (almost 4.5 years old). He complied for 28 out of the 30 instructions. With the last two, he finally started questioning why he needed to do what I told him to. He did comply, but not within 5 seconds. I was obviously pleased with the results since the book said my goal was 18 of 30!

Now you have an idea if your child is "strong-willed" or not. I think that parents of "strong-willed" children probably know it, but this can help the ones who might not be sure. If you are having any difficulty with your kids (in other words, if you have kids), I really think this book can provide you with some excellent parenting tools to improve obedience levels.




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Wednesday, November 4, 2009

What was/is baby's approximate optimal waketime length for 10-11 months? (includes feeding time)

Results:

  • 75-90 minutes: 4 votes (2%)
  • 1.5-2 hours 18 votes (9%)
  • 2-2.5 hours 78 votes (38%)
  • 2.5-3 hours 41 votes (20%)
  • 3-3.5 hours 44 votes (21%)
  • 3.5 hours or more 22 votes (11%)

Total of 207 votes

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  • poll results
  • optimal waketime

    Reminder: You can leave comments on poll results posts if you would like to add to the poll after it has closed. This would be helpful for those who have more than one child, those whose children have reached certain ages after a poll closed, and those who didn't visit the blog while that poll was open. To find closed polls, click on the poll results link above.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Baby Summary: Week 31

This week was very smooth. I am glad we got over the developmental leap before the time change! She turned 7 months old this week! I am in denial. I still think of her as a 6 month old. She can't be 7 months old. Maybe next month ;)

NURSING
Nursing is still going well with no problems.

PUMPING
So I kept my milk that I pumped (instead of the dreamfeed) in the fridge for a couple of days and then tried to feed it to McKenna in a bottle. We, um, haven't done a bottle for a few weeks, so she was playing around with it and I assumed she just wasn't wanting the bottle. Then she started making a grossed out face. So I tasted the milk. It was sour! I had read on kellymom.com that milk stays good in the fridge for 8 days. Obviously not mine! I will have to freeze it immediately after I pump I guess.

SLEEPING
She slept really well this week except for one night. Early in the week, she woke up at 11:10 PM just screaming. I went to her and she kept crying. She almost seemed scared. I have read that bad dreams can start around 6 months, but I have also read it doesn't start until well after one year, and even that bad dreams won't come until two years. There wasn't anything physically wrong with her. It took about 30 minutes of me cuddling and rocking her for her to snap back to happy McKenna. Then she starting cooing and smiling at me, so I put her back to bed and she was just fine.

ROLLING DISRUPTIONS
Remember how a few weeks ago I said we wouldn't be having more rolling disruptions? I was asking for it! She had a few times of disruptions on her tummy, but also several times when I woke her up on her tummy. After observing, I have determined that she is now as long as the crib is wide, so she gets kind of stuck on her tummy between the slats and gets upset. Hopefully she will figure out how to avoid or get out of that situation soon :)

SOLIDS
I didn't start any new solid foods this week. The diaper rash went away and I am just assuming it was avocado. I won't be giving it to her again until she is at least 12 months old.

FINGER FOODS
She is loving finger foods. She had a biter biscuit and loved it. She ate over half of it, which neither Brayden or Kaitlyn did until they were much older. They just sucked on it. She had one rice puff this week and chewed it up like a champ!

COLD
McKenna has a cold. She is still sleeping just as well. She actually needs a bit shorter of a waketime length.

DISRUPTIONS
This was a busy week with lots of activities with Halloween approaching. We had family parties, church parties, and friend get-togethers. She was great.

OUR SCHEDULE
Things moving toward the time change time faster. By the end of the week, we only had 15 minutes to go for morning time and were on with the rest of the day. So this is on old time (pre-time change) hours, but what it will be when the time changes. Yes, that is probably confusing. So we were starting our day at 8:45, which will be 7:45 when the time changes.

8:45 AM--wake, nurse, eat (prunes or peaches and oatmeal)
10:00 AM--nap
1:00 PM--wake, nurse, eat (green veggie and applesauce)
2:30 PM--nap
5:00 PM--wake, nurse eat (yellow veggie and bananas or pears)
6:30 PM--nap
8:30 PM--wake, nurse, PJs, story, bed

HELPFUL BOOKS/WEBSITES


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Monday, November 2, 2009

Chores

Exactly how you do chores in your family is up to you and your family. There is no one right or wrong way to go about it--it is not a moral activity. However you do it, just be sure you do it. "Family chores play a significant role in building loyalty, unity, and responsibility to your child" (On Becoming Preschoolwise page 182).

