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Reading to Toddlers

Last week, I wrote about Reading to Infants. Today I want to build on that and discuss some of the unique points of reading to toddlers. This post contains affiliate links. In the book The Read-Aloud Handbook, author Jim Trelease aptly says, "This stage is called 'labeling the environment.' " (page 53) If you have or have had a toddler, you know this is so true. Toddlers want to know what everything is called.

What to Read
Because toddlers like to label things, picture books of things are great for this age group. The books with just pictures that you can point at and name will hold a lot of interest for your child. Point at it as you read and label it. Ask your child, "Can you say ball?" and praise any effort your child gives to say ball. My toddlers have all loved looking at animal books, 

"This is a lion. Can you say lion?" Wait for response
"That's right! Lion. The lion says Roar! Can you say roar?" Wait for response
"Very good. Roar!"

As the child gets older, rather than introducing the animal or object first, you just ask, "What is this?" as you point. Then go on, "That's right! It is a lion. What does the lion say?" If you are looking at a page with a lot of objects, you can say, "Where is the ball? Can you touch the ball?" I know a lot of our time reading books with the toddlers is spent just labeling objects and not so much reading the "story" written in the book if there is a story, especially with the more 14-30ish month age range.

Some of my favorite books for this age range are:
When my children have been close to 18 months old, I have made them a "quiet book." These are books I have either scrapbooked the "old fashioned way" or printed off digitally. For Brinley, I made the books with Shutterfly and that was very easy. Here are some samples:
This has been a favorite book for all of my children.

As your child goes from about 2.5 up to 3--so approaching preschooler age--your child will start to have more of an interest in books with a simple story line attached to it. Read books that are of interest to your child. If your child loves animals, find animal books. If your child loves trucks, find truck books. Here are some we have liked:

Read the Book Over and Over (and over) Again
"Prior to age two, repeated readings of fewer books is better than a huge collection read infrequently" (page 54). When my first two children were in this age range, we really did not have a vast collection of books to read from. We had 10-20 books total that we read from. Brayden and Kaitlyn are now 10 and 8 and their reading scores are off the charts. 

I remember reading those books over and over. I can still read any one of those books without actually reading the words when I read them to Brinley. They are burned on the back of my eyelids--I know the stories that well. As a two year old, Brayden could "read" a longer Clifford story himself with out mistakes because he had it memorized. I know it can be as boring as can be to read the same thing over and over, but do it anyway. Children are learning a whole entire language. It will take them time and repetition to pick up on things from books. Repeat, repeat, repeat. And don't feel like you need a huge library. Choose some high quality books to own and be content with that. Every once in a while, you can go to the library and expand the book pool, but don't feel like you have to. 

Answer Questions
"Don't destroy natural curiosity by ignoring it" (page 55). While we have the saying, "There is no such thing as a dumb question," we adults don't often treat questions with much patience or kindness. Reward curiosity! All children are curious. Asking questions is a sign of intelligence. Foster that. 

At the end of the book, you can answer any questions your child may have. If a question is pertinent to understanding the story, answer it immediately. If the question is better discussed at the end of the book, tell your child you will come back to it once the story is done and then do so. 

Rhyming Books are Still Important
Rhythm and rhyme are good for infants, and the same is true for toddlers. Again, go for simple plot lines starting about age 2.5. Predictable rhyming books are great ("I do not like them, Sam I Am!"). 

Read as Much as You Can
When Brayden was young, I was pregnant a lot. I got pregnant when he was six months old. I lost that baby when he was 11 months old and I got pregnant again at 13 months old. I was tired and sick. He was a busy little boy like boys are. I loved books because he would be willing to sit still so I could read to him. We read a lot. 

Have Patience
Not all children will just naturally love to sit and read books. If your child is like that, work on it over time. Sense when you should push sitting still and when you should just be content with letting your child listen as you read and the child plays nearby. 

When, Where, and How to Read
Have a consistent time of day that you will read no matter what, but fit in more time when you can. We read before nap and before bedtime each day. We will then add in other times some times. 

