7 Practical Ways to Save Money on Baby Items

Practical Ways to Save Money on Baby Items. Tips to save money on everything you need for baby.

What to know how not to spend a fortune on a new baby? This is the list for you!

1) Accept Hand-Me-Downs

We have been so abundantly blessed to receive a ton of baby gear from friends and family. If you're looking to save money then saying goodbye to any pride you have about accepting second-hand items will do you in good stead. It's also good to bear in mind that by accepting the gift of hand-me-downs from another family you're allowing them to be a blessing to you. Most times people are happy to get rid of clothes and other baby items so that they can de-clutter their home. I would suggest asking what their expectations are. For instance, I when we have been given clothes I always ask if it's okay to pass them on to someone else once we're finished using them. That way, if there's anything that isn't to your taste or doesn't suit your child you can re-gift them to another person with no guilt. Hand-me-downs aren't limited to clothes either. We were given a crib, bassinet, bouncer, baby bath, and a number of other items. Of course, you'll want to know the kind of home the item has come from, but so long as you're comfortable with that there is nothing wrong with second-hand! The only exception is a mattress. Over time they lose their firmness and may not be as safe to use. Not to mention they tend to hold onto dust mites, etc. Do some research and get your baby a good quality mattress, but otherwise be open to receiving second-hand items.

3 REASONS IT IS OKAY TO NOT LIKE BEING PREGNANT {Guest Post)

Inside: 3 REASONS IT IS OKAY TO NOT LIKE BEING PREGNANT . Pregnancy is not always fun and it doesn't make you a bad mom to not enjoy it. 

I've often seen harsh comments made by some that say a woman has no right to complain about being pregnant. I understand the sentiment. As a whole, I don't like to complain. I like to try and see the positive to things. However, I also see that for some reason, complaining about pregnancy is equated to being ungrateful. Of course, there are exceptions to the majority, but I would say that in general, this assumption is false.

Pregnancy Is Hard

You can be fit and healthy but pregnancy can still be super challenging. There are the obvious physical ailments such as morning sickness, the extra weight to carry around, swollen joints, round ligament pain, etc etc. However, so often the unseen things are excluded. Hormones play a huge role in how we feel. Did you know that there is such a thing as antenatal depression? No one knows how pregnancy is going to affect them, but I would say that most women wouldn't say it is a walk in the park. (Read about the 5 things that surprised me during pregnancy -- HERE)

Pregnancy Is Unique

I admit that I get easily frustrated when women push their experience onto someone else. Just because you didn't feel a certain way doesn't mean that another woman can't or won't. Pregnancy is so very individual. We experience things differently. Our situations are different. Gosh, I've been pregnant three times and they've all had their own unique symptoms. If you had an 'easy' ride, then that's wonderful, but don't brush away the feelings of others just because you didn't personally experience them. Some women feel like goddesses during pregnancy. Their skin glows and they feel like the essence of femininity. Others (like myself) feel sick and totally unlike themselves. While I greatly value what my body is doing to grow my child, I don't feel feminine...I feel more akin to a beached whale.

You Still Love Your Baby

If I'm being honest, if I listed out the things I would miss about pregnancy, and those I would not, the 'would not' list would be significantly longer. I don't love the fatigue, the hormone swings, the weight gain, the morning sickness, and the general lack of control. I struggle with not being capable of some of the basic tasks of daily living. HOWEVER... I still love my baby. I don't love being pregnant, but I'm so excited that I get another child out of it. The nine months of challenges are outweighed by that moment when I get to hold my precious child in my arms for the first time. Do I complain about the pregnancy during those nine months? You betcha! However, as much as I struggle with my body image and mental health, I still have the utmost respect for the ability my body has to grow and nurture a human into existence. So, it's okay to not love being pregnant. I remember my mother saying that if a stork could just drop the baby off, that would be great. Ha! However, I think there is a difference between not enjoying something and not being grateful for it. I don't love it when it rains, but gosh I'm thankful that it makes the country I live in so green and lush!

Christine Keys          

Motherhood & Parenting Blogger

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Related Pregnancy Posts on this Blog:

• Morning Sickness
• Pregnancy and the Guilt
• Pregnancy: Weight Gain and Eternal Perspective
• Pregnancy: Think Through Abilities

Creative Ways to Choose the Perfect Baby Name

Creative Ways to Choose the Perfect Baby Name. Ten different ways to choose the best name for your baby.

Choosing a name for a baby is a bit responsibility. This is sadly a responsibility that some parents utterly drop the ball on (like...the lady who named her child Vagina. Don't worry, it is pronounced Vageena. You can't make this stuff up!). You worry about your baby's name being the right fit, sounding good with the last name, and having nice nick-names. You want the name to be good for a baby, child, AND an adult. You may want a popular name or an uncommon name. You then have the issues of having to disassociate yourself with other people you have known with names (good luck, teachers!). If you name after family, will you hurt feelings of other family? The list goes on. Add to that the fact that there are two parents naming this baby and not one...it is a wonder any of us have names at all. A name stays with you for your entire life, so it is completely reasonable to take it seriously. 

We took it seriously when we named our children, but some names just came to us while others were difficult. Kaitlyn was a name we both loved before we were even ever pregnant with Brayden. We knew that would be the name of our first daughter. It was set and decided.

