BENEFITS
There are so many benefits. Imagine going out of town or to visit a friend or family and you can just easily put your baby in bed for naps and nighttime. CIO is also a good step toward developing self-control, which I think is kind of the bigger picture of the BW method down the road. There is so much you are going to want to teach your child, and a person who has control over their appetites and temper and impulses is going to have an easier time getting through life. Your child will get more sleep. You will get more sleep. You will have more time to do anything from the dishes to hobbies you enjoy. Mentally and physically, it benefits the whole family.
WHAT AGE?
The answer to this depends on you.
- Start when you think your baby is ready for it. Not when you think they won't cry at all (that day won't come), but when you think they were ready. You will know. I sensed Brayden was ready at 3 weeks, but I wasn't ready. This brings me to my second point.
- Start when you are ready. You need to be committed and ready to endure crying. It isn't easy. But you need to let your baby CIO. If you can't, don't do it.
- Don't start if your baby is sick, don't start if your baby is teething, don't start if you are moving, don't start if you are about to travel....etc.
- Be aware that it won't get easier as your baby gets older. Your baby will start to be able to wiggle around the crib, potentially getting him/herself stuck in a corner. Your baby will eventually be able to sit up and stand up. Your baby will get more stubborn. Your baby will learn to talk and yell "Mama!" Keep these things in mind when deciding what age to start. Also, the older they get the louder their cry is. That is something to consider if you have older children or close neighbors. I like starting young because there are fewer factors to consider. Older babies getting into toddlerhood start to have nightmares and have fears. And while a lot of children never CIO and can sleep just fine, I know several people who never did CIO with their children and now have 5 year olds who still have never slept through the night and end up in bed with them every night. One friend changed things with her second and did CIO and her 1 year old sleeps better than her 5 year old. My sister-in-law changed nothing and they bought a king size bed to fit their 5 year old and 2 year old in bed with them. So keep that in mind when you are deciding if CIO is for you or not. I think those cases are rare, but they do happen.
Poll Results: What age did you start CIO (approximate)?
Results:
1 Week: 4 votes (13%)
1 Month: 6 votes (20%)
2 Months: 7 votes (24%)
3 Months: 5 votes (17%)
4 Months: 1 vote (3%)
5 Months: 2 votes (6%)
6-12 Months: 4 votes (13%)
1 year or older: NO votes
Total of 29 votes
Other CIO Posts
- CIO Bootcamp: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/11/cio-bootcamp.html
- Poll Results: If you did CIO for middle of the night, how many nights did it last? : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/04/poll-results-if-you-did-cio-for-middle.html
- Problem Solving Tip: Detailed Log
- Nap Cues : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/03/nap-cues.html
- Waking Early From Naps/Won't Fall Asleep For Naps: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/waking-early-from-napswont-fall-asleep.html
- What Age Did You Start CIO (Approximate)? http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/poll-results-what-age-did-you-start-cio.html
- Word To the Weary: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/12/word-to-weary.html
- CIO Responsibly
- CIO (blog label)
Reader Experience:
- kindra said...
In response to your post: I started with my baby girl at 5 weeks. I had been reading the book when I was pregnant, and loved how the parenting philosophy and strategies fit in with my own. When my daughter was born, my husband asked our lactation consultant nurse about schedules and she had terrible things to say about schedules and in particular BW. This scared my husband and myself off, since we were first time parents and wanted to make sure we did everything right. By 5 weeks I was EXHAUSTED and sick of the unpredictability. I would rock her to sleep and lay her in her crib thinking "okay I can FINALLY sleep now, and she will PROBABLY sleep for 2 hours"...20 min later as I was just nicely dozing she was waking up! A friend at church that week suggested BW, and they are the parents of 5 amazing kids and then I remembered all the other amazing parents and kids we knew who had used BW and I picked it up again, and from that day on, my baby started crying it out. By 5 weeks, she was very used to me rocking her to sleep and being held as she fell asleep, so she would cry for up to 45 minutes sometimes, but by week 2 that had shortened to 30 minutes, and each successive week it was shorter still. She now no longer cries, or if she does it is only a bit of a whine for 5 minutes. Even though the nurse had "scared" us off of it at first, it was almost kind of a blessing in disguise. My baby had problems nursing (which we didn't know about) and she was feeding for up to an hour and a half and still screaming. I assumed she was colicky, but by 2 weeks I had had enough and saw a lactation consultant. We figured out our nursing problem and started supplementing her with formula. Suddenly we had a happy baby on our hands! I think if I had tried to do BW at this time, not knowing what was going on I would have been very frustrated (I already was)...so definitely if you have feeding problems it is NOT the time to start crying it out. You want to make sure you have all that other stuff under control first. Anyways, I love BW and have no regrets about using it! Thanks again for your awesome blog!