We read in a certain spot each time. Brinley used to have a chair in her room that we sat in, but we removed it to trade it for a doll house. I now just sit on the floor. You could read on the couch in the family room. You can consider reading in the bed if it is a toddler bed, but I like reading, ending, and then going to bed. I used to read to Brayden in his bed and it made for 60-90 minute reading sessions. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, but not a practical thing day to day. 

Read with enthusiasm--don't be grumpy about it. Read clearly and slowly enough for your child to understand what you are saying. Talk about pictures. Have some interest in your voice--don't be monotone. 








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Reading to Infants


Kaitlyn at 11 months old at the end of independent playtime
I am a huge advocate of reading to your children. Reading to your infant or toddler is not about trying to create a genius of a baby. This post contains affiliate links. It is about helping your child reach her own innate potential (see The Read-Aloud Handbook, page 50). Despite the recent story that reading to children gives them an unfair advantage (just don't even get me started on that idea), I continue to fully support and encourage parents reading to their children daily. Rather than telling parents who read to their children that they should occasionally feel guilty about the unfair advantage they are bestowing on their children, let's encourage parents who aren't reading to their children to do so. 

"Children hearing the most language will have the best chance of having the best language skills" (The Read-Aloud Handbook, page 50). I would love to see all children given this chance and opportunity to reach their full potential. It isn't about being "better" than others; it is about being the best version of themselves. 

Keep in mind that "...attention spans are not built overnight--they are built minute by minute, page by page, day by day" (The Read-Aloud Handbook, page 52). And by the way, that is a fantastic thing to keep in mind for all sorts of parenting activities and issues from discipline to chores.

For me in this age range, a huge part of why I read to these young ages is to start a habit and to foster a love for books. I want my children to have positive associations with reading and books, so always keep that in mind as you are reading to your little ones. 

Birth to 4 Months
What you read to this age group is not important. It just matters that you are reading (The Read-Aloud Handbook, page 49). With my little ones, I read books geared toward babies, but you could read the newspaper. You could read aloud a book you are interested in. You could read aloud your scriptures. Just read out loud. 

These young babies can't move on their own, so really your baby has no choice but to listen. I like to read with baby on my lap, but if your baby gets squirmy and upset, go ahead and put baby on the floor and read. You could read during tummy time or while baby was at the gym. You could lay on your backs next to each other while you hold the book above you.

4-9 Months
Again, go for your number one goal to be that you hold your baby while reading. Don't restrict your baby, but cuddle your baby.

Around 4 months old, babies start to have an interest in toys. By 6 months old, your baby will want to grab the book. A great idea is to let your baby hold a toy to chew on so the book doesn't become a battle. A wise thing for these younger ones is to read board books rather than books with pages that can be ripped when those cute pudgy fingers grab hold of them. Sometimes you can even give baby a different book to hold while you read a book. 

As your baby gets holder, he will want to be the one to turn pages, and he obviously will not know when to turn pages. This often starts up around 8 months old. Remember the idea of Substitution. It can be helpful to give baby a different book to turn pages in. Let baby have books in independent play so he can turn and turn pages to his hearts content. Try to maintain control over the reading experience and turning the pages when it is time. You can gently say, "Oh! Not yet. We will turn the page in just a minute." Then allow your child to turn when it is time. But do maintain it as an enjoyable experience; sometimes you will allow your child to turn pages before the page is done, and that is okay. Do keep in mind that self-control is valuable, though: 
Look for books that:
  • Have colorful pictures
  • Have exciting sounds in the words
  • Have a rhythmic beat
  • Rhyme (Mother Goose and Dr. Seuss are excellent)
  • Are short
10-12 Months
During these months, the child will grow more and more interested in helping turn pages. The child will also grow more and more interested in the book. You can start asking your child to point to certain things. You can point at things and ask, "What is that?" or "What sound does a pig make?" Of course, you will have needed to introduced those things before asking your child to answer those questions. Your child will start by mimicking the things you teach and will progress to being able to answer questions.

More from the Read Aloud Handbook:

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Structured Playtime With Siblings {Sibling Playtime}

I first read about the idea of Structured Playtime with Siblings in On Becoming Toddlerwise (page 49). There isn't a lot of explanation on it--it is pretty simple and straightforward. It is simply a structured time when siblings play with each other.

