How to Establish Safe Media Standards For Your Family

As I sat listening to the older, seasoned women in the room talk, I came to the horrifying realization that we were alone. My generation of parents were the pioneers in learning how to parent children in the digital-crazed, media-filled modern day. On most parenting topics, we can turn to people who have been there, done that. Even if the world is a bit different, we can glean wisdom because the basic problems faced are the same.

But the digital world has changed that.

We don't have previous wisdom to tell us what age is wise to allow a child to get a cell phone. We don't have data to show the impact of too much social media, or even too little media. I mean, we are living in a digital world; will children be able to grow to be adults who can function in society if they are simply banned from digital media throughout their childhood?

That horrifying realization was about ten years ago. We knew very little then. We could postulate and hypothesize. We did not know for sure, though.

Ten years is a long time, and we now have some evidence of what media is doing to our world. We are starting to have young adults come into society having a hard time interacting face to face; they are used to interacting over things text and SnapChat. Granted not all early 20-somethings are that way, but it is prevalent in society.

The concern goes beyond concern for social skills, however. It goes deeper than that. It goes to concern for moral skills. 

When children and teenagers (and even adults!) have the Internet at their fingertips 24 hours a day, they do more than surf and chat with friends. Many times, they chat with strangers and end up in morally compromising situations. Many times, they find themselves caught up in pornography. 

So how do we protect our children from this pitfall?

Remember when I said even if the world is different, we can glean wisdom from those who have gone before us? Even in facing the digital unknown, we can apply that principle.

What are some core values we can look to? What can we do with our children even from a young age to help protect them against media pitfalls down the road? How can we possibly manage this without years of wisdom to guide us? Here are some ideas.

1-You are the parent, and therefore in charge

Always keep this in mind. You are the parent, so you are the one in charge. That means you get to set the rules. That means you get to set the limits. That means you get to set the limitations. Keep this in mind from the time your child is young and on up. Your child has one set of parents, but many friends. Do not neglect the parenting role in order to try to fill the friend role. Have the Courage to Be a Parent.  See also:

• Leadership and Authority
• Parent vs. Friend

2-Start as you mean to go on

Start as you mean to go on. We talk about this with sleeping and with simple discipline rules. Do the same thing with your media and technology rules. Do not start something with a toddler or preschooler that you don't want happening with a teenager. Always keep prevention in mind. It is easier to prevent problems than to fix problems. Now, this doesn't mean you can't ever change a rule or update a rule. Just be aware of habits you are allowing to form and precedents you are setting and be sure they are habits you are okay with. 

3-Limit the amount of time your child is using technology

Keep your child plugged into the world around her. Do not let her only interact with the online world. Have her interact with the people around her, also. It is okay for you to have a time limit on how much technology can be consumed in a day. It is okay to just not allow any technology on certain days. I have a friend who doesn't allow any television or video games at all except on Saturdays. We do a three hour video game limit per week at our house. There are a lot of ways you can go, and there isn't one right way for every family or for every season. If the precedent is that there are limitations, then even when the limitations change, your child will understand that limitations exist in your home. For more on this topic, see Balancing Technology and also Digital Overload and What to Do About It.

With that said, technology is part of life. Do not try to just banish it from your family's life. You want to teach your children to learn to manage it. Help them learn to use technology for their own good and for helping others. What you want to avoid is your child letting technology use them. 

4-Keep technology off at certain times

Today we have smartphones and tablets. When I was a kid, it was the television. While we have 24 hour finger access to technology, the idea of technology infiltrating the home is not new. Having the phone ring on the wall isn't that different from your phone beeping to alert you of a text. What is the wisdom from those who came before us?

Have times when technology is not turned to. Have family dinner without interruptions from the television, Facebook, or texting. Choose other times to just have the phones and devices put away. Make a policy. Make it a tradition. Make it what you do. Do it now so it is just the way it is when your children are teenagers. 

5-Do not allow electronics to be taken into the bedroom

When my children are second graders and really grow into being avid readers, I get them a Kindle Fire  (affiliate link) for Christmas. The perk of the Fire is that you can watch movies on it and play games on it, which is great if you are going on a long car ride and don't have a TV in your car. 

As my children got older, however, I became increasingly uncomfortable with them taking the Internet to their bedroom each night. They were reading books, but as they got older, the possibility of them using the Internet and having something pop up became more and more of a concern. They say that it is not a matter of IF your child will see something in appropriate on the Internet, but WHEN. I don't want that when to be in their bedroom alone at night. 