February 7, 2008 1:03 AM
Plowmanators said...
Thanks Kindra! Thanks for sharing your experience. I am glad you found us.
February 7, 2008 9:54 AM
Reader Questions:
- Melissa said...
i have a question. my daughter is 8 weeks old. she only naps in her swing (moving) and sleeps through the night in her swing (unmoving). she hates the crib, seems like she hates being flat on her back. my doctor seems to think it is too early to start letting her CIO. any advice?
January 29, 2008 4:43 PM
Plowmanators said...
Strange. Does she have any heartburn or reflux? I wonder what she likes about the swing. They do sell things to put the crib mattress at an incline. You could try that. Do you have a bassinet? If she likes the smaller space, you could put her in one of those, and can also incline those.I don't think 8 weeks is too young to CIO. I started my first at 9 weeks and my second at 1 week. I think the longer you wait, the harder and longer the road. But I also think you need to be ready for it. You need to decide when baby is ready, and when you are ready. It is not an easy emotional journey. I personally will always start my children as early as I think they are ready for it.
January 30, 2008 7:17 PM
Melissa said...
Thanks - I appreciate your comment especially how you need to be ready. I think she likes the swing because it is a papasan, so it cradles her. She will sleep through the night in the crib but continually wakes herself *and us* up in the crib because she knocks herself in the face. Swaddling just makes her mad. In time it will be ok. Thanks for your comment.
February 3, 2008 10:55 AM - Catherine said...
Thanks Valerie. Any ideas on how to CIO at night if necessary?
March 5, 2008 10:51 AM
Plowmanators said...
To CIO at night, you just do it. I haven't ever done CIO in the middle of the night, and I wouldn't recommend it until baby is sleeping well in the day. Your nerves will be shot if you try it all at once. I always just fed my kids when they woke in the middle of the night. Then they slept through and all was fine. Some do need CIO in the night, though. I would just wait until day is getting better before you move on to the night.
March 5, 2008 1:59 PM - Catherine said...
Hi Valerie, I'm glad to hear you had a similar experience! Usually when he hits the crib and jostles, then eventually starts crying, I just feed him again until he is so asleep that he doesn't wake up again when he hits the crib. But I don't want nursing to become a sleep prop for him in the middle of the night when he wakes up and can't fall back asleep right away. I want to be able to put him right down after I know he's gotten a full feed and walk away, knowing he can get himself back to sleep if he has been woken up a little bit by the transfer. Anyway, my husband and I really need some more sleep, though, so I think your idea is a good one- we're still trying to get his days down so his nights have been so messed up anyway. He's been up every 3 hours just like it's daytime. Last night we just put him straight in the swing after the feeding, he jostled there too but he went right to sleep the first two feedings, the third he cried very loudly for like 20 minutes, was quiet for about 15, then cried again or about 5 before finally falling asleep- to wake up 1 hr. 25 min. later. Also I am definitely doing my best to make sure he gets a full feeding- and I should mention that he's 6 weeks today, is the potential growth spurt just a double whammy with the fact that his days have been so wacky lately?Any thoughts on a good strategy for us?
March 5, 2008 7:38 PM
Plowmanators said...
Yes, six weeks is a very difficult time, especially for breastfeeding moms. Your prolactin levels drop, which help make breastmilk. You definitely want to make sure you nurse as often as he needs to ensure the needs of the growth spurt are met and you maintain a good milk supply. Remember, you always feed baby when he is hungry. Then you try to figure out why he is hungry early. If it is a growth spurt, you just feed away until he is out of it. If it is something else, you try to solve problems that way.
