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More Than Making It Through the Day: 18-24 Months

When I had my first baby, I spent a good portion of the first six months of his life just hanging on there. I was pretty much just trying to make it through each day. If you have read my blog much, you probably know I didn't start Babywise with him from birth and I spent a lot of time feeling like we were playing catch up. I think, also, with that first baby it is just hard. Most of us have never in our lives had something so depend upon us for life. Most of us have never before been so isolated at home all day every day. There is a big learning curve with becoming a mom.

As I got a grip on things, I was able start adding stuff so we were doing more than just making it through each day. As I started writing this blog, I wanted to help other moms do more than just make it through the day, also. I wanted to help moms thrive through their days. And so in 2009 I wrote a series on "More Than Making it Through the Day." I left off at 18 months, and so today I write on more than making it through your day with an 18-24 month old.

I probably lost focus on the series at this stage because it is really one of my favorite stages. Newborn time is hard for me, but toddler time is delightful. Yes, they throw a lot of tantrums, but those tantrums don't bother me. 

These toddlers can be a real challenge. Most are challenging. You want to make sure you don't let any hard work you have put in to this point get lost by giving up a little. A way to make sure you don't lose ground is to set some goals for you and your child during this time period. This is how you do more than just make it through the day. Do not overwhelm yourself with too many goals at once--work on what seems appropriate at the time. Remember, this post is covering six months of your child's life. It doesn't all need to be focused on in one day. Let's talk about major points in the day.

MEALTIMES
  • Spoons and Forks: If your child is not feeding herself yet with a spoon and/or fork, choose a time to allow your child to practice. Know that it is a messy learning process. Expect and accept it. By 24 months, your child should be able to eat with at least a spoon if you allow it to happen.
  • Food Amounts: Know that your child will likely not eat much, at least at some meals. Toddlers can seem scary in how little they eat at times! Your child will not starve herself. Offer the food, limit snacks between meals, and let her listen to herself when she is full. If you don't allow snacking between meals, she will eat well at meals if she is hungry. I have had some toddlers eat basically a tablespoon of food at meals and some pound in more food than I can. These kids know if they are hungry.
  • Booster Seat: Your toddler will likely want to ditch the high chair and move to a booster seat at the dinner table (at the dinner table; I am not talking the car). This is a fun time because you can free up space in your kitchen!
  • Picky Eaters: Watch for the picky eater being developed during this time. Your toddler is going to get an opinion. Do not start anything you don't want to keep up long-term. Do not make more than one meal. Do not allow your child to refuse all fruits and veggies. I think we are all entitled to like or not like some fruits and veggies, but we should have have some we like, too.
See these posts:
SLEEP TIMES
Your child should be down to one nap by now. A couple of mine went to one nap during this time period. 

Many toddlers start to try to add in various delay tactics before naps or bedtime at this age. Don't go into survival mode and try to give your toddler whatever she asks for just so she will go to sleep peacefully. The child will add more and more things over time if you start allowing her to set the routine.

There are things you can add or change. Brinley wanted to change her bedtime song during this time. No biggie. Brinley also wanted to add kisses and hugs to every member of the family. That is a sweet thing to add. But she likes to take it to "I will go give kisses, then once I am in my room, I will insist on hugs, also." We make sure kisses and hugs happen at the same time. She gets one round with the family :). Every one of my children has had a period of delay tactic efforts. This is a normal development in childhood. Brayden and Brinley were much more valiant in their efforts while Kaitlyn and McKenna were more half-hearted. 

INDEPENDENT PLAYTIME
Your toddler will likely be in roomtime instead of just a pack and play. Some do this at age 2 or a bit older, but many do it during this range (if not earlier). 

Your child might learn to open doors. Your child might start to "ransack" the room during independent play. You still want to have boundaries and rules on this activity. Do not lose your ground by allowing "anything goes" for independent playtime. 

If you haven't added this to your day yet, do it! It can be done at any age. See these posts for more:

FREE PLAYTIME
Allow your child some time each day to have some free play where she gets to decide, within reason, what to do. See Free Playtime for more.

SIBLING PLAYTIME
If your toddler has siblings, have time each day for her to play with the sibling. You can have this be part of your free time or as a structured activity. When my children were younger, I had sibling play be structured, but with my younger two, their time with siblings has been more free. This is because I can trust the older children to be responsible during playtime. See Structured Playtime With Siblings for more. 

CLEANING TIME
Do some of your chores each day with your child. She will want to do everything you do. This is a powerful age range to lead by example. It is a million times harder to do any task with a toddler in tow, but there are great benefits from letting your toddler tag along. See 

ONE-ON-ONE TIME WITH PARENTS
We love to do dates with our kids. This is an age you can start doing "dates" with your child to make sure you get some one-on-one time. If it is just you and your child together most of the time, you don't necessarily need an official date, but do try to have time when you are consciously spending it with your child. This is time when you aren't reading a book, pursuing Pinterest, or checking in on Facebook. This is just you and your child.

Dates with this age group are easy. Going for a walk is a good one. You could plan a date to read book after book together. You can go to the park. These children are very easily pleased :) See 

One-On-One Outings for more.


FRIEND TIME
Your toddler will still be a tandem player at this age. This means that playing is done more in the same room than interactively. This will be especially true if the child being played with is the same age. Children this age are not cooperative beings. 

Right around 18 months, most toddlers grow into a stage of not wanting to share. This is totally normal. A man I know pointed out that a child has to learn to be selfish before he can learn to share. A child isn't sharing if he doesn't feel possession over something. You will need to work with your child on sharing during this age range. Be respectful of your child; sharing doesn't have to mean one child gives up a toy as soon as another child wants it. Your child will like sharing better if realistic, real-life rules are set for sharing.

FAMILY TIME
As you go through each day, spend time together as a whole family. Eat at least one meal together. Do fun things together. Go for walks together. Have fun together as a family.

BATH TIME
Bath time can be a fun part of your day. You can add in fun things like bubbles or bath paints. My first three children loved to take baths and would take long ones. Brinley is more of a 10-15 minute bather. I don't stress out about her not wanting to take a long bath. There are plenty of other things we can do in the day.