The structured is the key thing to pay attention to here and I think it is important. Structured Playtime is talked about on that same page (page 49). Structured Playtime in short means that mom decides what activity is done. Free Playtime means the child decides. In structured playtime, mom sets the rules.

As children get older, you can allow them more freedom in choosing what to do. Sibling Playtime can be Free Playtime with Siblings. There is a  lot of creativity and fun that happens when siblings are allowed to play creatively. It is important to maintain a certain amount of structure whether it is "free" or "structured." 

Structure the Time Slot
You, being the wise adult that you are, get to decide when the playtime happens in the day. Childrn play best together when they are well rested and fed. Keep that in mind as you decide what times of day to have sibling playtime happen. 

Now, with my children being older, I don't even always structure the time slot. My older two children are at school Monday through Friday. On Saturday, they typically like to start off the day playing together. And they have grown to know themselves well enough that they know when it seems to be a good time to break apart for some independent play. But if one morning someone wakes up feeling grumpy and needs to be alone first, I have no problem with Independent Play happening first. 

So with younger children involved, structure the time slot. As your children get older, it is perfectly acceptable to allow them to give input on order of activities. 

Structure the Location
Location is something I think is very important no matter the age. As your child gets older, boundaries will grow, but they must still be present. Have a clear boundary of where you children may play and where your children may not play.

When Brayden and Kaitlyn were young (2 and younger than 1), sibling playtime happened in a bedroom. That was their boundary. As they got older, it expanded to include almost one entire floor of our house--everything but McKenna's room because that is where she was sleeping as a baby. 

We have boundaries for playing in our home. I don't allow toys on the main floor of my house. It doesn't mean they never ever make their appearance. Toys often trickle along when a child is headed to a meal or something, but I send the toys back with them.

I don't allow art stuff to leave the main floor of my home. This way, I ensure things don't A)Get strewn about the house and hard to find when wanted later and B)land in the hands of little toddlers who don't understand where it is and isn't appropriate to express themselves artistically. 

A very important place to have boundaries is when your children are outside. Make it clear where they are allowed to go and where they are not allowed to go. Unsupervised toddlers and preschoolers will likely wander to neighbor's yards and inadvertently destroy decorations or trample flower gardens. They don't know that they shouldn't pull apart your neighbor's wreath, and because of that, they shouldn't be allowed to wander where they want to without adult supervision. 

Another side to the importance of outside boundaries is the safety of your child. The state of your neighbor's wreath is very trivial in comparison to the state of your child's body. 

If your child refuses to stay where you instruct your child to stay, it is time to look at what freedoms you allow throughout the day. I have written extensively on this so see: 
Sample Activities
You might also want to structure the activities done. You don't always have to, and you don't always have to be specific. You can do a general "play outside" and let them decide what is played outside. Sometimes you might give a specific, "go ride your bikes outside." You might alternate who gets to decide what the activity is. There is no list of "yes okay" and "not okay" for sibling playtime. Here are some ideas:
  • Playing with toys (dress up, little people, stuffed animals, kitchen, etc.)
  • Playing board games
  • Playing with play doh
  • Drawing, coloring, or other art
  • Playing outside--swinging, playing on trampoline, playing in sandbox, running through sprinklers, building snowmen, riding bikes...
Why?
You may be wondering why have Sibling Playtime--or at least in a structured way. I know my children have learned to get along with each other and have grown to be great friends from playing with each other. When the children know they will be playing with each other and that they are expected to work it out among themselves, they often will work to make the dynamics of playing work. Playing with others helps children learn social skills and how to compromise. 

Structured play teaches "...the child...that he doesn't get to always be the one to choose" (Toddlerwise 49). Knowing this and accepting this helps children to learn to compromise and get along with others. It is also very helpful when it comes time for school. Whether you plan to send your child to school or homeschool, your child will need to accept doing things when the teacher tells him to do it. This is a skill that is important throughout life. Sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do.
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Value Learning

In this post, guest blogger Becca perfectly explains the purpose for having some structured learning in your day while laying out some simple steps to make it happen. Becca has a great blog full of ideas for structured learning. Visit: http://engagingtoddleractivities.wordpress.com/ to check it out!