March 6, 2008 10:03 AM - Nicole Flowers said...
Have a CIO question: when you decide to start letting the baby CIO, do you do it every single time you put them down, both day naps and night sleeps? I assume consistency is important. Also related -- we will be traveling in about 10 days.. I want to start now but would you recommend we wait? The good news is that he will be sleeping in the same pack and play no matter where we are. Thank you for all your advice. You already have been very helpful!
July 31, 2008 2:55 PM
Plowmanators said...
Nicole, Yes, every time. Consistency is the main ingredient for success.Tricky timing. By now you are a week away. It is long enough to get started and possibly have success. If you won't continue CIO there, I think I would just wait. If you start it, stop it, then start it again, it might be too confusing for him.
August 3, 2008 4:14 PM - Stephanie said...
It is 2 am and I'm really desperate. My 5.5 old son was sleeping great through the night until we went on vacation and then started getting up 1-2 times. We have been back for 2 weeks now and he is still getting up. To get him to sleep through the night before I started him on solids and was able to go in and slowly nurse him less and less (5 min, 4 min, 3min, ect) and this work but it is not working at all now. He has started getting up consistently every 5 hours from when we put him to bed and all he wants to do is nurse for like 2 minutes and then he is fine. Tonight we decided to just let him cry it out (he gets 10x worse when we interfere) but it has been an hour. Is this too long? When do I go in and just rock him to sleep? I really have no idea what to do anymore? Can he really be hungry????? He is currently breast feeding 5 times with 3 solid feedings a day ( 2 2oz of thick cereal and then a veggie at night). I know he can sleep through the night but how long should I let him cry, I"m just confused and tired. Please help :(
September 11, 2008 2:07 AM
Plowmanators said...
This is one reason I don't do CIO at night. We (as parents) always end up getting desperate for sleep and interfere, which only hinders CIO progress. For some it works out great, but I would only do it if you know for sure there is no reason for the waking.It could be a growth spurt, it could be teething...see this post for more ideas:5-8 Month Sleep Disruptions : http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/05/6-month-sleep-disruptions.html
It is best to find the reason for it and treat that. This post will give you guidance.
September 15, 2008 3:01 PM - erin said...
I have a 12, almost 13 week old baby boy who is still not sleeping through the night. He sleeps well during the day and on his own. We haven't had to have any CIO times beyond on occasional 10 minutes. He really sleeps easily on his own, which is very different from his sister who had to CIO hard for a couple weeks, but slept through the night at 6 weeks old. I am not sure what to do about it for several reasons. The biggest of my reasons is that we will be moving sometime in the next 4 weeks to another house. Even though I feel ready to let him CIO and if feel he is ready too, I don't know when it is appropriate to do it around a move. Also right now, he is sharing a room with his older sister who just turned two. I can let him fuss for 10 minutes or so, which I have done, and she isn't bothered by it. Anyways we only have 2 bedrooms right now, so there is no other room for him to sleep in and I don't want to put my daughter through a whole night of crying. Overall, the sharing a room thing is working out really well and I would like to continue it when we move, and use the pack and play in our large closet for him to sleep in while he has to CIO once we move. When would it be OK for me to start CIO with him. Should I wait potentially another month until we move before we CIO , and if so what is the best way to deal with the night wakings now without creating deeper habits. I have tried not feeding him when he wakes at first, to see if he is really hungry, and it usually works to just give him a pacifier to go back to sleep, and if he wakes again I usually feed him. However since I have started doing this, he is begining to wake up more frequently andI believe it is b/c he is wanting me to give him a pacifier everytime he wakes instead of going back to sleep himself. When he does feed at night it isn't for long and when he wakes in the morning he isn't very hungry. He actually wakes up more now than he did when he was younger. Overall, he is a good sleeper during the day and has always gone with a schedule very naturally. I am just not sure what to do.
September 29, 2008 1:25 PM
Plowmanators said...