OUTSIDE TIME
Spend some time outside each day. Think of things you can do in any weather. Your child might like a balance bike, tricycle, or plasma car at this age range. 

ART TIME
You can have art time in your day. You can think of the broad spectrum of arts. Sing, listen to music, dance, or draw. There are a lot of learning ideas on the internet these days. 

LEARNING ACTIVITIES
With that in mind, try to work in some learning time each day. For this age range, I find it helpful if you go with what your child is focusing on learning. For example, Brinley has been obsessed with colors for a while now. She was determined to learn her colors. Developmentally, most children learn colors around age 3. I let her have her obsession, however, and we did activities revolving around colors. At first, she bombed the activities. Over time, she got to be very good at her colors and learned them all. 

If your child doesn't have an area of focus, just rotate through different activities you find that are age appropriate. Never forget about good old coloring. It is a great classic and builds fine motor control in the hands.

Don't discount singing fun songs, the ABCs, reading nursery rhymes, and other similar activities as learning moments. Also, look for learning moments in play. Maybe you can count how many socks you put on each day. Maybe you can say the color of the shirt you put on each day. These are simple little things you can do to make your day more than just survival. See these posts for more:

LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT
Your toddlers language will explode during this time. Talk to your child often. Talk, talk, talk. Also, be sure to read each day. Reading is huge in helping to build vocabulary. 

MORAL TRAINING
Remember your moral training during this time. We are talking self-control, obedience, manners (please, thank you), patience, etc. Teach your child to say "Yes Mom" as much as possible (many do not say sentences yet, so a "yes" or a "mommy" is fine). These are all works in progress; don't expect perfection. I promise the effort to do this young will pay off! See these posts for more:
SPIRITUAL TRAINING
Remember to have prayers each day. Pray over food. Pray before bed. Your child will just sit with eyes open for a while, but during this age range, your child will start to fold arms or clasp hands. Your child will start to bow her head. Your child might even start to add her own "amen" to the prayer. Lead by example here.

POTTY TRAINING
You might enter the world of potty training during this time. Many people claim an 18 month old is easier to potty train than a 24 month old. I like to have the child be eager to potty train before I start it, but many love doing it at 18 months. See these posts for more:

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Index: More Than Making It Through The Day

Birth Through 12 Months
12 Months and Up
Motherhood
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More Than Making it Through the Day: 15-18 Months

This is not a time to pat yourself on the back and stop working toward goals. You still have about 17 good years of training your child to put in, so keep working at it! Your toddler might be eating and sleeping well, but that is only a small portion of what you want for your child. The eating and sleeping well are good stepping stones for working on the bigger picture, they are not THE picture.

These three months can be really easy or a bit of a challenge. They might be really easy if your toddler sticks to two naps a day. If your toddler moves to three, however, you might find yourself wondering what to do with your child during all of this extra time.

By 15 months old, most toddlers are walking and can say at least one word. I personally love toddlers. They are so fun. Everything around them is so fascinating, and as you spend time with them, you come to see and hear things you hadn't paid attention to in years.

Much of the advice for 15-18 months is the same as 12-15 months. After listing the different activities for the day and special considerations for each activity, I am going to delve into the whys behind the activities to help you keep a focus in mind while you do it. Having a goal to work toward is a big difference between making it through the day and more than making it through the day.