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How many of us have watched in amazement at what our little ones are capable of learning in an astoundingly short amount of time?  Plain and simple, our kids are geniuses.  They’re soaking up knowledge all day whether reading at the library or playing in the dirt.  They absorb everything and never seem to reach a maximum retention level.  I’m guessing you’re all nodding your heads in agreement.

It’s not just mental development either.  I’m amazed at how quickly their motor skills progress.  Think about it, it wasn’t too long ago they were waking themselves up from that precious nap because somebody whacked them in the nose.  Isn’t it impressive how quickly they move from wildly roaming appendages to detailed, fine motor skills?  High fives, dialing a phone, digging for candy in your purse, picking their noses, how fast they learn!

So why structure learning activities into their day when learning is taking place naturally?  I think that’s the most prevalent question we hear when it comes to learning activities.

  • Without direction, their information absorption is haphazard and inefficient.  There’s little order to it, making it difficult for them to successfully build upon their knowledge over time.  There will come a point where frustration takes hold.  As a teacher I saw this repeatedly, students who rely on memorization to succeed.  They’ve never learned to process information.  They struggle immensely with higher order thinking skills.  We can begin that process even with our toddlers.
  • We teach them how to learn.  We don’t leave them to learn on their own. We can provide our little ones with order and direction so that knowledge means something, so they build upon it efficiently, so frustration is held at bay and they can remain engaged when learning whether at age 3, 10 or 20.  As in every other area of their lives, we have so much to offer them.  And it’s not hard to accomplish.

    Pushing that car down the hallway for the millionth time today does include aspects of learning for any 20 month old.  BUT, arranging a road with dips and valleys or turns and stop signs gives further direction to their play.  They still have a blast, but their gross motor skills, fine motor skills, spatial understanding, and life skills are now being encouraged far more than before.  We have offered them a greater opportunity to develop.  Sit down with them and engage in active conversation as you play together and you’ve now provided help processing the new experience.  They begin to learn directional words like left and right or the purpose of a stop sign, patience while one car waits so another can pass and even social skills.  Simply verbalizing all these things brings order to the play, helps their brains process more quickly and as a bonus, adds more fun to their play.  In my opinion that’s a learning activity.  You’ve just created a learning experience to meet the needs of your child.
  • We replace simple facts with useful knowledge that can be built upon as they grow.  We don’t have to sit our 2 year olds down and fill their brains with every element in the periodic chart.  It’s not a race.  And as much as we adore showing our kids off, we’re not doing this for bragging rights.  Having a one year old that can name and locate all 50 states and their capitols isn’t really necessary (though if my son could do that, I’d certainly provide him plenty of opportunities to show that off).  What about knowing their address, their city and state, a basic understanding of the world around them and their place in it? 
  • It all starts with knowing the purpose behind each learning experience.  But how do we do this? Is this going to be feasible in our schedules?  How do we know what to teach?  With pre-toddlers and toddlers, learning activities begin by simply directing their play in a way that will most benefit their needs.
  1. Create a list of realistic goals for your child’s age and development.  To simplify mine, I made categories for different types of learning: spiritual, physical, behavioral and educational.  Think about their strengths and weaknesses.  Do you notice they need some extra help with their pinching muscles?  Incorporate fine motor activities into your little one’s day to encourage practice.  Do they need work on patience and remaining still?  Organize a craft to complete at the table or have them join you in reading a book on the couch.  Look at what they are naturally interested in and work with that.  Are they starting to recognize a few letters?  Help them organize what they are learning by working through the alphabet and sounds with crafts or games.
  2.  Keep the list short and simple.  This helps me remain confident that I am working up my son’s funnel (to use a BW term) rather than jumping up and down sporadically.  Keeping it short and sweet helps me to focus and to not become overwhelmed so that I end up giving up before I begin.  Having that quick list in the back of my head also helps me to better recognize opportunities that I can capitalize on in the spur of the moment.
  3. Take the first item on the list and create a learning activity to accomplish that particular goal.  Remember our kids don’t need bells and whistles.  Well, truthfully they LOVE bells and whistles but you know what I mean.  Don’t feel like you have to compete for most creative parent.  Your 3 year old isn’t comparing the activities her mom is doing with what the internet moms are posting.  The only award we’re seeking is our little one engaged and learning.  Sorting stickers or counting goldfish will accomplish both as much as an elaborate homemade game that took hours of prep for mom or dad.
  4. Plan the activity into your day so that you’ll follow through.  It’s so easy to have great intentions yet get distracted by busyness, chores, discipline, meals, errands, work,…   I have found that deciding when I will complete the learning activity dramatically increases the likelihood that it will actually be completed.