Computers are not new to the world, and a long-standing piece of advice for families has been to put the computer in a common area in the home so that people can not use it privately. That is the wisdom I have to look at from those who came before me. Keeping that same idea, it made no sense to send the Internet into my child's bed each night.

With that realization, I literally purchased (affiliate link)  Kindle Paperwhites for Brayden and Kaitlyn the next day. I don't love spending money, especially when I basically already have the item. They both had Fires already. They read on their Fires. But the cost was low in my mind. I got them each a Paper White without the special offers. I didn't want them getting advertising. They are not allowed to take the Fire into their bedrooms. They can take their Paperwhite with them to bed to read at night.

I know a lot of families have a common charging station in the kitchen or other public area. Everyone plugs their phones and other devices in at the charging station each night. That way you can be sure

devices are not being taken to the bedroom.

6-Always have a policy that you can check any device, any time

Make a habit to check devices. Monitor what has been going on with the device. What texts have been made, what phone calls have been made, what websites have been visited? Now, sadly the world of technology changes constantly and apps are created to be able to do things untracked. That leads us to...

7-Stay aware of trends

It is wise for you to find someone to follow who is on the up and up with technology. Unless you are an expert, you won't be able to keep up. Find people you can follow who will keep up for you. Two ideas for you are Common Sense Media or The Cyber Safety Lady. Remember, technology changes more often than you changed your clothes when you had a newborn. You have to choose to be aware. What is the latest app being used? Be friends with your child on any social media site she is on. You might even require that you have the password as well. 

8-Be an example

Parental example is always the first place a child looks to learn about life. Be an example of wise media use. Do not let your phone rule your life. Interact with your child and not your phone. Let that text message wait until after dinner. Resist the urge to pull the phone out every time you are bored. For young children, your example is the most profound teacher in life. 

Conclusion

Enough time has now passed that we do have parents to look to with advice for technology and students. We don't have to fly blind. We also can look at basic standards that have stood the test of time and apply them to our families and technology use. We don't have to navigate this blindly, and we don't need to be horrified at the task before us. We can do it if we only try!

See also:

Baby Monitors {Plus a Giveaway!}

“This giveaway is a partnership with Nakturnal, with a prize of a gift certificate”

When Brayden was a baby, we lived in a small space with no bedrooms. When he was about six months old, I finally had the bright idea to put him in the large bathroom to sleep so that our open concept house didn't go on lockdown every time he had a nap. It was all one floor and a small space overall, so the next part is comical. I used a baby monitor. Yep. I was never more than 50 steps away from him, but I felt compelled to use a baby monitor so I could hear every deep breath he took. And of course you know if I was using a baby monitor, it was up as loudly as it could go. Clearly I love baby monitors.

My love for baby monitors has not diminished over the years. As our family has grown, we have moved into larger homes, and the home we are currently in actually warrants a baby monitor. If my baby cried, I wouldn't be able to hear my baby without the monitor. 

A baby monitor definitely is a double-edged sword. When you can hear every breath your child makes, then you probably aren't sleeping as well as you could, and your baby likely isn't, either. For example, when Brayden was a baby, I prided myself on being at his side the second he made a peep in the night. I am a very light sleeper, and I have found being a mother with a newborn only makes me more light. 

As more babies came my way, I came to realize that babies make noise while sleeping. Lots of noise. While sleeping. This means that many times, those peeps were made while asleep. I learned with my girls to wait a bit before jumping to pick them up. I would wait and make sure they were actually awake and not just making noise in their sleep. So having a baby monitor can lead you to reacting too fast to every noise your child makes. 

As time went on, new things came to be common for the nursery list. Among those was the video monitor. If the baby monitor was something to magnify sounds, the video monitor added a whole new dimension to the parenting picture. I came to realize things. Things like, times where I thought a baby had quietly drifted to sleep and then woke 20 minutes later crying were actually times the baby was awake for 20 minutes before crying. That is a game changer because it changes how you approach waketime in the future. One way means waketime was too long, the other means it was too short. That is helpful and vital information! 

It also helped me know with Brinley, my fourth baby, that often she cried in her sleep, even as an older baby. She didn't just do that as a newborn. She did it as a "veteran" baby. Now, I had been around the parenting block enough times to know to not rush in right away, but the video monitor helped me know to not rush in at all. She was still asleep. She would cry for a couple of minutes and then quietly continue sleeping. 