Be sure to see this post for schedule ideas: Sample Schedules: One Year and Up

MEALTIMES
  • Self-Feeding: The biggest concern with mealtimes during this time will be your toddler learning to eat from a spoon. Expect things to be messy as he learns. He can't be perfect. See this post for more: Toddlers and Spoons
  • Throwing/Dropping Food: Your toddler might start to throw or drop food from the highchair as he now has more control over his food. See this post: Throwing/Dropping Food off of the Tray
  • Food Amounts: Just because he is now a toddler does not mean you will worry less about his food intake. See Food Amounts for Toddlers for guidance.
NAPTIMESThere is a good chance your toddler will be ready to drop the morning nap during this period. Most drop it around 18 months, though there is a wide range around that.
INDEPENDENT PLAYTIMEBy the end of this range, most will be ready to move to roomtime for independent play rather than playpen time if they haven't already. And it still isn't too late to start this if you haven't already.
FREE PLAYTIMEYou allow your child to choose the activity he plays with. That is why it is "free." He doesn't get to jump from activity to activity; you want him to learn to have a sustained attention span. But he can have more than one toy available to him during this time. Free playtime can really be any activity the child chooses. Your toddler still needs to be supervised during this playtime. See free playtime (blog label) for more.
STRUCTURED PLAYTIMEStructured playtime is when Mom decides the activity. This is a good thing for your toddler to learn to accept; in educational settings (and life), we don't always get to choose what we do. This time can be art, music, puzzles, or other learning activities. The child can work alone or with a parent or sibling (see below). See structured playtime (blog label) for more.
SIBLING PLAYTIMEIf your toddler has siblings, you can have sibling playtime. This can overlap with other activities if needed. For example, the siblings can both color at the table together for structured playtime. Or maybe they will go outside to play together for outside time.
Keep in mind that most 15-18 month olds are not interactive players. They play in tandem. They won't necessarily play with the older sibling. However, some will. Kaitlyn is very social and would actually play with Brayden during this time. From what I read, it is common for younger siblings to be more socially interactive at an earlier age than the oldest who was an only child.
ONE-ON-ONE TIME WITH PARENTS
The importance of this activity never diminishes. Continue to be sure to incorporate one-on-one time with each parent each day. This can overlap with structured playtime. Mommy or Daddy can sit at the table with the toddler while he colors and join in the coloring. It can also overlap with other appropriate playtime activities.
FRIEND TIMEThe older your toddler gets, the more he will enjoy playing with friends. At this age, play is still very much in tandem; they don't really interactively play with each other. But being in each other's presence is fun. Be sure you take things at the pace of your individual child. Some toddlers will love jumping in with a bunch of other rowdy toddlers. Others will need some time to get used to the activity and might prefer starting with just one other toddler.
FAMILY TIME
It is fun to do activities together as a family. You might go for walks, read books, work in the yard, go out to dinner, take a vacation, go to a museum...the possibilities are endless.
BATHTIME
Bath time can be a fun time to get water play in. It is a good opportunity for your child to fulfill that curiosity with water. What happens when I dump a cup of water out? Your child can figure that out in the tub. It will also stimulate the sense of touch. Best Toys for Baby: Bath Toys
LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENTAs your toddler starts to speak more, it will be easier for this to be a focus for you. Your toddler will demonstrate more and more the vast amount that he understands. You will most likely be quite shocked. We were even shocked with Kaitlyn. Continue to work on language development.
  • Sign Language: It isn't too late to start this. Watch for words that would help your child avoid tantrums or words that your child seems to try to communicate but can't say yet. It can also come in handy for those words that sound the same. Many toddlers pronounce words very similarly. If you have signs to turn to, you can help have more effective communication. If you have been doing this for a while, you can most likely do a new word each day, or at least several per week. Sign Language
  • Reading: Reading is a fun activity to have as one-on-one time with a parent. Be sure to point to the objects in the book and name them for your toddler. Non-BW: The Value of Reading: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/non-bw-value-of-reading.html
  • Talk Back: When your child talks to you, listen and talk back. Keep in mind the principles from the previous making it through the day post for ages 9-12 months old.
    Language Development
TIME OUTSIDE You can continue the activities you have been doing outside (walks, hikes, etc.). Here are some other ideas:
  • Sledding: You can still spend time outside if there is snow. Be sure to dress your child appropriately. I have heard it is a good idea to not allow a child to be out in the cold for longer than 15 minutes at a time, though I have nothing to back that up with.
  • Sandbox: The sandbox is a fun place to play.
  • Mimic: Toddlers love to mimic their parents. If you garden, you might get some gardening toys for your toddler. If you have a lawn to mow, a lawnmower.
  • Bubbles: This is always fascinating for the toddler.
  • Outside Toys: See this post for outside toy ideas: Baby Stuff I Love: Outdoor Toys
ARTSYou can add some time for the arts. You might dance, sing, and/or draw. It is wonderful to pass on your passion to your children, but also be sure you expose them to arts that aren't necessarily your interest. For example, I love to sing and I love to dance. It is quite natural for me to expose my children to these items. I am not an artist when it comes to drawing, painting, etc. These are activities I have to make a conscious effort to add to our day because it isn't a natural interest of mine.
TOYS
Your child's interests and abilities will continue to mature as he gets older. See this post: Best Toys for Baby: 12-18 Months
LEARNING
You might be especially interested in learning activities now. Keep in mind that your child can't learn things he isn't taught, so this is up to you. See these posts:
GOAL SETTINGWe want to really focus on why we are doing what we are doing (see Why vs. How ). To do more than make it through the day, it requires structure, organizing, and planning. All of the categories listed above serve more purpose than simply giving you and your toddler something to do all day. On Becoming Toddlerwise discusses three major categories you want to focus on (page 45):
  • Moral Training: You teach self-control, obedience, manners, patience, sitting, focusing, concentrating, and relationship with peers, siblings, and adults. Independent playtime, free playtime, structured playtime, sibling playtime, friend playtime, and one-on-one time with parents all contribute to meeting these goals. See also:
    "Yes Mom"
    Training in Times of Non-Conflict
    Hand Folding: Establishing Self-Control: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/02/hand-folding-establishing-self-control.html
    Creating a "Good Helper"
  • Academic Skills: This is teaching ABCs, mathematics, language, reading, and more. Structured playtime and one-on-one time with parents are both excellent points in the day to teach academic skills. You can also learn to work these things in throughout the day. When you are on a walk, you can count how many cars, cats, birds, etc. you see. You can get foam letters for the bathtub and sing the ABCs during bathtime. These skills can always be incorporated into your activities. Remember that people learn line upon line. Teach your child in steps (see learning section above for more about learning).
  • Spiritual Training: This involves anything spiritual that is appropriate to teach your child. This can be teaching to say prayers, which at first is done by the parent showing the example of how to do things. You can read scripture stories and teach about important people in your faith.
You want to set age appropriate goals for these areas. Don't do too many at once; you will only stress yourself and your toddler out. Think of where you want your toddler to be in a few months and work toward that. Your toddler needs direction to get there. For more on goal-setting, see Beliefs and Goals (Toddlerwise) .
Also, On Becoming Toddlerwise is written for ages 1-2 years old. Be sure to read it. On Becoming Toddlerwise
DISCIPLINE
Related Posts:
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More Than Making it Through the Day: 12-15 Months

If you have a 12-15 month old, your biggest concern in life right now is likely discipline. You also are experiencing big changes with appetite and perhaps even sleeping patterns in the day. You are starting to see your "baby" as more of a toddler and coming to realize the many things you need to teach him, and that might be a bit overwhelming. This is a time period you really want to be sure you, the parent, are in the habit of doing more than making it from sunrise to sunset without drama. Focus on discipline and focus on learning activities. Let's discuss the day.