When can you start chores? I encourage you to let your child help you as soon as he is interested, which will likely be somewhere around 9-12 months old. Doesn't that mean chores take a lot more time? Doesn't that mean chores aren't done as well as you would like them to be? Yes, and yes. It definitely does. But the practice must come sometime. If you wait until your child is 5, there will still be a learning curve. It will still take time to get good at it, and by that age, she won't be so interested in helping anymore.

During Brayden's first year, we lived in a studio apartment type of a place. Because of that, I cleaned during waketime, never naptime. He saw lots of cleaning, and he really wanted to help. I let him. I have had "help" vacuuming for four years. And you know what? Now I get real help. I give him the vacuum and go do something else. When I come back, the room is vacuumed beyond my expectations and 100% to my satisfaction.

I know you can do it better and faster, but do you want to be doing it better and faster for the next 18 years? Probably not.

Because Brayden is such a good hard worker, I haven't ever implemented formal "chores." He helps when I am working and he helps when I ask. I clearly remember last fall. We were out raking leaves. I was pregnant with McKenna and very sick. After a short time, I sat down to rest because I was tired. Brayden didn't pause for a minute. He kept on raking. He only stopped when it was naptime, and right after nap, he went back out and helped my husband finish the job.
But I am now feeling the need for some formal chores on a daily basis. I want to teach him more order and routine to the chores we do each day. My hope is that it won't turn into a "chore" instead of something he enjoys. When I was growing up, I always loved reading. I literally read at least 30 books a month--usually closer to 60. When I entered honors English in middle school, we suddenly had the requirement to read a lot. Reading was less fun for me then. I don't want to do that to Brayden and his love of chores.

I have done some thinking about it. I am first trying out chore charts that I made on my computer. There is also a fun idea found in Preschoolwise using index cards. My husband and I decided we will try out the charts for two weeks and the cards for two weeks and see what works best for our family right now.
Here are samples of what we are doing. I want these to be things they do each day without me telling them to. I fully expect to have to help Kaitlyn along (she is 2.5), but I believe Brayden will do it without being asked. They will get to put a sticker on when each item is completed. Click on each image for a larger view.
You will notice on the monthly list of jobs, there is a "chore jar" category. On those days, the children will draw a chore that is written on a piece of paper out of a jar. They will then do the chore listed on it. Examples are help unload the dishwasher, rake, weed, shovel snow, sweep, dust base moldings, help make dinner, set the table, and help feed the dogs. They each have their own chore jar with jobs that are age appropriate.
DAILY CHORES BEFORE BED:
DAILY CHORES OVER THE MONTH: a note about chores, you want to give your child a good experience. Kaitlyn is literally terrified of the vacuum and has been since birth. On Saturdays when her job is to help vacuum, her job will be picking things off the floor so Brayden can vacuum.





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Friday, October 30, 2009

Best Toys for Toddler...2.5 and Up

We are approaching Christmas, so I thought I should try to finish these off so far as my kid's ages are. As a reminder, the following toys will be toys that are good for children around the age of 2.5 and older.

By age 2.5, your toddler and toys will be a very fun combination. Your toddler will really play with toys. Some (like my Kaitlyn) will be very imaginative with toys, even. Brayden didn't play very imaginatively with toys at this age, so don't worry if your child doesn't. Here are the toys I have added to my children's' toy box around this age:

  • Old Favorites: Yep, I start each post this way. Be sure to review past posts on this topic to find ideas that will work for your child. Children play with toys in different ways at different ages. By 2.5, your toddler will be pretty much outgrowing the "baby" toys. We are moving on to more "grown-up" toys now...lol. The LeapFrog Learn & Groove™ Musical Table is still well liked at this age. Most other baby toys, like the stacking rings, are rarely played with by my 2.5 years olds. But all of the items listed in the Best Toys for Toddler: 2 and Up are still well-loved by the 2.5 year old (I know, you hope so right!) -- the link opens in a new window. So in that, we have covered your cars, trucks, tractors, T-ball and other balls, lawnmowers, baby furniture, kitchen dishes and accessories, purses, hats, dress up clothes, dollhouse items...
  • Build on Favorites: You know the saying "Rome wasn't built in a day"? That means that you don't have to get everything immediately. If your child shows interest in train sets, you don't have to go buy a huge, elaborate train set with all of the best trains immediately. You can build up over time. Add trains at various gift-giving times over the years. So review the categories you child loves and build on those. It might be doll house furniture, kitchen accessories, little people, trucks, doll furniture...build it over time.
  • Train Sets: You might really want to give your 2 year old a train set...but it will likely be a few months before he can play with it without frustration. We gave Brayden his first train set at Christmas when he was 2.5. He did just fine with it. When Kaitlyn was two, she really started trying to play with Brayden and the train set, but she always got very frustrated. Her fine motor skills were not developed enough to play with it without pushing the trains off the track. Somewhere between 2-2.5, it became okay. We got Brayden the Thomas & Friends Wooden Railway - Water Tower Figure 8 Set. We prefer wooden sets. This set is a great value so far as Thomas stuff goes. However, we have since found lots of other wooden train sets that work just as well. My favorite is the Melissa & Doug Deluxe Wooden Railway Set . Take note of the differences in what you get. For $27 more (right now...the Melissa & Doug one is normally 120, but on sale on Amazon for 65), you basically have a complete set with Melissa & Doug. Plus, that company replaces lost and broken pieces for free. They don't look the exact same. When it comes to the tracks, it doesn't matter at all. The main noticeable differences are in the accessories (the buildings and trains). You can always slowly add Thomas buildings if you want to and Thomas trains. Brayden and Kaitlyn have so much fun building train tracks all around the room. It really works their creativity.
  • Board Games: This was the age Brayden was when I we got a whole bunch of board games for him. We did Let's Go Fishing, Candyland, and Chutes and Ladders initially. Chutes and Ladders wasn't a great one for a 2.5 year old. Not because of the skills required, but because the board is so chaotic! They need to be a little older to be able to keep track of where to go. We add at least one board game each Christmas (we love games). Hi Ho Cherrio is great. There are also fun games like Don't Break the Ice, Don't Spill the Beans, and Cooties. Board Games
  • Play Doh Sets: There are a lot of fun Play Doh sets available. Take note of your child's fine motor abilities when choosing a set. Some of them can be very frustrating for the child (and therefore mom). We have the Play-Doh: Fun Factory Super Set. This has been a good set. It has simple tools you can let the younger child use, and more difficult tools to break out when your child is older.
  • GeoMags: Your 2.5 year old won't be able to make lots of things on his own yet, but he will enjoy these. It is a fun way to teach shapes (read geometry). GeoMags
  • Blocks: There are lots of kinds of blocks. My kids have Melissa & Doug Deluxe 50-piece Wooden ABC/123 Blocks Set, which they have fun with. They will be getting the Melissa & Doug 100 Piece Wood Blocks Set for Christmas so they can build more things with it.
  • DVDs: I like to get my kids a DVD for Christmas that is in line with their interest. Last year, Kaitlyn got Elmo. I am not sure what she will get this year, yet.
  • Learning Activities: Kids love to learn. They love to be mentally challenged (as age appropriate). Getting them educational learning activities toys will be fun for them. See the blog label "learning" for more about these toys.
  • CDs: I also like to get more music to add to our children's music library.
  • Books: Books are always great gifts. Choose a book that has a topic along the lines of your child's interest. Also, look into prize winners and best sellers. There is a reason they are prize winners and best sellers.
  • Kitchen Accessories: You can continue to build up your toy kitchen accessories. I have talked about dishes and food, now how about pot holders, wash clothes, aprons...Your 2.5 year old will do more and more imaginative play as she grows.
  • Doctor Set: Along with the idea of dress up clothes, remember things like Doctor Sets. My two older kids love to play doctor. They like to pretend I am the patient (or each other) and check me out. This was one of my favorites when I was pregnant. I could lay on the floor and let them check me over, and we were having some play time together :) These sets are also valuable for role playing if your child is afraid of the doctor.
  • Sled: If you live where it snows, a Sled will be very fun. For more outdoor ideas for this age range, but summer types, see the 2 and up post, and the future 3 and up post.
  • Ponies: One of Kaitlyn's favorite things to play with right now is My Little Ponies. One of my favorite memories will long be coming home to find my dad (a very manly man) sitting on the floor playing ponies with Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn is very horse crazy and very imaginative. Ponies could be considered more of a figurine type of a toy, which is really better for older children. If your child is not into imaginative play, you might want to wait a bit longer before getting a pony. But you can always get one and see how it goes.
  • Power Wheels: We love garage sales. One day, we really lucked out. We found a like-new power-wheel for $10. The battery didn't work. My husband is fix-it guy, and just put a new battery in it. It has very much been worth that. It is a favorite toy. I highly recommend them. I would get a two seater so more than one child can ride at a time. They can be expensive. You might want to check classifieds (local, craigslist, ebay) or watch for a sale. Power Wheels.
  • Puzzles: I can't believe I forgot this in the original post. A few readers mentioned this. Kaitlyn recently got a new puzzle I wanted to point out because she just loves it. It is theMelissa & Doug Deluxe Latches Board . They also have a Melissa & Doug Deluxe Basic Skills Board that I like, but we have a doll that does the same thing so we don't have it.

Please share the toys your 2.5 year old loves/loved to play with!