Some people like to stop using monitors as soon as baby consistently sleeps through the night, which isn't necessarily a bad idea. It will probably leave you sleeping better at night. But like I said, I like baby monitors. Brinley still has both her sound baby monitor and her video monitor in her bedroom. If you worry about removing the monitor all together, you can always turn it way down. And I get it! Monitors can disrupt your sleep.

When McKenna was a baby, I had to put the monitor as far across the room from me as possible, on the lowest volume setting, covered by a pillow, and I slept with ear plugs. I still heard her just fine. My husband never heard her before I did. So I get the trouble monitors can cause with sleep. If you live in a home with a setup where you can ditch the monitor, it can definitely be helpful to your sleep!

By the way, let me throw  plug in for the baby monitor we use for Brinley. It is a VTech Safe & Sound Digital Audio Monitor. It still works as well as it did the first day we got it (four years ago). Also, something very helpful for me is that it doesn't send every peep over the monitor. It waits until the sound is consistent. So you don't hear unless your baby is really, actually crying. Fabulous. 

I have come a long way since my days of using a baby monitor basically needlessly. Despite any sleep I may have lost with the monitor use, it has been instrumental in me recognizing patterns and deciphering cries for my babies. It has helped me get to know them faster and address their needs with more accuracy. So I am a big believer. 

For fun today, we have a giveaway! The prize is a $50 USD gift card! You can use that $50 to buy a monitor or something else you need for your baby. 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Entry Rules

• You must enter the giveaway to have an entry.
• You must fulfill the requirement to enter. Commenting on this post is mandatory.
• Entries will be accepted until 12:00 AM October 7, 2016.
• The winner will be randomly selected through Rafflecopter.
• The winner will be announced sometime after the winner is chosen. I will email the winner.
• Once the winner is announced, you will have one week to contact me or another winner will be chosen. Be sure to check back and/or check your email. The only thing worse than not winning is to win but not realize it in time.
• I will not use your email address for any purpose other than contacting you if you are the winner (and FYI, I don't have access to the email addresses except for the winner).

3 things you may not know about car seat safety {Guest Post}

by Emily Parker

Car seats are vital to keeping our children safe in the car. The tough things is that things are constantly changing...including our kids! Even people who strive to be "on top of" all things car seat safety can miss something along the way. It's important to be vigilant in keeping our children safe while riding in the car...from birth till adulthood let's do all we can to protect them! 

I've written posts in the past about car seat safety but felt lead to write on this topic again because I've noticed a trend of three things that parents are often not being mindful of when it comes to car seats!
As a refresher be sure to read over this post on car seat safety and this one on car seat safety beyond age 2. 

Even with all the information I included in the posts above, here are three things you still may not know about car seat safety:

1. Do Not Add ANYTHING To Your Car Seat: I had a friend post on this recently and it's something that is very, very important. Yes. Baby stores sell TONS of cute little things you can put on your baby's or child's seat. Strap covers that are soft and cuddly. Cushions to give them extra comfort. Just because a store sells it does not make it safe. Adding things to your child's seat not only causes a safety concern but will actually void your manufacturers warranty with your car seat. So in the event that an accident does occur with the seat, the company won't be helping you out. This is an excellent post with more information about the importance of avoiding "extras" with your car seat!

2. Read and Re-Read Your Manual: Every single car seat on the market is unique in it's own way. Even different production years of the same model of car seat vary. It is VITAL to not only read through your seat's entire manual when you purchase the seat, but also to re-read through it on a regular basis. As your child grows, the seat has to change to still be safe for your child. I learned this with my first child. I never thought to check the car seat manual and at a couple months old I still had the newborn insert in the seat that was supposed to be removed by 11 pounds! It was a rookie mistake but one I've been mindful of not to make again. I constantly see pictures of kids on social media who are in the correct seat for their height/weight/age but they are not in it correctly. A top quality seat still can't protect your child if it's not being used the way it's meant to be used. Each seat has different specifications for the strap locations, headrest locations, tilt of seat, even how to latch the seat into the car. All of these things change as your child changes so it's imperative to stay current with it!  My son is 48" tall and his seat can only use the harness up until 50 inches. I am aware of this and know by his 8th birthday he'll probably need to convert to the high-back booster. It didn't surprise me to read this when I read over his manual last week...but what did surprise me was that at 50 lbs we have to use both the latch and the seat belt system to install the seat. He's right at 50 lbs so it's important that we make sure we have it installed correctly! Even the smallest things make a big difference in keeping your child safe.