MEALTIMES
You might suddenly find yourself as stressed about food as you were when your child was a newborn. Things are changing, and you aren't quite sure what is normal and what isn't. Here are some common concerns:
  • Drop in Appetite: This is an age range when most babies will severely drop the amount of food they eat each day. Most babies triple their birthweight in the first year, while in the second year they only add about a third of their birthweight (What to Expect the First Year, page 489). Food Amounts for Toddlers
  • Weaning From Bottle: If you haven't weaned from the bottle yet, make it a goal to start during this period. Weaning: Breast, Bottle, and Formula: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/weaning-breast-bottle-and-formula.html
  • Learning to Self-Feed: During this age range, most toddlers will start to want to feed themselves with a spoon. This will likely come closer to the end of this age range. Once your child shows interest, allow him to try. Expect a mess. So long as the mess is from your child just not being good at using the spoon yet rather than purposely making a mess, there is nothing to worry about (other than the fact that you have a mess to clean up). When letting him practice, be wise about what he practices with. Yogurt sticks to a spoon better than applesauce, for example. See Toddlers and Spoons
  • Seeming Regression: You will likely find your child wants to feed himself and gets started. Then he decides that he wants you to feed him. You might then worry that he is regressing and will never feed himself. My son did this; I had that worry. Some children really want independence, but then want to be a little kid again. This might be an oldest child thing; Kaitlyn isn't like that. But it also might just be Brayden's personality. Rest assured that your child will get to the point of eating independently.
  • Aligning Meals: If meals are not already in sync with the family, now is the time period to do so. Breakfast and lunch are most likely in line. Dinner is the harder one because most families eat dinner later than the child can make it. If so, offer a snack after the afternoon nap to hold baby over. You could even just do the liquid feeding at that point without any solid foods. Be sure to monitor the snack by paying attention to your child's appetite at dinner. If he isn't eating like he should, the snack was likely too large. Solids: Aligning Meals with the Family: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/12/solids-aligning-meals-with-family.html
  • Good Meals/Bad Meals: I have found that toddlers will often have a "bad" meal each day where they seem to eat nothing at all. They usually counter this with a "good" meal where they eat a lot. Transition yourself to looking at food intake as a whole each day rather than just each meal. It is normal for a toddler to have meals where he doesn't eat much, even for a toddler.
  • Eating What Family Eats: During this time period, you will likely start to feed your child whatever the family is eating. There will obviously be some things he can't eat because of safety (choking) or the food just isn't appropriate for that age of a child yet. But other things can be given. Some toddlers will still stay on pureed baby food during this time period. See Solids: When Do You Stop Babyfood and Move to "Real" Food?: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/12/solids-when-do-you-stop-babyfood-and.html
  • Dropping the 4th Feeding: Most toddlers will drop the fourth liquid feeding during this age range, though not all. Brayden kept it until 18 months. See Dropping the 4th Feeding
  • Bib Use: During this age range, Brayden was done with the bib. Your toddler is now watching everyone more closely and he will soon realize he is the only one eating with a bib. Kaitlyn continued her bib use through this stage, however.
NAPTIMES
Sleep should be of little worry during this stage. There are a couple of things that can come up:
  • Dropping the Morning Nap: Some babies are ready to drop the morning nap as early as 14 months. But be aware that most will be closer to 18 months. If you start having napping trouble, see this post: Dropping the Morning Nap (from 2 to 1 naps): Transition Time
  • You Slack on Consistency: As your baby becomes a toddler, you might start to slack on the consistency of meals and naps. You might start offering too many snacks or staying out during naptime. Be aware that eating patterns affect sleeping patterns and sleeping patterns affect eating patterns. This is not a time to stop concerning yourself with consistent naps. Your toddler might be able to miss one every so often, but don't make it a habit.
Your toddler's waketimes continue to increase. Add to that mobility and curiosity and you have lots of time to fill and lots of discipline issues that crop up.
INDEPENDENT PLAYTIME
For most toddlers in this age range, independent playtime will continue in the playpen. At some point, you might transition to roomtime. See:
FREE PLAYTIMEFree playtime starts to change during this age range. You allow your child to choose the activity he plays with. That is why it is "free." He doesn't get to jump from activity to activity; you want him to learn to have a sustained attention span. But he can have more than one toy available to him during this time. Free playtime can really be any activity the child chooses. Your toddler still needs to be supervised during this playtime. See free playtime (blog label) for more.
STRUCTURED PLAYTIME
Up to this point, structured playtime has been independent playtime. Now you add another element to your day. Structured playtime is when Mom decides the activity. This is a good thing for your toddler to learn to accept; in educational settings (and life), we don't always get to choose what we do. This time can be art, music, puzzles, or other learning activities. The child can work alone or with a parent or sibling (see below). See structured playtime (blog label) for more.
SIBLING PLAYTIMEIf your toddler has siblings, you can have sibling playtime. This can overlap with other activities if needed. For example, the siblings can both color at the table together. Or maybe they will go outside to play together for outside time. During this age range for Kaitlyn, I started to allow Brayden and Kaitlyn to be alone for longer increments, though still not very long. I always monitored them, also, after an interesting experience.
One time, they were playing in the sandbox together. Kaitlyn was about 12 or 13 months old, which put Brayden just under or at three years old. I ran inside to get something to work on the garden (which is right by to the sandbox). I was not gone for more than a few minutes. When I came back, I found Brayden had kindly turned on the hose and washed Kaitlyn's lower body off since it was sandy. This was a moment of childishness for him; he did not know there was anything wrong with it. She didn't object in the least. I realized I needed to instruct more before leaving them alone outside together. I also needed to observe more before being out of eye sight so I could grasp the things Brayden might do. I never imagined he would use the hose on her. I actually didn't know he was capable of turning it on himself. It was really quite funny, but not something I let Brayden see I found amusing.
ONE-ON-ONE TIME WITH PARENTS
Continue to be sure to incorporate one-on-one time with each parent each day. This can overlap with structured playtime. Mommy or Daddy can sit at the table with the toddler while he colors and join in the coloring.
FRIEND TIME
The older your toddler gets, the more he will enjoy playing with friends. At this age, play is still very much in tandem; they don't really interactively play with each other. But being in each other's presence is fun.
FAMILY TIME
It is fun to do activities together as a family. You might go for walks, read books, work in the yard, go out to dinner...the possibilities are endless.
BATHTIME
Bath time can be a fun time to get water play in. It is a good opportunity for your child to fulfill that curiosity with water. What happens when I dump a cup of water out? Your child can figure that out in the tub. Best Toys for Baby: Bath Toys
LANGUAGE DEVELOPMENT
Continue to work on this.
  • Sign Language: It isn't too late to start this. I started Brayden during this age range. Watch for words that would help your child avoid tantrums. If you have been doing this for a while, you can most likely do a new word each day, or at least several per week. Sign Language
  • Reading: Reading is a fun activity to have as one-on-one time with a parent. Be sure to point to the objects in the book and name them for your toddler. Non-BW: The Value of Reading: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/non-bw-value-of-reading.html
  • Talk Back: When your child talks to you, listen and talk back. Keep in mind the principles from the previous making it through the day post for ages 9-12 months old.
  • Language Development
TIME OUTSIDE
You can continue the activities you have been doing outside (walks, hikes, etc.). Here are some other ideas:
  • Sandbox: The sandbox is a fun place to play.
  • Mimic: Toddlers love to mimic their parents. If you garden, you might get some gardening toys for your toddler. If you have a lawn to mow, a lawnmower.
  • Bubbles: This is always fascinating for the toddler.
  • Outside Toys: See this post for outside toy ideas: Baby Stuff I Love: Outdoor Toys
ARTS
You can add some time for the arts. You might dance, sing, and/or draw. It is wonderful to pass on your passion to your children, but also be sure you expose them to arts that aren't necessarily your interest. For example, I love to sing and I love to dance. It is quite natural for me to expose my children to these items. I am not an artist when it comes to drawing, painting, etc. These are activities I have to make a conscious effort to add to our day because it isn't a natural interest of mine.
TOYS
Your child's interest will continue to mature as he gets older. See this post: Best Toys for Baby: 12-18 Months
OTHER INTERESTS
Your toddler will start to show interest in certain subjects. Is it trucks? Perhaps a car show would be of interest. Maybe he is interested in animals? The zoo might be a fun trip. Look around your area for age and interest-appropriate museums to visit.
LEARNING
You might be especially interested in learning activities now. See these posts:
DISCIPLINE
There are a lot of discipline concerns during the toddler years. Here are posts pertinent to this age group:
OTHER GOALS
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More Than Making it Through the Day: 9-12 Months