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Thursday, October 29, 2009

Book Review: Parenting the Strong Willed Child

When I first started reading Parenting the Strong Willed Child by Forehand and Long, I thought it seemed like a good book. By the time I was done, I thought it was a great book. I highly recommend this book to anyone with a 2-6 year old child does not obey well. I think any parent can gain valuable insight from this book; I did. A great thing about this book is that it is a 5 week program that gives you step by step instructions to improve things with your child. This really is a how-to manual. Here is some of what the book includes:


  • Information on the Strong-Willed Child. This includes descriptions of what is a strong-willed child. It talks about what makes a child more strong-willed and what you can do about it. These include everything from parental conflict to use of punishment/rewards to modeling to television.
  • The Five Week Program. The book then has one chapter per week of the program. These are skills that should be used by all parents. This includes a test to do with your child to determine if he is strong-willed or not. The first week is practicing attending behaviors. This means you spend time with your child only describing what you child is doing, with no value judgements. The next chapter adds rewards. The next is on ignoring. Then we move on to giving directions. They then discuss the time out. They claim that their time out process is proven by research to work. This section then finishes up with how to integrate skills.
  • Creating a Positive Climate. This section discusses what you can do to improve things overall with your children. This includes having a more positive home, improving communication, developing more patience, managing stress, and building self-esteem.
  • Specific Problems. The final chapter discusses several common behaviors and what to do about them. These include tantrums, aggression, meal-time, dressing, car trips, bedtime, lying, and sibling rivalry.

This book has so much valuable information. It is definitely worth the read. I will do some reviewing of points, but if you have a strong-willed child, it will definitely need to be something you get and read yourself.

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Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Moving Tips

We have moved a few times in Brayden's lifetime. The first was when he was two weeks old. The next was when he was one year old. The last was when he was four years old. My friend, Kelli, also moved in the last few months. Here are our tips for making the move easier on yourself and the family. Please be sure to comment with your own tips if you have them!

DOWNSIZING
  • Plan Ahead. Know how much space you will have. We called ahead for actual room sizes, then taped off our rooms to get the dimensions of the space we would be moving into to make sure we could actually fit what we were bringing. (by Kelli)
  • Less Is Better. I would suggest bringing only what you think you absolutely need. Then eliminate 10% more. (by Kelli)
  • Sell What You Can. It costs so much to store furniture these days, that it is worth it to sell off unused furniture that you can part with. Local online classifieds like craigslist.com is good for this. (by Kelli)
  • Share Storage. We ended up getting a local storage locker to store a washer and dryer. The cheapest place we could find was $35 a month. We later found friends here who had extra room in there storage space. We now pay them $10 a month for a portion of theirs. It is a good arrangement all around. (by Kelli)
  • De-Junk: View the move as an opportunity to "de-junk" your stuff. We often hang on to things that we really will never use. I like to throw stuff away (or set aside for good will) as I pack. I also get rid of stuff as I unpack. Don't get rid of things you might need in the new place (that is just a waste of money!), but take advantage of this organizing opportunity. (by Val)

PACKING (by Val)

  • Start Early. I personally like to start packing quite early. Even when I was in college and moving a car full of stuff, I started a month early. I know that is a bit extreme...start early enough that you can really organize things as you go.
  • Organize By Room: When you are packing your boxes, group items by room. Do it by rooms the items will go in at the new house, not where they are in the current house. Why? It makes unpacking so much easier.
  • Label: Label your boxes according to room. You can just write which room it goes in. Some readers have said they assigned a color to each room and put a colored index card on each box. Do what works for you. I labeled which room it went in as well as what was in the box. Label all sides of the box. I put the room it went in on top and each side. I then put more details on the top or sides.
  • Pack a Suitcase: Pack a suitcase (or whatever) for each member of the family as though you were going on vacation for a few days. A vacation in a tent :). Pack as though there will be no amenities (but you will have electricity). Include toiletries, clothes, pillows, toys, books for bedtime, etc.
  • Pack Important Items Together: Something I did was pack bedding for each bed in a box together, then I marked it in a very noticeable way. I knew we would need all of that for that night. Make it so noticeable that you can find it in a sea of boxes.
  • Pack Monitors In Purse: or somewhere else you can't lose it. Our first night in our new house, I easily found Kaitlyn's monitor and Brayden's monitor. I could not, however, find McKenna's monitor anywhere! I had just packed them a few hours before. Her monitors were some of the very last things I packed. I didn't find them for days. Luckily, I just used Brayden's for her. He is old enough to be able to come to us if there is a problem. If I had to do it over again, I would put the monitors in my purse and keep in on my person.
  • Pack Yourself: When we moved when Brayden was one, my husband's company paid for a moving company to pack and move us. While it was nice to have them do all the packing, and they packed everything in one day, it was really a pain to unpack. I don't think it was worth it for me. I prefer packing my things in logical (logical to me) groupings. Movers are just putting everything in boxes as fast as they can. No worries to them if the kitchen spoons are mixed in with the toilet paper. I am sure there are people out there who prefer movers. Decide what will work best for you and do that.
  • Get Free Boxes: Most grocery stores or fast food chains will give you their boxes for free. We got all of our boxes from our local Wendy's. Their boxes were very sturdy and strong.
  • Send the Children Away: If you can, have the kids visit grandma or a friend so you can get some packing done without them distracting. But do let them help with their own rooms.