3. Recognize The Importance of the Word AND: And is a much different word that Or. Many people look at car seat safety guidelines and replace the word AND for the word OR. Back when the recommendation for forward facing was 1 years old AND 20 lbs often people would say "oh I can turn my kid forward on their first birthday!" and never look at the rest of the recommendation. This happens often with car seats. I see all the time people saying "my child is two so they can forward face!" when in reality the rule of thumb is age 2 AND the max height/weight your seat allows. Same goes for graduating from a booster to a regular seat belt. Car seat safety is NOT about an age. I'm so happy to see things changing in the world of seat recommendations. Every child grows at a different rate and it's wonderful to see more of a use of weight/height recommendations than age. 

The goal when purchasing a seat should always be to keep the child in the safest possible position for as long as possible. Rear facing - buy a seat with a high weight/height limit. Forward facing - buy a seat that allows for a 5 point harness to be used for as long as possible (my son is 7 and still in a 5 point). Booster - buy one that has both a lap and shoulder belt then keep them in that booster as long as possible (most kids are between the ages of 10 - 12 when they graduate to a regular seat belt without booster use). This is an excellent post on booster seat safety and when it's appropriate to switch from the booster to a regular belt!

For people who are passionate about car seat safety, such as myself, we can be the ones that people whisper about. I'm sure Kye is among the very few kids still in a 5 point harness in the drop off line. Tess will be rear facing until kindergarten for sure and I'm pretty sure she'll be one of the only ones then as well (I'm sadly pretty sure she's one of the few still rear facing at a couple months older than 2). It's not about what everyone else is doing. It's about what is best. What keeps my children as safe as possible. When you know better, you should do better and I hope that sharing these things with others will help spread the knowledge about car seat safety! 

Emily is a mother of three and blogs at The Journey of Parenthood. 

Related Posts:

• Coats and Carseats {Coat Compression}
• Car Seat Safety Tips {Guest Post}

You can check me out today at Team Cartwright. I am talking about ways to reward children for good behavior. 

6 Rules for Keeping Children Safe from Strangers

I am living in a conflicting state of mind. I bet many of you are, also.

On this one hand, I want my children to have freedom to just be children. I want them to be able to roam and play like I could as a child. I want them to be able to ride their bikes several blocks to a friend's house. I want them to be able to live with more spontaneity and not so much "play date" planning. I read Free Range Kids (affiliate link). I loved the book. I agree we might be overly paranoid and sensitive living in our 24 hour news media culture.

But then there is my other hand. By nature, I am a "better safe than sorry" kind of gal. And I don't care if "only" a small percentage of children ever get kidnapped when doing xy and z. If my child became a statistic, I would wish I had been more careful. 

More paranoid. 

More crazy. 

There are scary things going on out in that world, and they are things I do not want my child being victims of. I have shared a couple of times on Facebook that I am starting to get more involvement with ways to help stop the human trafficking industry, and the more I learn about that, the more I want my children on a leash. Tied to me.

I recently took my children to a water park by myself. I have children ranging from 11 down to 3. Obviously, we were going to have some differences of interest levels in where the kids would want to play. My oldest is a competitive swimmer. My second has long ago passed off all requirements to be able to join a swim team. My third child had only dives left to pass of (though she is done now!). They all love to swim and are comfortable in the water.

My fourth child, however, has a fun tradition of crying through her lesson (though she oddly does what her teacher says. She just cries while doing it). You have heard about that if you follow me on Instagram. She isn't afraid of the water as a whole, but she is not so comfortable or daring to go down big slides or even chill in the lazy river. Clearly the children weren't all going to want to hang around in the same area at all times. 

We had an hour drive to get there, so on the drive, we talked about safety. Specifically, stranger danger type of safety. It isn't the first time we have talked about it, and they hear it all the time at school (wahoo!). They knew the drill. But I followed Ask and Tell and we went over it. Repeatedly. I was a man down and I made sure they were solid. 