Many of us get quite nostalgic during this age range. Your baby is almost a year old! Your baby is almost not a baby anymore! Your baby is almost a toddler! I think most parents start to be thinking more about character training by this point. 6-9 months might have seemed really young, but 9-12 months starts to seem more appropriate. You start to really see some need for discipline (remember that discipline does not mean to punish but to correct).

Let's go through the day for ideas on this age range. It can be a hard age range for blanket statements. Some babies start walking. Others are content to just sit in one spot, not even attempting a crawl. For this reason, there will be varying degrees for need of discipline. You have little need to correct the child who can't move to a place she shouldn't be.

Mealtimes
By now, your baby is most likely eating solids and even finger foods. Most babies will have four liquid feedings. Some five, and some three. Here are some things to think about during this time period as far as mealtime goes:
  • Finger Foods: If you haven't started finger foods yet, here is a link to my post about it:
    Finger Foods: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/12/finger-foods.html
  • Snacks: As your child is awake longer and better at communicating, she might start asking for snacks. Be careful that you maintain the healthy eating patterns you have spent the last 9 plus months making. If your child needs a snack, that is fine. Be sure it is healthy and be sure it isn't so large that it interferes with the next meal. Snacks should be a planned part of the day. See: Snacks
  • Aligning Meals: This is the age range you might start to align meals with the family. Don't worry if your child isn't able to fully get there; there is plenty of time for it and it will come. See this post for more: Solids: Aligning Meals with the Family: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2007/12/solids-aligning-meals-with-family.html
  • Feeding Your Pre-Toddler: Some babies (like Brayden) are quite content to continue eating baby food as the main bulk of a meal during this age range. Others, like Kaitlyn, never really enjoyed baby food in the first place and really want to move on to bigger and better things. See this post for ideas if your baby is done with baby food: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/02/feeding-your-pre-toddler.html. If not, don't stress. Just continue to serve the mushy stuff :)
  • Avoid Sweets: I recommend you avoid sweets and other snacky items as long as you can. This is really easy with an only child. You can save those items for when baby is not around. Older siblings tend to expose baby to those items earlier. I know it can be fun to give these treats, and I know that grandparents often really want to feed these items to baby. The longer you wait, the better. Your baby will have more opportunity to develop a love for foods that are healthy.
  • Avoid Salt: Your baby also doesn't need salt and other spices on the food. Give your baby an opportunity to learn to like food as it is. You baby will have more than enough exposure to salt later in life.
  • Throwing Food: You baby might start (or continue) to throw food off the highchair. See: Throwing/Dropping Food off of the Tray
  • Three Feedings: Some babies might be able to go down to three feedings around this age. I didn't do that with mine. Both were on four until at least one year old. Brayden was quite a bit older before he went to three. See this post for more: Dropping the 4th Feeding
  • Weaning: You might start weaning during this period, or you might be planning on the 12 month mark (or later). This can be weaning from breast or bottle. If your baby is fed by bottle, I would suggest you start to work on weaning now. You can take it really slowly. If your child is nursed and you plan to wean at 12 months, I suggest you start thinking about how to do it so you can have a game plan in place. See:
    Weaning: Breast, Bottle, and Formula: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/weaning-breast-bottle-and-formula.html
    and
    In Action: Weaning from Breast
Naptimes
Generally speaking, there are few nap problems during this age range. If your child does have nap problems, please don't now freak out. Some do. But most don't.
  • Watch for sleep props: If your child has a favorite toy, blanket, finger, or pacifier to sleep with, this is the age range I noticed both of my children really get a strong attachment to these security items. Before this age range, they liked the items while sleeping, but didn't seem to give them a second thought once they were out of bed. During this age range, an emotional bond seemed to form. I recommend you don't let your child carry the item with her everywhere. Leave the pacifier in the crib. Instruct her gently to remove her fingers when they go in her mouth. It is fine to have these in bed, but try to prevent them from becoming a difficult habit to break in the future.
  • Third Nap: If your child hasn't dropped the third nap yet, she will during this age range. See: Dropping Naps: A Quick Reference and Dropping the 3rd Nap (evening): http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/dropping-3rd-nap-evening.html. Once this nap is dropped, baby's nighttime sleep will most likely extend by 30-60 minutes--at least for a short period while she gets used to having the nap gone.
  • Disruptions: Most disruptions that happen during this period are due to the child learning to stand, crawl, and or walk on her own. This will cause major disruptions for a couple of days. See: Nap Disruptions: Rolling, Standing, Crawling, etc: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/nap-disruptions-rolling-standing.html She might also start to play in the crib. See: Playing in the Crib/Bed
  • Remain Consistent: Many babies seem to need less sleep, and you might be tempted to skip naps or forget to put baby down in time for a nap. Optimal waketime is still important to the baby in this age group. Also, with all of the new activities you might be introducing, you baby might get overstimulated. If you are having nap problems, be sure there is not overstimulation or too long of a waketime.