PREPPING CHILDREN (by Val)

  • Talk About The Move: Tell your children you are moving. Talk about what you will take and what you won't take. At first, Brayden thought we were going to leave all of our stuff in the old house (even his toys). He was surprisingly fine with that, but very excited to learn he could take his toys with him.
  • Read Books: It might be helpful to read books about moving to your child.
  • Let Them Help: Let your children help pack, especially their own stuff.
  • Visit the New House/Look at Pictures: Since we didn't move far, we were able to visit our new house often. We would go there and show them around the house and show them their new rooms. If you can't do that, try to get pictures of the new house to show your children.
  • Have Open Communication: Talk with your children about the things and people they will miss. Tell them what will be different. Tell them what will be good. Ask what they like about the new house. Give them something positive to look forward to, but don't dismiss feelings of loss for leaving the old house.
  • Walk Through the Empty House: After a few days in our new house, Kaitlyn (2) started requesting we "go home." I decided she needed to see the old house so she could feel some closure. We went over and visited it all empty. We looked in every room and saw that it wasn't our home anymore. After that, she was totally fine with the new house. If you are moving far away, I highly recommend you do a walk through with your children before you leave your house.

TRAVEL

  • Plan Ahead: We had friends who did not book hotels and plan stops in advance, and ended up spending at least one night in a car. (by Kelli)
  • Make an Itinerary: After we mapped a route and booked hotels, we printed off an itinerary for both vehicles with local maps and information as well as contact info for truck return and landlord arrangements when we arrived. (by Kelli)
  • Bring Help: My husband drove the moving truck, and my mom did most of the driving in our car so I could devote my energies to entertaining our two boys. We would not have made it without her. (by Kelli)
  • Fly if Needed: I had a friend who flew to their new home with her 14 month old while her husband drove the moving van. The flight was much shorter and easier on her baby. (by Val)

POST-MOVE (by Val)
  • Unpack Fast: Unpack your children's things quickly. When Kaitlyn started asking to go home, I thought about things from her perspective. Most of her toys were boxed up and she was living in a new house full of boxes. How fun is that for a two year old? Brayden (4) was fine with things being unsettled, but he has always been very flexible with change like that. I know it is a big job (believe me). I also know that a room like the kitchen is very important to get done quickly. But be sure to put the kids' rooms high on the priority list.
  • Send the Children Away: One option is to have the kids visit grandma or a friend for a day or two so you can really focus on packing and get things as settled as possible before they come to their new house.
  • Maintain Routine: Try your best to keep the routine the same for your children. Everything around them has been uprooted. Maintaining your routine will help them have something familiar to hold to.
  • Have Patience: Over the course of Kaitlyn's life, she has literally never protested independent playtime. Our first day in our new house, she did independent play just fine. Day two...she cried. I had her come out of independent play and didn't try again for a week. I wanted to be sure she was emotionally secure before trying it again. I used her extra time with me as an opportunity to finally hit potty training again (I had stopped when McKenna was born since she was not able to pull her pants down by herself at the time). We reintroduced it slowly, and she now does it as usual.

There are our tips. Please share your tips! I am sure there are many great ones out there.

RELATED BLOG LABELS:

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

What Do You Think of the Label Cloud?

Be honest. I just changed labels to the cloud instead of the list. Do you like it better, worse, undecided? I thought it might be nice to not have to scroll so much, but I don't want to make it harder to find what you are looking for. So let me know what you think.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Later that day...

Thanks everyone! I thought that it looked "cuter," but I am 100% a form-follows-function sort of person, so if it makes it harder, I will change it!

Baby Summary: Week 30

NURSING
Nursing is still going well.

Since I dropped the dreamfeed, I pump before I go to bed to store up milk. Yes, that is annoying :). But I don't think it will be something I regret ever.

SLEEPING
Sleeping is going well. She is sleeping through the night and napping well. Sometimes she woke up mid-nap, but after talking to herself for a while (about 15 minutes), she went back to sleep.