Erin, If it were me, I would wait. With the move and the time change coming up, I think it would just be better to wait. However, if you really feel like he is ready, see if you can send your girl somewhere (grandmas?) to sleep over and try it. The difficulty would be if he is one that needs a few weeks of CIO rather than one night. But you could try it. Remember boys do statistically sleep through later than others. Good luck!
October 1, 2008 3:59 PM - mshave said...
Hi Val, I was just wondering...I have been letting my 3 week old son CIO for 5days now and it has been rough! Often times he cries for an hour and still doesn't fall asleep so I end up putting him in his swing for the rest of his nap time. I know that I read that after 8 weeks you said Kaitlyn rarely cried at all...will it be this rough for 8 weeks? Or, does it progressively get better?? I just don't think I can endure 1 hour crying sessions at every nap and bedtime for 8 weeks! Please help!
December 30, 2008 12:23 PM
mshave said...
Hello! I just wanted to post a follow up to my previous post regarding CIO.I let my son (3 weeks old) CIO for 7 straight days for every nap and bedtime. I noticed some improvement but not anything to brag about. He is a very persistent little boy!(BTW-CIO worked in just 3 days with my daughter...so, if this is the way you want to go, please don't let my post discourage you. Also, I think timing is very important. I didn't do CIO with her until she was 3 months...so, timing may have been the problem here too) As I have to go back to work in Feb, I had to find another way to sleep train him. So, I picked up "Secrets of the Baby Whisperer" and found that her sleep training technique worked better for me and my son. After three days, I can put him down with little to no fuss. I am an advocate for CIO in some situations and you have to do what is right for you and your family. In my case, I didn't want to let my son CIO during the entire time I was off for maternity leave. I know that I may have to put in a little bit of extra work later, but I am willing to accept that as I have a very happy and well rested little boy on my hands now!
January 6, 2009 9:59 AM
Plowmanators said...
mshave, It gets better, but it isn't necessarily a progressive step-by-step better. It is more like a two steps forward, one step back. But as time goes on, the steps back happen less frequently. I am glad that the Baby Whisperer has worked for you. It is perfectly acceptable; you are still teaching him to self-soothe.
January 6, 2009 4:26 PM
Posts
23 comments:
My baby is 10 weeks old and we have only been doing BW for 1 week... it has worked miracles. My question is... I feel like 6 feedings during the day is more natural. I feel like I'm cramming the feedings in at the end of the day. If she is still not STTN, can I eliminate a feeding and stretch her to 3-3.5 hours. She wakes every night around 3:30/4, eats and goes right back to sleep. Please advise... do I need to do 7 feedings plus the middle of the night feeding totally 8?
Kris, age-wise, that is fine. Just know that dropping day feedings in the day before night feedings are eliminated usually means night feedings will last longer. However, some moms find that doing what they feel they should in the day actually helps improve nighttime sleep.
Hello there -
Strange...I left this comment yesterday but it is not showing up anywhere. Apologies if you get this twice!
We have been doing CIO with my baby girl for 7 weeks now (She is 8 weeks today). She has been getting better and goes down for most naps with no or little crying (knock on wood - I hope I don't jinx myself!) However, she is consistently having a difficult time with her last nap of the day (after her 6:00 pm feed). She falls asleep after crying but wakes up (after 30-45 mins) and is just not able to put herself to sleep. When it is half an hour befoer her next feed, we just get her and try to rock her to sleep. I noted that she used to fall asleep in the chair either after a long time (20-25 mins of rocking or not at all). Last two nights, I noticed that she is actually quite awake and happy. She looks at the ceiling fan and talks to it :) Is it that she is getting too much sleep from her prior 3 naps (almost 2 hours each since I had to cut back the wake time to get her to nap better)? Is she ready to drop this nap? She is only 8 weeks old and is on a strict 3 hour schedule because I had a difficult time earlier in getting her to sleep through her naps when we were doing CIO.
Or should I jsut stick with the CIO and she will get through this nap as well? It is tough to stick with it after hearing her cry for 7 weeks!
Thanks!