Now on to the waketime activities.

Playtime
Here are some general thoughts for playtime:
  • Safety: If your baby is moving in any way, there is a good chance you have thought about Baby-Proofing. You want to keep things safe, but you also want to provide learning opportunities.
  • Toys: Your baby is about to leave baby-hood. Make sure you aren't assuming she still likes those toys she loved a few months ago: Out With the Old, in With the New (toys) Here is my post for toys in this age range: Best Toys for Baby: Ages 10-12 Months
  • Old Classics: There are many nursery rhymes and other games you may have forgotten about. Here is a list of some of the old classics that involve movement: Peek-a-boo, Patty Cake, Itsy-bitsy Spider, This Little Piggy, Ring-a-Round the Rosies, and Pop Goes the Weasel.

Independent Playtime
If you have been doing this from the beginning, or at least prior to this point, things pretty much continue as they did. See this blog label for all independent playtime posts: independent playtime

  • Keep it up!: Keep up independent play. It is very much worth it. Be sure it is a scheduled part of each day.
  • Resistance: You might find resistance to independent play as new skills came along. This is what happened to Brayden. He was fine with independent play. He did 30 minutes at a time with no problem. Then he learned to stand on his own. For some reason, he was then very angry with independent play. I made the mistake of stopping for several months. Don't make my mistake. Stick to it. See: Resistance to Independent Playtime
  • Adjust Length: Chances are you will need to adjust length now that your baby is likely gaining new physical skills: Independent Playtime Lengths
Free Playtime
Free playtime should look the same as it did in the past. Free playtime can be in the presence of other family members. She can sit in her highchair and play with toys while you make dinner. Once she can sit up on her own well, you can give her a basket of toys on the floor to play with. See Free Playtime for more on this.

If your child can now move on her own, remember that free playtime does not mean the child gets to wander the house looking for interesting things.

Sibling Playtime
If you have more than one child, you can have sibling playtime. You do not have to leave your children alone for this. What you do will depend on the age and maturity of the older child. During this age-range, Brayden was nearing three. I felt comfortable leaving them in the room together for up to five or so minutes, but I was never more than two seconds away. The two children interacted with each other a lot more during this age range, but still basically played side-by-side rather than together. Brayden did find that he could really make Kaitlyn laugh, and both really enjoyed that.

Sibling playtime can be in a toy room, outside, and really you could have it be with something like a walk. See this post for more on sibling playtime: Sibling Playtime. I wrote it when Kaitlyn was 10 months old.

One-on-One Time With Each Parent
Be sure that you have some time set aside each day for each parent to spend quality time with the baby. This can be in conjunction with other daily activities (reading, bathing, feeding solids, etc.) or it can be simply the parent playing with the baby. This is time when you are 100% baby's. As your baby gets older, you will most likely enjoy doing things that are more playful. You can play with toys. Dad might rough-house.

One note, if you have this one-on-one time be another activity, be sure you are focused on baby. If it is during feeding solids, don't have the TV on, don't be talking on the phone, etc. You are spending time with baby.

Play Dates
You can start or continue play dates. Interaction during this time will be similar to those described in the sibling playtime section above.

Language Development
Many babies will say their first word during this period if they haven't already. You will start to see language recognition in your child, and you will most likely be astonished as you come to realize how much she understands. See this post for more: Language Development.
  • Sign Language: Your child can most likely really take off with learning Sign Language. Make a goal to introduce as many words as your baby can learn. Some might be able to do one a day. Some might be able to do a few a week. Give her a chance to learn.
  • Read. Read books to your child. We have story time routinely with our bedtime routine. You can also have other stories during the day if you want to. Non-BW: The Value of Reading: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/non-bw-value-of-reading.html
  • Repeat: When your baby talks to you, respond. You can repeat what she says. Maybe she says "Yummy." You then say, "Is that food yummy? I am so glad." When she knows you are listening to and understanding her, it will give her more motivation to speak. If she is signing, sign and say the word back to her.
  • Listen: When she babbles, look at her and listen to what she has to say. I will say things like, "Really?" "That is very interesting" or "I love your stories."
  • Require Language Use: Once your baby has demonstrated a consistent ability to use a word, encourage her to use words. This can be either verbal or through signs. Don't be discouraged if she mixes words up or seems to forget things she used to know. Don't allow a tantrum to take the place of using a word she knows. See the Discipline section below for more.
  • Label: Label everything your baby sees. Help her to know what things are called.

Bathtime
As your baby gets older, bathtime only gets more exciting. Remember that as your child gets older, you need to be mindful of times you need to correct behavior. Bathtime can bring opportunities. Decide on what is and isn't okay with you. Is standing in the tub going to be okay? This is the age range that Brayden started to try to stand in the tub. Decide before this happens what is allowed and what your course of action will be when it does. Your child will splash, and how much splashing is appropriate will depend on you. See these posts also:
Best Toys for Baby: Bath Toys
Baby Stuff I Love: Bathtime

Time Outside
Assuming the weather is good enough for your baby during this time period, spend time outside. Since your baby is now much more aware of what is going on around her, this will be a much more fascinating activity. There is so much for your baby to take in. During this age range, Brayden was absolutely obsessed with going outside. It was a good activity for his expanding waketime. Physical activity is important, and the outdoors is a great place to encourage it.