SOLIDS
We didn't start any new foods this week. She started to get a little rash, and I am wondering if it is because of Avocado. It just seems odd to me that she could be allergic to it, but I think she might be. I have taken her off of it to see if the rash stops returning. It was there, gone, there, and now gone. I am using lots of of Butt Paste at every diaper change :)

FINGER FOODS
I did start a finger food. I just did a wagon wheel (by Gerber). It is basically a flavored toy for her :)

DROPPING THE THIRD NAP
I don't know if McKenna was really dropping her third nap or not. She was doing about a one hour nap every other day (two hour the other days), but the last few days she is still asleep after two hours. I am wondering if the disrupted third nap was due to her developmental leap rather than being ready to drop the third nap.

OUR SCHEDULE
I am continuing to move things back slowly before the time change, but I can't change her much more than she is since it would conflict with the other children too much. I am also going to stop posting how much of each food she eats. I think too many people are worrying over it :):

8:20--wake, nurse, eat (prunes or peaches and oatmeal)
9:30--nap
12:20--wake, nurse, eat (green veggie and applesauce. I was also doing avocado here, but have since stopped it. I will start again if the rash is attributed to something else)
2:00--nap
4:30--wake, nurse, eat (orange/yellow veggie, bananas or pears)
6:00--nap
7:50--wake, nurse, pjs, story, bed

FAVORITE BOOKS
McKenna's favorite books right now are pretty much any book. But she does especially love
Touch and Feel Books.

FAVORITE TOYS
McKenna has a few favorite toys. One group is all of these toys in this Sassy Gift Set .


HELPFUL BOOKS/WEBSITES


RELATED POSTS/BLOG LABELS

Monday, October 26, 2009

Reader Twins Questions

  • Tracy said...
    Hi Valerie! I have twin daughters that are 5 weeks old. We are really struggling with the evening nap and getting back to sleep after the middle of the night feeding. If they take the evening nap, then they seem to really struggle with getting back to sleep after the middle of the night feedings. If they cry through the evening nap and never fall asleep, then middle of the night feedings go much better. Is it possible that they are getting too much sleep in the evening and therefore can't sleep as well at night? Any suggestions? Even more, I'm GREATLY struggling with the lack of time I get with the girls on the Babywise schedule. I feed my first daughter, set her down for wake time, feed the second and then it's time to put my first baby to sleep. I feel like I can never hold her unless I'm nursing her! I hate it!!! Would I be messing up all my hard work if I held them in my arms during the evening nap or another time of day? I want to enjoy my precious babies and feel like I can't because I'm working so hard to feed, watch every cue and hurry to get them back down. I know having twins puts me in a different category, but there has to be a happy medium with Babywise or I feel like I won't ever be able to hold my babies, let alone my husband who is gone all day. I'm really missing them and need some encouragement! Maybe it's just my mommy guilt and lack of sleep, but I feel like I'm missing the joy of my precious babies while they are so young. I welcome your thoughts as soon as possible! Thanks so much!!
    September 29, 2008 7:24 PM
    Plowmanators said...
    Tracy, you could try a shorter nap in the evening (45 min or one hour). You could try to keep them up, but 5 weeks seems young for that to me. However, you are the mom! I am not sure about holding them for a nap each day. Some babies might be able to handle that. My daughter might have. My son definitely wouldn't have. If you do decide to do it, understand it can't last very long. They won't sleep very well in your arms.I understand your frustration. All moms have it, so with two you wouldn't be able to spend as much time with each. See this post for more on that: Spending Time with Baby/Child : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/08/speding-time-with-babychild.html
    October 1, 2008 4:11 PM
  • MomWithaDoubleBlessing said...
    Good morning! First of all, thanks for the abundant advice all over this blog. I too reference it a lot for ideas to troubleshoot!I am a first time mom of 10wk (corrected age is 8 weeks) twin boys. My hands are full, and the boys really are sweethearts.We work really hard to keep them on the same schedule (every 3 hours). They are doing really well at sleep training and, unless over-stimulated, can get themselves to settle within 10 minutes most times! Sometimes with no crying at all. (Still working on transitions, but they get it most of the time)My question is regarding night feedings. I'm feeling sad because both of them have slept up to 8 hours a couple times. But in the last week and a bit (as life has gone back to normal since the holidays), both have digressed back to 4 and 5 hours. One of them even woke twice in the night a couple nights ago! I'm trying to think "What have I done differently?!" Is it normal to progress and then digress?Their schedule is:7:30am10:30am1:30pm4:00pm7:00pmDF 9:30-10pmI don't expect them to make it all the way through to the 7:30 feed yet, because that would be 10 hours. I've considered adding another feed into the day (to make it 7 in the day), but trying to get them to go every 2 and 1/2 hours is crazy because they just aren't hungry enough!I breastfeed and supplement, alternating who gets what at each feed. I get them to nurse 20-30 minutes and their bottles are now up to 6oz each, which they usually can finish.When they wake in the night, they always take a full feed, and they eat a full meal at the first meal too, so is this simply an issue of waiting for them to mature? Thanks for your input. I just don't want to miss something and ruin our sleep opportunities!
    January 12, 2009 9:37 AM
    Plowmanators said...
    MomwithaDoubleBlessing,It is normal to go "digress" like that, especially during a growth spurt.My guess it is a growth spurt. They are at the right age for it. Since they are eating well in the night and morning, I definitely wouldn't stop feeding them in the night yet.
    January 17, 2009 4:34 PM
  • Tracy said...
    We were doing SO well on our sleep-training and have had to start over a bit thanks to the holidays. Oh well...I have a question for you and am not sure where to post it. We have our twins on a very good schedule. They are eating every 3 to 3-1/2 hours, activity time, napping very well. They go down at night between 7:30-8pm like champs after a slightly larger bedtime bottle. They have dropped the late night feeding...we found they just didn't want to wake up to eat. BUT, they are still waking up at 2am and then again at 5am like clockwork. Sometimes we can get them to sleep through their 5am, but never the 2am. I've come to accept that our twosome just need to eat after 6 hours (they are measuring in the 97th percentile, so maybe they need the calories!) Would you try to reinstitute the 10pm feeding to get them to sleep until 4am? Or should we just power through and hope that the introduction of solid food naturally solves some of our problems? What are your thoughts? Should I thank my lucky stars that it's so easy with twins? We are very tired, but I know it could be worse.
    January 6, 2009 1:34 PM
    Plowmanators said...
    Tracy, Since the 10 PM feeding was dropped, the night feedings will stick around longer than they would otherwise. I would try to get that 10 PM feeding back in and see if they will eat. Solids take a while before they affect sleeping because it takes them time to actually be able to take in enough food to impact calories for the day. See the blog lable "dreamfeed" for more information on that 10 PM feeding.
    January 10, 2009 1:45 PM