Hello there:
Not sure if I am doing this right and you are getting my questions. In the past, you have been so good about responding so quickly that I think that perhaps I am doing something wrong. Is there an email address perhaps that I can write to? Mine is sbadola@hotmail.com
I DESPARATELY NEED HELP. We have been doing sleep training for EIGHT WEEKS now (we started in when my girl was a week old). We have two humps that we cannot seem to get over:
1. Evening naps - last two naps fo the day (3:00 feed and 6:00 feed). SHE WILL JUT NOT GO DOWN. She will whimper and cry and just cannot put herself to sleep.
2. Waking up out of a nap - she will wake up out of her naps as well. Sometimes, she'll cry for 10-15 mins and put herself back to sleep. Most of the times she won't.
After 8 weeks of doing this, I really need hope to go on. It is getting better, but no where near what I had thought. Is there a problem that she cannot put herself back to sleep? Should I stick with CIO for some time? Or just give up?
In your blog, you've indicated that putting themselves back to sleep is tougher form of self-soothing than putting themselves to sleep. But when will she get it?
Also - she does not take a pacifier. Perhaps this will help soothe her? I am not sure how to give it to her. In the past, when I've tried, she has spit it out. And it has not worked.
PLEASE HELP!
Manisha,
The time of day after the 6 PM feed is 100% a normal time of day for her to have a difficult time. a 30-45 minute nap is also 100% normal. She isn't ready to drop it, she just doesn't need it to be longer than it is, and that is just fine.
If she is breastfed, I would actually recommend you feed her when she wakes. Both of my kids needed to be fed earlier at this time of day than the rest of the day. Most moms have lower milk supply in the late afternoon (and/or lower quality of milk--meaning fewer calories), so baby needs to eat sooner. We even had times where this interval was only 2 hours.
For the waking early in naps, see this post for options on what to do:
Waking Early From Naps/Won't Fall Asleep For Naps: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/waking-early-from-napswont-fall-asleep.html
When she will get it is just dependent on her. Think back to when it started. Did it start around 6 weeks? If so and you did not feed her as soon as she woke, she might still be trying to fulfill a growth spurt need. See the blog label "growth spurts" for much more on this.
As far as time to respond to questions, it typically takes me about 5 days (you can see this in the Welcome message on the side of each page). There are a lot of questions that get asked each day and it takes me some time to get through them.
i have just discovered your blog and it is wonderful. I had a few questions for you. after reading about scheduling and crying it out, I decided to put my daughter on a similar schedule to what you had for your daughter at 3 months. My daughter is 11 weeks old and is formula feed. Prior to trying this new schedule she was on a 3-31/2 hour schedule but was not napping well at all and is not sleeping through the night. I thought it was time to try crying it out and after a suggestion that it might be best to move to a 2 1/2 hour schedule when starting to sleep train, I deceided to try it. However my daughter doesn't take a full feeding anymore. She may take 3oz at one feeding, 1 oz at the next, 4 oz at the next and so on. I am worried that she is just snacking. I am also wondering if I should have kept her on the 3- 31/2 hour schedule. Because she has not been napping well I felt that on a 3- 31/2 hour schedule she would cry for up to 2 hours which is a very long time. I am confused and want to do the best thing for my daughter. I am worried if I change things again she is just going to get confused. The schedule I am using is 7:30am feed, 8:30nap, 10feed, 11 nap, 12:30 feed, 1:30nap, 3:30 feed, 4:30nap, 6 feed, 7 bed, 10 dreamfeed, and she wakes once in the night around 2-3am. The hour waketime seems to be good. She does show signs of being tried after being up for 1 hr. I also have a 2year old son who naps in the afternoon 1-3:30. we used babywise for my son and he followed the book to a T but my daughter has been more challenging (very fussy). Please help
heather
I just left a question but forget to add a few things. I hope I have posted my questions correctly and that you are able to receive them. We have been trying this new schedule for 3 days. The napping seems to be a bit better but the feeding is now a problem. My other concern is that when i put her down for a nap she usually cries for 5-10 mins and then settles but will only sleep for 20-40mins at the most and I have been leaving her in her crib until the next scheduled feeding. During this time she is either just lying there awake or she will be crying. I don't know what to do. In the past I have tried putting her in the swing but she doesn't seem to like it and it is also very loud with my son playing. I really need your advice.