Adults Don't Ask Children For Help

This is my number one reminder for my children always. Adults do not ask children for help. Adults ask adults for help. I tell my children they do not have to help an adult unless it is a parent (me or their father). Sadly, in our world, if the new man who moved in a few doors down saw my children outside as they walked between my house and a neighbor's house and asked them to come help him move some boxes in, I would want them to say no essentially. I would want them coming home and asking me about it before doing it (and I would only permit it if a parent was with the child). And an adult shouldn't be calling out to a child for help moving boxes into his house.  

Here is the funny reality, though. While most adults aren't going to ask children for help, there are always going to be those people who haven't realized it isn't okay and will ask a child for help anyway. And the person will really need some help and will probably grumble, "Kids these days" when the children say no and exit post-haste. So they might get asked for help quite innocently.

My children are also taught to respect elders and such. How does a child respect elders and stay safe? So I explained, "If someone asks you for help, respond, 'I am sorry; I can't help you with that. You could ask a lifeguard for help.' " I think that can give the naive asker a hint, it allows the children to still have manners, and it prevents the child from helping out of guilt. 

A lot of people will encourage you to tell your child to not be polite to a stranger. I am not in that camp. I think you can start with a polite decline. You are both still in a public place and the perpetrator isn't getting your child alone. If the person got more aggressive, then we move to fighting and yelling. 

Also, be sure your children understand that if an adult is trying to push the child to do something, the child is always free to use you as the scapegoat. Blame mom. "My mom will be very upset with me if I do that with out her permission first." "My mom has told me I am not allowed to go into anyone's home without asking her permission first."  

Always Ask For Permission

Along a similar idea, teach your children to always ask you for permission before moving locations. This is a level of overkill that will stifle some parents. You want your child to be able to just roam and wander like we did in the good old days. I get that. I have this rule in place to protect my children and to always know where they are. Neighbor invited them over? Great. Let me know before going. Leaving one neighbor house to go to another one? Sounds fun. Let me know about it. 

Just today, Brayden asked to go to one neighbor's house. I told him yes. A different neighbor girl then told Kaitlyn and McKenna that I said they could go over there (very innocent; I had told Brayden yes so she passed that permission on to all of the children). So they went without talking to me. I called the mom up and had her send the girls home. I explained to my girls that they needed permission from me to go to the neighbor's house. They needed to check in with me before taking off to go there.

Explain to your children that if they have to sneak to do something, then that thing is not a good thing to be doing. Not all things kids do without asking are sneaky, in fact, probably most are not, but there are times the sneaky will come up and you want your child to understand that it isn't okay and it isn't safe. 

Having the policy to ask is a great one for keeping a child safe from both strangers and potential perpetrators they know. Most children are victimized by people they know. If that person tells the child to sneak into a room with them, your child will know that is against the rules to sneak. If a stranger asks your child to help find a dog, your child knows she needs to ask permission first. It keeps your child out of potentially compromising situations.

Trust Your Instincts

Teach your child to trust his/her own "gut." If they don't feel good about it, teach them to listen to that feeling and get away from the situation. 

If Someone Persists, Fight Back

Let's say your child has done the first few perfectly and yet the person persists. The person starts to

follow your child or gets aggressive and tries to grab your child. This is when your child drops manners and fights back. Tell your child to run, yell, scream, flail, and scratch. Teach your child to yell a phrase to make it clear that this isn't just a giant tantrum between a parent and a child. "Who are you?" "Where is my mom?" "Someone help me I don't know this person!" 

Find a Mother with Children

Let your child know that if she has a bad feeling and/or needs to get away, she can go to a mother with children and ask her for help. This is kind of down on the list of steps because your aren't always going to be safe just because it is a woman with children. However, of all of the adults out there wandering around, I think this is your best bet. Obviously a police officer would be fantastic, but most of us do not have police officers around at all times. You see a lot more mothers with children in a day than you see police officers. 

Have Phone Number and Names Memorized

Once your child is with this nice helper, you want your child to get in contact with you. Make sure your child knows your name and phone number. Address is also helpful. If your child isn't old enough to have these things memorized, you really shouldn't allow your child to be unsupervised. Most children can memorize these things in full as a 4 or 5 year old. You can still teach the other steps to a child who doesn't have these things memorized, you just don't want a child who can't figure out how to get back to you out and about without a responsible person watching your child. 

Conclusion

We can sit back and reminisce about how much better our own childhoods were. We can bemoan the type of world our children are growing up in. We wouldn't be the first generation to do this. Our parents scoffed at our childhoods, too. They just weren't so connected to the entire world to see so many people also scoffing. 