  • Walks. Walks continue to be loved by baby. There are so many new things to see. Baby will likely try to communicate to you during the walk, so pay attention so you can respond to the 'questions' and attempts at words. Walking to destinations is fun. You can walk to the park, the duck pond, the store, etc.
  • Bicycle Rides: Your baby should now be strong enough to sit in a seat on your bicycle or in a bicycle trailer. This is a fun activity to add to your outside time.
  • Park. Your child isn't old enough to run around the playground equipment, but she might enjoy swinging or having you help her down the slide. She also might enjoy people watching. If she can move, she will try to get to things. Keep her safe and be sure you don't let her try things beyond her physical ability.
  • Bubbles: Your baby might enjoy watching you blow bubbles. She might even chase after them.
  • Just Outside. You can spread a blanket out, bring some toys, and let your child sit and play. There will be much for your child to observe. If your child can move, she will like to move on her own outside. She might also enjoy passing a ball back and forth to you.
  • Hikes. If your family enjoys this, you can go for hikes.
  • Other. There are so many different outdoor activities you can introduce your child to. Swimming is one. Perhaps a trip to the corn maze. Maybe sledding.

Artistic Time
Baby might be able to do some artistic activities. Keep them age appropriate. This can range from possibly coloring to singing. See Baby Stuff I love: Art Time for ideas.

Discipline
Your need for discipline will vary on the baby. Some have basically no need yet. Others have a large need. Most likely fall somewhere in between. When Brayden was this age, I remember trying to think of what was okay with me and what wasn't. There was a lot that didn't bother me, but I decided to make the off-limits just so he could get the training in. With Kaitlyn, I already knew what was and wasn't okay with me so it didn't take much initial thought.

Remember that at this age, your child doesn't make moral decisions. Much discipline comes just because baby has no idea if something is or isn't okay to do. Other times, baby is simply trying to figure out life and is interested if things are always no, or if it was that one time. She also is trying to figure out what about that last time was no. She is trying to learn. See these posts for discipline ideas for this age range:

Other Goals
Here are a few posts for further ideas for goals in this age-range:

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More Than Making it Through the Day: 6-9 Months

This is a period that can be difficult for parents. It can be hard to think of things to do as baby starts to have longer waketime lengths. Baby might also start to show some need for discipline, which is new territory and parents aren't exactly sure how to go about it with a baby this young. During this age range, the book you will reference most is On Becoming Babywise II, though you might still need to turn to On Becoming Babywise at times. If you haven't read book two yet, now is the time! See this blog label for all of my thoughts on BW II: Babywise II

Let's break down the day to get ideas for activities and goals to work on so we aren't just going from morning to bedtime without making progress in life.

Mealtimes
This is the age range most people start solids for their baby. With this new addition comes many new rules for your little one. Take note that as your baby learns to eat from a spoon, mealtimes will get a lot longer. Baby may have nursed or downed the bottle in 10-20 minutes, but now he needs to eat solid food, and it takes him some time to figure this out.

During this period, make a goal of creating a good eater. Start good eating habits young. Also make it a goal to have proper mealtime manners during this time period. Your baby is old enough to learn how to do this.

Naptimes
Hopefully by this age, baby is able to self-soothe and naps are relatively smooth. This isn't to say all sleep problems are behind you forever, but hopefully they will be fewer and farther between. If your baby does have sleep problems during this period, see this post: 5-8 Month Sleep Disruptions. Also, you will likely run into Nap Disruptions: Rolling, Standing, Crawling, etc: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/nap-disruptions-rolling-standing.html

  • Nap Lengths: You want naps to be 1.5-2.5 hours long. If your baby is one who needs only a 1.5 hour nap, that is fine! This is nothing to worry about.
  • Down to Two: Most babies will go down to two naps in this age range. For most, this happens around 8 months old. Some, however, will not drop it until the next age range (like my Kaitlyn). Once the third nap is dropped, waketime increases, and often the length of the other two naps increase also. Instead, you might increase nighttime sleep if baby wasn't sleeping 12 hours. Decide what is best for your baby. See the blog label: dropping naps . See also:
    Dropping Naps: A Quick Reference
    Dropping the 3rd Nap (evening)
    In Action: Dropping the 3rd Nap
    Dropping a Nap: A Weaning Process
  • Waking Up Happy: Baby should start to wake up happy during the early part of this age range: Waking Up Happy
  • Heightened Awareness: Most babies are quite aware of their surroundings by this point and very interested in them. Baby might start waking at sleep transitions (see sleep transitions ). The waking appears to be due to a new awareness of surroundings. As your child transitions from RSP and ASP sleep, something wakes him. It can be something as simple as a door shutting. Many children don't want to miss out on the action. My son was this way. When he was 6-12 months, we were very cautious at the 45 minute mark during naps. We would be really quiet so we didn't wake him up. He now sleeps great once he is asleep. My daughter (almost 22 months) has always loved sleeping, so this hasn't been an issue for her. She has had her occasional nap disrupted by a barking dog or noisy brother, but 99% of the time she sleeps right through noise.
  • Mom, Not Baby, Decides: Keep it up! Please be sure to read this post for more on that: "Mom, not baby, decides..."
  • Vary Sleep Locations: If you haven't yet, you might want to start: Sleeping Tip: Vary Sleeping Locations

Now on to the activities to do during your waking hours. This is the information most of you are probably looking for.

Independent Playtime (Playpen Time)
I said this in the 0-6 month post (More Than Making it Through the Day: 0-6 Months ), but it is worthy of repeating. If there was one waketime activity principle I chose to take from Babywise, it would be Independent Playtime. I see it as the most valuable waketime activity to have. If you haven't yet started independent playtime with your child, start now. It is never too late. If you have, keep it up. See Word to the Weary: Independent Playtime Benefits if you need more convincing.

This is the age range when independent playtime starts to look more like you would imagine. It will most likely be in the playpen.

  • Proper Time Length: Here are the times to shoot for with your child based on her skills. 15-30 minutes twice a day for the independent sitter. 30-45 minutes at least once a day for the crawler. This is what you want to be at. If you aren't, make it a goal to get there. For more in-depth coverage on this, see Independent Playtime Lengths .
  • In Action: For a child in this age range, you essentially choose the best time of day (I find in the morning to usually be the best, but it can vary for your family. When it is twice a day, I would usually do in the morning and then in the evening-ish when I was fixing dinner). You put your child in the playpen with some toys. You don't want too many toys, but you also don't want too little. Rotate the toys on occasion so your child does not get bored. Your child should be alone (hence the independent). I put the playpen in a room where the child will be alone and not see me walking around. I don't mind them hearing me if that doesn't interfere with it all, but not see. You tell them to have fun, you love them, and good-bye. You might set a timer or you might just watch the clock. When time is over, you go in with a very happy face, ask if they had fun, and tell them it is time to clean up. You then clean up and encourage your child to help.