Heather, if she isn't taking a full feeding, I would go back to the other feeding schedule. Some babies really don't need 2.5 hour intervals; I have noticed with my new baby that she really does a lot better on a 3 hour interval than a 2.5. See this post for more ideas on her not sleeping or waking early:
Waking Early From Naps/Won't Fall Asleep For Naps: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/waking-early-from-napswont-fall-asleep.html
My 3 m/o has been CIO for 11 days. We started late due to reflux that is now well controlled. We are about to have a very hectic family schedule over the next 3 weeks. Should I suspend CIO until we are back on track? Or should I still keep trying when we are home? The biggest problem with "putting" him to sleep is that he doesn't sleep long enough. Plus the night waking.
Once we are settled again in 3 weeks, should I just start CIO from day 1? It was suggested to me to ease him into it. I don't really know what that would mean. I'm more of an all or nothing kind of mom when it comes to this.
Thank you for your help! This is my 4th baby, I am so thankful for all the information and help your blog provides! I wish I'd had this with my other 3! Would have saved a lot of mommy tears!
Thank you for your response. I have changed her schedule to a 31/2-4 hr schedule starting at 7:30feed(9-11nap), 11feed (1-3nap)3feed (4:30-5:30nap) 6:30feed 7:00 bed 10:00-10:30 dreamfeed. We have been on this schedule for about 2 weeks and have also been CIO for 2 weeks. Her morning nap has been great. She goes down pretty good, will cry for about 5minutes and sleeps until 11:00 and I usually wake her up. Should I let her sleep longer and have her wake on her own? If I do this when would I feed her? Her afternoon nap isn't great. she goes down with some crying 5-10 minutes and will sleep until 2. She wakes crying. I would like her to put herself back to sleep but she is not able to do it. She will cry on and off until I get her at 3:00. I find this nap very difficult because my 2 year old son is sleeping in the room beside. Should I keep her up longer maybe 1:30? She then naps at 4:30 she shows signs of drowsiness at this time but has a difficult time going down for this nap. Sometimes she will sleep 30minutes and other times she won't sleep at all, she will just cry and fuss until I get her at 5:30. we have been feeding her at 6:30-6:45pm and then putting her to bed at 7pm. She is not yet STTN she is waking anywhere from4:30am-5:30am and for the past 2 weeks I have been leaving her until 7:30am. Should I get her sooner? I don't think she needs a feeding at this time because when I did feed her, she wouldn't feed at 7:30am. I am also wondering about dropping her dreamfeed but don't know if I should until she is STTN?? Any advice or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
I forgot to mention that lately my daughter does not seem interested in the dreamfeed. She my only take 3oz of an 8oz bottle. She is not STTN should I continue with the Dreamfeed even though she is not eating much and seems fussy? Thanks for your help
hello,
can you please paint me a detailed picture of what cio actually looks like? i keep reading vague experiences, but i want to know what it actually looks like.
for example, if i put my daughter down for bedtime at 7pm (she is 4 weeks old), and she sleeps for a bit, then starts crying...does cio mean i let her cry for 15 minutes, check her, and she is fine, then leave her to cio until the next feeding? or am i to check her at 15 minutes, check her again 20 minutes later, then again 20 minutes later?
i guess i want to know specifics of what people are actually doing--what does cio look like?
thanks.
hopeful, you should check out the CIO Bootcamp on this blog: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/11/cio-bootcamp.html
It is the best resource I have read on any website or in any book on how to realistically approach CIO. Good luck!
Stephanie, Sorry this is a late responses to your question that about the next three weeks. At this point, if you stopped CIO during this time, you want to just start it. I don't really know how you would ease into CIO either. It seems that would have to involve inconsistency which wouldn't do him any favors. Let me know if you have more questions!
Heather,
You want to wake baby if needed to stay on schedule. Since you are on a 3.5-4 hour schedule, you can to to 11:30 for that first interval if needed. That puts you at 4 hours.