Here is reality. We live in a different world. For better or worse (some of both I am sure), it is different. Our grandchildren will grow up in a different world from their parents. The cycle will continue. 

We need to look at the situation as realistically as we can, analyze the situation, determine what is reasonably safe for our own circumstances, and create rules based on that. Our children won't have the same childhood experiences we did. They will have their own. Someday, they will be laughing that the "You know your a child of the 2000s" lists just like we do for our own decades. We need to face our own inner conflicts, look at both of our hands, and figure out how to get those two conflicting hands together in a way that provides safety while allowing for a reasonable amount of space for growth. Take that conflict and resolve it. It isn't one or the other, it has to be a new way. 

The ladies of the BFBN are all taking a turn this week to talk about the importance of teaching your children how to stay safe. Here is the schedule:

Monday: Valerie at Chronicles of a Babywise Mom
Tuesday: Emily at The Journey of Parenthood 
Wednesday: Kimberly at Team Cartwright AND Natasha at Let's Be Brave
Thursday: Carrie at Wiley Adventures
Friday: Katrina at Mama's Organized Chaos

How to childproof your electrical outlets and devices {Guest Post}

This post is presented in partnership with Gillece Services of Pittsburgh! For more helpful home advice, you can visit them at Gillece.com.

Having a baby brings so much joy and light into your life. As infants, all they want is to snuggle into your loving arms. However, these children will learn to crawl, walk, run and climb – making it more difficult to keep them safe. Childproofing your electrical outlets and devices will help ease your mind knowing your child is safe from these electrical disasters.

For some reason, babies are drawn to outlets like a magnet. They will try sticking their fingers, toys and pretty much anything they can get their hands on into these hazardous outlets. Thankfully, there are some great products out there that can prevent your child from hurting themselves.

Outlet Caps – Individual outlet caps can be a quick fix. These little caps are the most affordable solution to the outlet problem. All you have to do is simply place the outlet caps, into the outlet. Your child will have a difficult time trying to remove these little buggers from the wall. When you need to use the outlet, remember to keep the outlet cap out of reach from your child.

Outlet Cover – Similar to the outlet cap, an electrical outlet cover can be purchased to prevent your child from getting hurt. An electrical outlet cover replaces your regular outlet and is safely attached with a screw. The spring activated cover prevents your child from having any access to the outlet. To plug in an appliance, place prongs into slots, slide and push.

Adapter plug cover – Does your child like making the lights in your home go on and off by plugging and unplugging the cord to your lamp? Babies may seem a little mischievous at times but they really are only curious. You can prevent your child from unplugging devices by using an adapter plug cover. Merely feed the cord through the cover, plug the cord in and attach the cover to the wall. No more dark rooms in your house!

Plug Locks – To keep your child from plugging in devices and potentially injuring themselves, plug locks can be an easy fix. A plug lock is used by plugging the device into the lock and removing the key. The plug lock can only be removed with a key.

Power Strip Cover – You might be wondering what to do about your power strip that has all your important devices plugged into it. Don’t you worry – there is a device for that as well. A power strip cover will do the same as an adapter plug cover – all of your devices will remain plugged in and your baby will be safe.

Long cord solution – Long cords can be very dangerous and a disaster waiting to happen. Keep your child safe from tripping on these long cords and shorten them. There are devices that can be purchased for this, or you can coil up the excess cord and place a zip tie around it.  

Don’t forget to inspect your outlets for discoloration and burns, this could mean there is faulty wiring near the switch and is dangerous. If you suspect there is something wrong with your wiring, seek professional assistance immediately.

As an expectant mother you are busy buying clothes, dippers, a stroller and many other baby necessities to prepare for your little one. Even new mothers are wrapped up with their new bundle of joy and coping with the work that goes with it. Although you might not want to think about it, your baby will leave your arms someday. Take the precautions and be confident knowing your child will be safe from electrical dangers.

See Also:

• House-Proofing: Pick your battles
• Child-Proofing vs. House-Proofing
• Baby-Proofing

Front Seat Fun v. Back Seat Boredom {Guest Post}

image source

By Valerie Cox

As parents, one of our greatest responsibilities is to protect our children, and ensuring your children’s safety can be any action from holding their hands when crossing the street to knowing their whereabouts on a playground.  At the top of a parent safety checklist should be to know and abide by proper car safety guidelines, and while your children might whine about their seating arrangements, their safety is far more important than their liking.