Reader Questions on Going Out

  • jencwu said...
    Sorry, another question--I told you in my first post that I had tons! There are times when we have to go somewhere part way through Noah's nap, or when we come home part way through a nap. I am always unsure as to what would be the best for his sleep--if I know we'll be leaving an hour into his nap, say, should I put him down for his nap in his car seat so I don't have to wake him to do that in an hour? And the reverse, if we come home and he's been sleeping for an hour, and we have an hour left, do I leave him in his car seat or risk waking him up by transfering him to his crib?
    August 22, 2008 3:08 PM
    Plowmanators said...
    jencwu, for sure I would leave him in the carseat when you get home, unless he is one of the few babies who will transfer well. Most won't. If he will fall asleep in his carseat, that can be a good idea. My kids wouldn't do that, so I always put them down but new that was going to be a short nap that day.
    August 28, 2008 7:57 AM

Feeding the Rainbow

I am sure you have heard that you should eat all the colors of the rainbow when it comes to fruits and vegetables. Different colored produce contains different nutrients. When you eat a variety, you get a variety of vitamins, minerals, and phytonutrients (stuff like beta-carotene).

I have often heard this. This is the reason I feed a green veggie at lunch every day and a yellow veggie at dinner. That way I make sure green and yellow are covered each day. I then apply a color of fruit to each meal.

There have been some things I have wondered about. Take apples. The skin is red (or green), but the flesh is yellow/white. So what color am I eating? (the answer is red--if the apple is red).

Here is a list of the colors of the rainbow and the fruits and veggies you, your spouse, your children, and your baby can eat. NOTE: not all of the foods listed below are safe for babies. Please be sure to feed only age-appropriate foods to infants and toddlers.

RED
Many red foods may help reduce the risk of some cancers. Many red foods also contain antioxidants that help prevent cell damage and help keep your heart healthy.

Fruits
  • Apples (red apples).
  • Cherries
  • Strawberries
  • Red grapes
  • Cranberries
  • Pink grapefruit
  • Pomegranates
  • Raspberries
  • Watermelon

Vegetables

  • Beets
  • Red cabbage
  • Red peppers
  • Red potatoes (I didn't know this!)
  • Radishes
  • Rhubarb (it is a vegetable. Look it up)
  • Tomatoes (I know it is technically a fruit...but I like it better here...see this article. And a side note, it is the state vegetable of New Jersey and the state fruit of Ohio. Also, I read that the benefits of tomatoes are better when they are cooked and served with some fat, like in spaghetti sauce).