It takes time for babies to learn to put themselves back to sleep mid nap. So since you had been doing CIO for 2 weeks, I would give it more time before expecting her to settle back in mid-nap. An idea for you is to put her in a bassinet or pack-n-play in your room (or a room away from DS's room) so you don't have to worry about his nap being ruined. It is possible she would settle after a couple of minutes, but you likely don't let her go that long with DS next door sleeping (I don't think I would either :) ).
It is totally normal for the last nap of the day to be short like that, and also for baby to be fussy before hand. Watch the stimulation she gets before it. Since her nap before that one isn't great, she might need to go down earlier for it.
Don't drop dreamfeed before STTN unless you really feel like she would sleep better without it--some babies do.
I would stick with the dreamfeed and see if she will take it, but if not, you might as well stop doing it and see what happens. But know that since her last feeding of the day is at 6:30, she likely won't be able to make it much past that in the morning, so her waketime would be 6:30-7:00 ish.
Hello. I've been searching on your website and have found bits and pieces to my questions but just need some redirection or confirmation.
My son is now 7 1/2 weeks old and we've been doing BW from the very beginning. By 5 weeks he had dropped is 130 am feed. He would stir around 330am at which point I would put a soother in his mouth and he would sleep for another 1 to 1 1/2 hours. I then realized that I couldn't be putting in the soother all the time so he need to settle himself. Now he is waking up at 230am quite consistently and I am trying to let him CIO. Its been 4 days and only once has he STTN until 4 am. I always check on him, make sure he's bundled and change his diaper
My question is this:
1) Will I disrupt him changing his diaper because i know regardless he is always going to have a wet/ dirty diaper in the middle of the night. Also, do I just need to stick out the CIO as many people have mentioned it can take anywhere from 3 days to 2 weeks. I'm just concerned that maybe I should be feeding him, however he went those two weeks without eating at the 130 am mark. When he wakes again at 4am he is so hungry but then sleepy for his 7 am feed. Any thoughts are appreciated!
2) He also has about 2-3 naps during the day which he CIO. Some days we are out and about so he sleeps more. Would him not having the ability to CIO (as a result of a busier day/ more time in the car) be a factor in his nighttime sleep?
Thanks for you time and congrats on your new bundle of joy!
hopeful,
CIO is different for every baby, and every "expert" on the area has different suggestions. Why? Different things work for different babies. One of the hardest things about CIO is for the parent to figure out the specifics for her individual baby. Once you do, it goes pretty smoothly.
As Jennifer pointed out, my CIO bootcamp gives all of my tips for CIO (Thanks Jennifer!). It includes tips for checking on baby (if and when is dependent on the baby)
dear plowmanators,
thank you for responding to all my inquiries. i really appreciate the time you take to answer everyone's questions!
If I'm home with my baby during the day, can I CIO even if my husband isn't committed to it on the weekend (I often find him getting baby up, especially when I've left to get groceries and find them both asleep together on the couch)?
Jenna
1-It is possible to disrupt by changing the diaper. I find it wakes baby up a lot. I don't know what he is doing by now, but I would personally just feed him when he first wakes and go from there. Being able to do something a few times doesn't mean it will last forever (sadly :) ).
2-Definitely. Disruptions to the day will always affect nighttime sleep. I would keep a log and see how it affects him and then try to avoid disruptions as much as possible. You will have them--you have to continue living--but you can figure out how to minimize them. You can see the posts under "disruptions" and "flexibility" in the blog index for more on that.
You are welcome hopeful :)
Becky, This is a hard one. You can--that would be 5 days of consistency. Perhaps by then your husband would see the improvement and not interfere. But I would try to get him on board because it can really interefere with progress.
Thank you so much for doing this blog! I have a 6 week old and am wondering when it is ok to start CIO? We have done it sometimes but usually after a certain amount of time say 30 mins to an hour when put down for a nap we pick her up etc..put back down. She keeps crying so we pick up and hold her until she sleeps and we just keep her with us until she is asleep or it's time to eat. I think she is going through a growth spurt, and has had two days this week where she will not take a nap! What do we do in this situation? She is super tired and overstimulated all day and after I feed her I put her down almost right away because I don't want to keep her awake too long. She doesn't sleep though anyways. Please help...Thanks.
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