In the past decade, numerous studies have confirmed the importance of car seats and the value of protection they bring to your child, and in the car seat industry, four typesof car seats are available.  Rear-facing car seats feature a harness and will cradle the child to protect the neck and spinal region, and forward-facing car seats have a harness and tether to decrease the child’s forward motion.  A booster seat lifts the child up from the seat so the seatbelt fits properly over the child’s body, and a seatbelt restrains the child by holding them back in proper position.

One ofthe largest misconceptions about car safety is when to make the switch from rear-facing to forward-facing to booster to backseat seatbelts to front seat seatbelts.  According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, children should stay rear-facing for as long as possible or at least until 2 years of age.  Children should remain in booster seats until the seatbelt lies across their upper thighs and fits snug across their shoulders.  Car seats have specific height and weight requirements listed on the back or sides and should be consulted for precise information.  A general rule is rear-facing until age 2, forward-facing until age 5, and a booster seat until a seatbelt fits correctly, but each child is unique because of height and weight differences.

Each state has specific laws and fines regarding transporting children safely in a vehicle, and you should stay current with your state’s restrictions and also those of any state you will be driving in.  To make certain your child is in the proper car seat, BabyCenter has an interactive tool based on your state and child’s weight and height to make certain your child is in the proper car seat.

Children cannot wait to move from the back seat to the front, but this decision should not be made lightly.  They need to be both tall and heavy enough for the seatbelt to be effective during an accident, and the dangers of moving to the front seat too early include being thrown through the windshield and not sitting in the proper position for an airbag to work correctly.  Because airbags inflate so rapidly, the impact alone can turn a 30 mph crash into what feels like a 200 mph crash.  Children should be at least 4’9” and weight at least 80 pounds to switch from the back seat to the front seat, but just because your child meets the height and weight requirements does not mean you should allow the change.  Most studies agree that 12 to 13 is the proper age to switch your child.  Similar to keeping your child rear-facing for as long as possible, having your child remain in the back seat for as long as possible is the smartest decision.

Under certain circumstances, your child is safer in the front seat despite not meeting the height and weight requirements.  For example, if your back seat seatbelts are broken or if the car seat will not properly install in the back seat, then the front seat with a working seatbelt is better than the back seat with no seatbelt at all.  As the parent, you should use your best judgment, but as a general practice, the back seat is the safest place for your child.

For children, it can be hard to understand the importance of remaining in a car seat and sitting in the back seat, but as parents, it is our job to teach them the significance of proper car safety.  We need to make sure they understand the importance of abiding by proper car safety practices no matter who is driving.  Keeping up with safety requirements might seem tiresome, but when you think of your precious children’s faces, their smiles make it all worthwhile.

Valerie enjoys reading, traveling, baking, and playing with her puppy, Emma.  Some of her favorites include Taylor Swift, Sprite, and Grey’s Anatomy, and she believes in making every moment count.

Car Seat Safety Tips {Guest Post}

by Emily Parker

For me, car seat safety is a no-brainer. It's something I take very seriously and consider it a top priority of mine to make sure I stay on top of the latest recommendations. I'm sure every single person reading this drives a car. Most likely at least once a day. And most likely you child also rides in a car, at least once a day. The centers for disease control and prevention's website states: "Motor vehicle injuries are a leading cause of death among children in the United States. But many of these deaths can be prevented. Placing children in age- and size-appropraite car and booster seats reduces serious and fatal injuries by more than half."

While we ALL know that car seat safety is important. It also feels overwhelming. The standards continue to change constantly and it's difficult to keep up! I do the best I can to stay "in the know" yet I am still learning new things every day and will probably miss some of the recommendations in this post. Hopefully even just this bit of information will help others in the quest for car ride safety!

1. Proper Seat: It all starts with making sure your child is in the correct seat. Do your research when buying a seat and make sure it has the top safety features available. Never buy a used car seat (I'm all about some bargain hunting and buying stuff at consignment sales but a used car seat is not safe and not worth saving a little money) and make sure your car seats aren't expired. I found this chart from Chicco and it illustrates how to know which seat is the safest one at each age for your child:

2. Rear Facing: I think, by now, it's common knowledge that keeping your child in a rear facing car seat is the SAFEST way for them to travel. Even if they are older than the law requires. Even if their legs look "cramped" or they just "seem uncomfortable." You child should remain rear facing until they reach the height or weight limit required by the manufacturer. My tip? When you start shopping for a car seat, find one that has a taller height limit and heavier weight limit so you KNOW they will get to stay rear-facing for an extended period of time. I know rear-facing isn't as easy as forward facing. It's a pain to put them in, it's a pain to keep them entertained. But it's the safest and that really is what matters most. I try to remind myself that my child doesn't know any different...all they have ever known is facing backwards in the car so it really probably doesn't bother them as much as it annoys me! My daughter will be two in December. She is still rear-facing and I'm hoping she will be able to continue to be rear-facing until her third birthday!