All of these steps can be completed within 20-30 minutes.  That’s a very short amount of time to help us become proactive in our children’s learning.  As you make this part of your routine, learning activities will become easier for you to implement.  You’ll find creativity strikes while walking through the grocery store or folding laundry and suddenly think of a great way to teach one of the goals on your list.  You will also find that it is all definitely worth the effort. 

Learning activities don’t hinder a child’s creativity.  They don’t keep our kids from enjoying childhood.  We’re not shooting for Harvard graduates by the age of ten.  We’re simply teaching them to how to learn, a skill that will follow them the rest of their lives.

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Literacy: Books on Tape/CD

Here is our latest guest post from Susanne. Thanks Susanne!

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I am huge advocate for allowing children to listen to books on tape and CD. There are many benefits that arise from allowing your children to enjoy a book on tape.

Benefits:
  • Exposed to vocabulary that is not regularly used at home or at school.
  • Are able to hear the intonation and dramatization of stories. This helps children to understand how one should read with expression. Reading with expression helps children to build meaning and comprehension while reading.
  • For older children who struggle to read, books on tape open a door to reading that allows them to develop vocabulary at or above their level.
  • If listening to a book on tape is accompanied with the actual book, children can follow along. This allows them to read words they cannot read on their own. It also allows your child independence to interact with a story without an adult.
  • It helps them to develop good listening skills- essential for later success in school.

When are good times to use a book on tape/ CD?

  • In the car: Your children are captive at this time. You can all listen to the book on tape together. Occasionally stop the tape and ask them questions about what they have heard. This creates good discussion and helps them to develop great reading skills for later in life.
  • During quite time/ structure learning time: You can rent books at the library in the children’s section that come with a book. You can let your pre-schooler listen and follow along on the tape. Than afterwards, have them draw a picture in a journal about what they read. If they can write, you can always have them write something they liked in the story. You can also have them dictate to you what they like or a description about their picture if they cannot write yet.
  • Before Bed: Children are most vulnerable at night. They are most often more willing to let their defenses down and talk. As a family you could listen to a part of book on take. Than have a family discussion about what you just heard. If the parent shows interest in the book, your child will learn to show interest and enter into a discussion too.

Questions to ask your child during and after listening to a book on tape/ CD

  • Predictions- before listening to the story or pause the tape and ask, “what do you think will happen next in the story” or “what do you think will happen in this story..” Make sure you model and show them how to make predictions yourself so they understand what you are asking them to do.
  • Connections- before or after reading the story, ask them if the story reminded them of anything? For instance, if the story had a dog, you could say, “the dog in the story reminded me of how our dog Max always chases cats.” Or if the story was about a boy who went to a baseball game, you could discuss the time your family went to the baseball game and how it was similar and different.
  • Why- you can ask your children why questions. For instance you could ask a question such as, “Why do you think Henry lied to his mom?” This brings up some good discussion!
  • Did you like it?- Ask your child if he or she liked the story. Make sure to have them explain why they liked it. They should use at least one example to support their reason. For instance, “I liked this story because I like ponies” (ponies were in the story). Or, “I liked the story because the kids get to go the beach. I liked it when we went to the beach this summer.”
  • Summarize- at the end of the story have your child tell you what the story was about. There should be a beginning, a middle, and an end to the retell of the story.

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Blanket Time Info

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As you read through the various -wise books, it is very easy to miss the information on blanket time. I missed it the first couple of times I read through Toddlerwise, and then I had a hard time finding information on it when I tried to.