See this post for more on independent playtime: Independent Playtime. See this post if you are experiencing Resistance to Independent Playtime . With the longer waketime, you might also run into this at times: Falling Asleep During Independent Playtime.

Free Playtime
Free playtime can be in the presence of other family members. She can sit in her highchair and play with toys while you make dinner. Once she can sit up on her own well, you can give her a basket of toys on the floor to play with. See Free Playtime for more on this.

Sibling Playtime
If you have more than one child, you can have sibling playtime. You do not have to leave your children alone for this. When Kaitlyn was in this age-range, I still sat in on sibling playtime. Brayden never did anything questionable, but he was 2.5, which I felt was too young to be left alone with a 6-9 month old baby. There were times I would leave the room for a minute or two, but I was always within fast return to the children. Exactly what you do is up to you, your children, and the ages/maturity level of your older child/children.

This can be in a toy room, outside, and really you could have it be with something like a walk. At 6-9 months, your baby will love to spend time with the older sibling(s) each day. See this post for more on sibling playtime: Sibling Playtime. I wrote it when Kaitlyn was 10 months old.

One-on-One Time With Each Parent
Be sure that you have some time set aside each day for each parent to spend quality time with the baby. This can be in conjunction with other daily activities (reading, bathing, feeding solids, etc.) or it can be simply the parent playing with the baby. This is time when you are 100% baby's. In this age range, most fathers find it much easier to do this one-on-one time since baby is quite interactive. Many babies will even enjoy the natural "rough-ness" that Dad's bring to playing time.

One note, if you have this one-on-one time be another activity, be sure you are focused on baby. If it is during feeding solids, don't have the TV on, don't be talking on the phone, etc. You are spending time with baby.

Play Dates
You might start to have play dates every so often with other children. At this age, the baby will at most just watch the other child (don't expect much interaction), but it can be fun for your child to see that other children are out there, especially if this is your first.

Language Development
Believe it or not, this is the age range to start signing (if you haven't already). Your baby understands much more than you realize. Both of my children said their first words in this age range (though not all do). Your baby comprehends so much. There are some things you can do throughout the day to encourage language development. See this post for more: Language Development

  • Read. Read books to your child. We have story time routinely with our bedtime routine. You can also have other stories during the day if you want to. Non-BW: The Value of Reading: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/non-bw-value-of-reading.html
  • Avoid Baby Talk. Call words by their correct name. Pronounce the consonants in the word. Speak to your baby like she is a person who can understand you.
  • Talk. Speak to your child throughout the day.
  • Sing. Singing songs can be an interesting way for baby to hear words.
  • Sign. If you haven't already, start signing with your baby. This gives baby the ability to communicate. She can use her hands to communicate sooner than her mouth in most cases. Set goals in this. You can have a sign of the week at first. Eventually, you can introduce a new sign each day. See this post for much more: Sign Language

Bathtime
For my children, this age range is when bathtime gets to be a lot more fun. Remember that as your child gets older, you need to be mindful of times you need to correct behavior. Bathtime can bring opportunities. Your child will splash, and how much splashing is appropriate will depend on you. Your child might start to try to stand up toward the end of this stage. See these posts also:

Time Outside
Assuming the weather is good enough for your baby during this time period, spend time outside. Since your baby is now much more aware of what is going on around her, this will be a much more fascinating activity. There is so much for your baby to take in.

  • Walks. Take your baby for a walk. I remember that for some walks in this age range Brayden would spend the entire walk watching the wheels of the stroller. This seems boring and strange to me, but it was something new to him. He is also very mechanical, so it makes sense that he showed interest in this (Kaitlyn never has).
  • Park. Your child isn't old enough to run around the playground equipment, but she might enjoy swinging or having you help her down the slide. She also might enjoy people watching.
  • Just Outside. You can spread a blanket out, bring some toys, and let your child sit and play. There will be much for your child to observe.
  • Hikes. If your family enjoys this, you can go for hikes.
  • Other. There are so many different outdoor activities you can introduce your child to. Swimming is one. Perhaps a trip to the corn maze. Maybe sledding.

Toys
Your child will be much more interested in playing with toys in this age range. See these posts for guidance with that:

Singing
Your baby will really enjoy songs. You can sing or you can buy CDs to play. Your baby doesn't care about your skill level--he isn't an American Idol judge :). Sing those silly songs you have forgotten exhist (you can Google them to get the lyrics) like Wheels on the Bus, Itsy Bitsy Spider, etc.

Discipline
Now is the time to start.

  • Be proactive and directive. That means you address "issues" before they are issues and you you direct your child to do the right behavior rather than waiting to respond to a situation after your child starts it. A post on this topic is written and scheduled for next Monday. See page 57 in Babywise II for more.
  • Think things through. Think through the things your child could do during this age range that isn't appropriate. A lot of this will depend on your child's mobility. A crawler can get into more mischief than a non-crawler. Something all babies will do during this age is eat in a highchair. See posts below for ideas on what can go wrong and how to respond to them. Once you have your list (and it won't be complete; your baby will surprise you with ideas of her own), decide first how you can prevent them from happening. See proactive and directive above. Then make a list of ideas for how to respond when your baby tests that limit. Then when it happens, you will be prepared to respond to it. You will also be preventing it from happening, which avoids a lot of conflict. See Prevention.
  • Baby Highchair Manners: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/02/baby-highchair-manners.html
  • Baby-Proofing
  • BW II: Freedoms: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/babywise-ii-freedoms.html
  • Discipline: Progress is a Spiral
  • Teaching Your Baby "No": http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/teaching-your-baby-no.html
  • discipline

Other Goal Suggestions

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