This is a statement taken directly from the AAP's website: "All infants and toddlers should ride in a rear-facing car safety seat until 2 years of age or until they reach the highest weight or height allowed by the car safety seat manufacturer."

3. Harness: Once your child is forward facing it's also important to keep them in a five-point harness for as long as the manufacturer recommends. I've seen many children in booster seats who could have still easily fit into a harness seat. The harness and the top tether provides upper torso, head, and neck protection. (source) My son will be five in March and will stay in his five point harness as long as possible! 

4. Proper Install: Bottom line, read the instruction manual that comes with your seat!!! Every single car seat is different. There are different instructions on how to properly install it. Most parents I know will spend top dollar on the best quality and highest safety rated car seat, but if it's not installed properly then it can't do its job. 

5. Buckle Up: You buy a good quality seat. You get the proper one for your child's age, height and weight. You read the manual. You install it properly. You'd think you'd be good to go, huh? But actually there are many important things to remember EVERY time you buckle your child into the seat!!! Each car seat manual should also go over all of these instructions as well as many more that I may be missing, so again, read it ;)

• Strap Location: This gets me confused every time! I have one rear-facing child and one forward facing so I am always looking up what the correct location of their strap heights should be. As the kids grow and I readjust the levels I want to always make sure they are in the proper location. Rear facing straps go at or below the shoulders. Forward facing straps go at or above the shoulders.
• Straps: Make sure the straps are never twisted! It's a pain to always make sure they are laying flat but it's also important!
• Chest Clip: The chest clip should be across your child's arm pits. Both positioned too high or too low is dangerous! For me it's higher than feels natural and it's something I'm constantly making sure of each time I buckle the kids in. It's an easy one to get wrong (just look on your Facebook newsfeed...bet you can count 10 kids pictures pretty quickly who probably have the chest clip too low!) and something that is very important to always double check.
  
  
• Pinch Test: Another "easy miss" when buckling the kids in is making sure the straps are tight enough on them. A simple way to know if the straps are tight enough is to pinch them! If you can pinch the strap then it's too loose. Simple and quick way to ensure your sweet one's safety!
• Jackets: I don't personally live in an area where we even need to wear heavy coats often but it's important to always remember to have your child remove their coat before getting in the car seat. I saw this image awhile back and it really opened my eyes to just how dangerous wearing a jacket in a car seat is! If you do want your child to wear their jacket in the car then adjust the straps on them without the jacket on and then have them wear it. The material in the jacket will compress (which is also why it's so dangerous to fit the straps with the jacket on).
  

I know there are MANY other safety tips out there about car seats but I hope this post will help raise awareness about car seat safety and encourage others to read those manuals and do all we can to protect our children. If you have some tips you recommend or sites with great safety recommendations then please share!!! Knowledge is power and education is essential when it comes to car seat safety! 

~Emily www.journeyofparenthood.com

Tips for Baby-Proofing Your Home

Tips for Baby-Proofing Your Home. What to baby proof and what to leave out. You don't want to make everything indestructible. 

When it comes time to baby proof your house, I would recommend you not go overboard. You do not need to baby proof every single thing.

Of course it is wise to do what is necessary for the safety of your children. For example, put outlet covers on your outlets, move your household cleaners out of the reach of your children, secure bookcases to the wall if needed, perhaps a gate for the stairs, etc.

It is also wise to remove or move anything that you would be devastated over if it were destroyed. If you have heirloom china out from your great-grandmother, perhaps that would be good to put in a safe place until you know your child will obey you and not touch it.

Once you have things fully safe and the valuables moved out of the way, there is very little you need to do. You don't need to lock up every cupboard and drawer. You don't need to move everything out of the reach of your child. You needn't have bare shelves and tables. Doing that removes learning opportunities for your child. It is okay to have items that are off-limits that your child can reach. In fact, I it isn't just okay, it is a good idea.