ORANGE & Yellow
Orange produce contains vitamin A, which is good for your eyes. Orange produce can reduce the risk of cancer and heart disease. It is also supposed to boost the immune system. But take note that citrus foods like oranges are not a good source of vitamin A, though they do provide vitamin C folate and a B vitamin.

Fruits

  • Peaches
  • Apricots
  • Nectarines
  • Yellow apples
  • Cantaloupe
  • Grapefruit
  • Lemons
  • Oranges
  • Tangerines
  • Mangoes
  • Papayas
  • Pineapples
  • Yellow watermelon
  • Pears (although I have also read they are white, not orange/yellow)

Vegetables

  • Carrots
  • Squash (butternut, winter, yellow summer)
  • Pumpkins
  • Sweet Potatoes
  • Corn
  • Yellow peppers
  • Rutabagas
  • Yellow tomatoes
GREEN
Some green foods help to reduce the risk of cataracts and age-related macular degeneration in the eyes. Others help protect against cancer. Others contain folate, which reduces the risk of birth defects.

Fruits
  • Green apples
  • Avocado
  • Green grapes
  • Honeydew
  • Kiwi
  • Limes
Vegetables
  • Artichokes
  • Asparagus
  • Green beans
  • Broccoli
  • Brussels sprouts
  • Green cabbage
  • Cucumbers (another controversial one. I use the same reasoning to have it as veggie as I do tomatoes).
  • Lettuce
  • Spinach
  • Green onions
  • Peas
  • Green peppers
  • Zucchini

BLUE & PURPLE
These foods contain antioxidants that protect cells from damage. They may reduce the risk of cancer, stroke, and heart disease.

Fruits

  • Blackberries
  • Blueberries
  • Prunes
  • Plums
  • Figs
  • Juneberries
  • Raisins
  • Purple grapes

Vegetables

  • Eggplant (technically a fruit, but used as a veggie, so I list it here)

WHITE
These white foods may help lower blood pressure. They also may help reduce the risk of stomach cancer and heart disease. Some are also a good source of potassium.

Fruits

  • Bananas
  • Pears (yellow or white? I have read both)
  • Ginger

Vegetables

  • Cauliflower
  • Garlic
  • Mushrooms (I know it is a fungus, but it fits best with veggies)
  • Potatoes
  • Turnips
  • Parsnips

There you have it. There are more out there, especially in different countries. This list is by no means all-inclusive.

More more extensive information on what each food does for the body, see the book Super Baby Food.

For calculations on how many fruits and vegetables you and yours need, see this website (for ages two and up).

RELATED BLOG LABELS

Friday, October 23, 2009

Overcoming the Picky Eater

Is your baby a picky eater? Are there foods she doesn't like? Is there a food she used to like but suddenly doesn't? I have a couple of tried and true ideas for you to try out.

MIX WITH CEREAL
When McKenna first tried peaches, she hated them. This was nothing new for me. Brayden hated them. Kaitlyn hated them. With both Brayden and Kaitlyn, I basically just didn't feed peaches to them very often. Not so with McKenna!

I think my motivation was that I had lots of free peaches from my husband's grandparents. I didn't want to let them go to waste! So I put the effort into getting her to like it.

I started by mixing the peaches with some oatmeal. I did only one tablespoon of peaches mixed with 2-3 T of cereal. At first, she wasn't so sure about it. Over time, she came to like the mixture.

After 3-4 weeks of doing this, I tried giving her peaches plain. She liked them! She just needed time to get used to the taste. I still mix her peaches with her oatmeal each morning, but I do 2-4 T mixed with 3-4 T of oatmeal. I also do this for my own convenience rather than needing to get her to like peaches.

FEED IT EVERY DAY
Huh? My kid hates it and you want me to feed it to her every day? Yes. Yes I do.

When McKenna first tried squash, she loved it. This surprised me since I, myself, do not find squash all that appealing. After about a month of loving it, she suddenly decided she hated it. She would clamp her mouth shut after a few bites.

Again, I had free squash to use. I didn't want the bags of baby ice cube squash to go to waste. I knew I would be hesitant to feed it to her if she didn't like it because I didn't want her to go hungry. I feed orange veggies at dinner and didn't want her to be hungry in the night because she didn't eat her squash.

I normally rotate each night. One night is squash. The next is sweet potatoes. The next carrots. But I decided I needed to mix it up. I decided to feed her 2 T each night. I would then follow up with either sweet potatoes or carrots (alternating).

For the first few nights, she gagged and made the disgusted face. She would barely eat 2 T. By the end of the first week, she would eat the 2 T without complaint. I then increased the amount to 4 T. She is currently eating 4 T each night without complaint. I think she is ready to go back onto her normal rotation.

CONCLUSION
These are the two things that have worked really well with McKenna. For more ideas, see Picky Eaters.