In On Becoming Toddlerwise, blanket time is mentioned on pages 45 and 48. Page 45 says for toddlers between ages 14-18 months to do time on a blanket 2-3 times a week for 10-15 minutes at a time. The purpose of this is to teach parameter skills. Page 48 says for toddlers between ages 14-20 months to do it in the place of roomtime at first, starting with 5 minutes at a time each day. You then work up to 30 minutes or longer.

So what does that mean for you? I know several moms who start blanket time well before 14 months old. I know some who never use it at all. The age you start it would really depend on your child. You can put a completely immobile 8 month old on a blanket to play, but if he can't move anywhere it isn't true blanket time. That doesn't mean you can't start doing it--it can be useful to teach the habit before he has the option of moving, but he isn't exercising any sort of personal restraint by staying on the blanket when he couldn't move off of it in the first place.

Ultimately, here is my take on blanket time. Blanket time is not something well defined in the -wise books. I say you take blanket time and make it what you see your toddler in need of. Does your toddler need help learning boundaries? Does he lack some focusing skills? Do you have a need for blanket time in situations such as church? Use blanket time as needed in your home. Personally, I like the use of blanket time as a time to teach parameter skills. I consider it a a structured playtime situation. Again, use blanket time as you see fit for your child and your family's situation.

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Structured Playtime

There is some confusion as the the distinction between each of the playtimes described in the -wise series. This article discusses Structured Playtime. Structured playtime as defined in On Becoming Babywse II (page 71) is simply independent playtime where mom chooses the toys played with and the time it is done.

In On Becoming Toddlerwise (page 49), it progresses. Mommy picks the activity and the time it happens. This is a good skill because the child needs to learn that he can't always choose the activity. Once your child gets to school, he will have very little freedom about what he does and when he does it. Structured Playtime can be playing puzzles or coloring. It can really be any activity. I would choose an activity that is going to require some concentration and focus. I believe this can be something done in teh presence of others. Perhaps you are making dinner while your child colors at the kitchen table. You can also have all of your children color together. You can have your children play in the yard together. You can overlap structured playtime and sibling playtime. When you instruct your children to play with each other, they can develop important social skills. If your child is resistent to structured playtime, you can start with short increments of time and work up--using a timer.

In On Becoming Preschoolwise (page 97), the rules for structured playtime are the same as in Toddlerwise. Mom chooses the activity and the location of the activity.

I view this activity much like free playtime. It is a good activity for you to turn to when making dinner or other chores. It is good practice time for preschool and on.

See these posts for more on other playtime activities:
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Independent Playtime Lengths

Independent Playtime Lengths: The amount of time you can expect your child to play alone each day

Independent playtime is when your child plays alone, independently, for a period of time in the day. There are many, many benefits to independent play, not only for your child, but for you also.

Independent Playtime Lengths: The amount of time you can expect your child to play alone each day

Appropriate Independent Playtime Lengths

People often wonder how long their child can be expected to play alone based on the age of the child. The best length is going to depend on your overall schedule, age, and the length of waketime. Here is a summary from On Becoming Babywise II (affiliate link):
  • 5-10 minutes once or twice a day for the young newborn (my own personal addition)
  • 10-20 minutes twice a day for first few months
  • 15-30 minutes twice a day for the independent sitter
  • 30-45 minutes at least once a day for the crawler
  • Up to 60 minutes for the 15-20 month old in playpen or room
  • 60-90 minutes for 18 months and older in the room
It also says these are guidelines. Some days may be longer, some shorter. For example, say it is Saturday and you have a family thing to get to. You can have a shorter than usually independent play so you can get to your family thing on time.

You also don't want to overuse it (read abuse it) and turn it into an all day thing. You also want it to be long enough for your child.

As a note, I did independent play with Brayden only once a day because he didn't love it. With Kaitlyn, we do it twice because she has always loved it. My other two daughters loved it, also.

Brayden now loves it, and has since it became roomtime instead of playpen time. At nearly 3, he plays for 1-1.5 (usually 1.5) hours once a day. At 11 months, Kaitlyn does it twice a day. Her morning playtime is 20-30 minutes, depending on the amount of time before her nap. Her afternoon playtime is 40-45 minutes. She never complains about it, but I get her because I figure that is long enough for her at her age.

Related Posts on Independent Playtime:

On Becoming Babywise Book Two
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