Then our oldest was a boy. I wanted a name chosen quickly--I hated calling the baby "baby" and wanted a name to call him. We had a hard time choosing a boy name. My husband played football and therefore knew a lot of guys who were basically jerks. He remembers their locker room talk and he didn’t want his son being like many of those people. It took FOREVER to find a name he was okay with. I finally told him that he had to disassociate himself from names. Every gets some veto names, yes. There are some names I just couldn't do. He had literally never known a Brayden, so in the end, it worked out. We chose the spelling of Brayden because it means "brave" while Braden means "from the wide valley."

Braxston is the baby boy we lost at 20 weeks. My husband chose his name because the strongest reality my husband had to the baby at the time was my constant contractions. 

When Kaitlyn came along, we already knew our first girl name. When Kaitlyn was a newborn, we were at the zoo and heard a mom call out, “McKenna!” We looked at each other and knew that would be the name of our next daughter. 

When McKenna was a baby, I was helping in Brayden’s kindergarten class. I was prepping stuff for the Christmas program and checking off names in the afternoon class (Brayden was in morning class). I came to the name “Brynlee”. I had the thought, “If I have another girl, that will be her name.” And I did! 

All of our children are named after family for middle names.

I asked my Facebook followers how they choose their baby names and loved their ideas! Here are their methods. 

How to Choose a Baby Name

Choose a Name from the Bible

Hannah shared:

"Anna comes from the name Hannah which In the bible God blessed Hannah with a child when she had none. Also Hannah is my name and Lise comes from the name Elizabeth whom God also blessed with a child. This name is special to me because I suffered an ectopic pregnancy as my first pregnancy and God blessed me with Annalise. I found this name and my husband loved it."

Relax and Let One Parent Pick

Emily shared: 

"My first 2 are girls and I already had names that I loved...so we went with those and my husband didn't care too much. I'm pregnant with our third which we just found out is a boy...I have no names, so I'm letting my husband pick"

Candice shared:

"If it was a girl my husband got to name her and vice versa....we named our son "Frank" after my Grandpa...my hubby hated t at first but its growing on him :)...to be fair tho...i hated his pick for a girl (lylith) lol"

Lauren shared:

"I got to pick a boy name and my husband picked a girl name, and we ended up having a boy.

Honestly I heard my son's name in a show I really like, and when I pitched it to my husband he liked it too and it ended up fitting perfectly for my son."

Carrie shared:

"We decided that I would name girls and he would name boys, but we both had Veto power."

Peruse the Social Security Website

Press shared:

"We each went on the social security website separately and chose names past the 200 mark. We wanted an uncommon name and one not associated with family or anyone we know so as not to offend anyone. We each made a list of 15 names then swapped lists. We had 4 of the same names on our list, narrowed it down to our top 3 and chose what sounded best with our last name. We struggled a bit with the spelling but went with an easy spelling. For the middle name my husband had no clue so I gave him my top 3 and he chose the one he liked best."

Name After Family/Friends

Lacey shared:

"We talked and talked about names until we came up with them. It was hard picking names as a teacher where I didn’t have a bad or weird association with a name lol It also meant I liked names that were easy to spell and pronounce. Cody James is our first.
Luke Bradley is our second. My husbands 22 yo cousin died on the fire dept while I was pregnant with Luke. We had a different middle name picked but immediately decided to use Bradley after him for his middle name. Luke has Brad’s badge displayed in his room. We talk about it a lot but their daddy is also a fire fighter so we have to be careful how we tel them about him."

Angela shared:
"We went with historical family name. Giuseppe and Gianna were my husbands great grandparents. Giuseppe immigrated from Italy when he was a child. Later he married Gianna. I like that they match. They mean Joseph and Jane."

Katie shared:

"Our first was named after my brother in law & it was such an easy decision (Will) and my newborn was so much harder to decide on. We finally narrowed it down to two and then took about 15 hours after she was born to know she was an Eliza and not a Tessa. Their middle names are both Biblical which was very meaningful to me."

Abby shared: 

"My husband names our oldest after his 2 best friends, Daniel Parker. I named our middle my 2 favorite names, Konrad Asher. We had to agree on a name for our youngest, and it took till week 34 or 35, and even that was a compromise: Malachi Patrick, with Kai as an optional nickname."

Christine shared:

"Was going to be Audrey Katherine (Audrey comes from my grandmother's middle name), but my hubby didn't think anyone was named Audrey anymore (HELLOOOO... it's quite popular!). So we switched it: Katherine Audrey. Kid 2: I originally liked the name Liam, but for whatever reason, his personality in utero was not really a "Liam." Hubby wanted a Biblical name and offered me a list. I picked Joshua and then added two middle names to make my son named Joshua Patrick Theodore, his own unique name, my hubby's name, and my father's name."

Sarah shared:

"My husband's lifetime best friend (who became mine as well) passed away a few weeks before we found out. There was no doubt we were gonna name our baby after him, whether a boy or girl. We had a boy and I truly believe our best friend is his Guardian Angel."

Name After Meaningful Locations

Allison shared: 

"Our daughter was named after a winery we went to in Napa Valley on our honeymoon. It wasn't actually my husband's first choice but after I was rushed back for emergency surgery after c-section, he let me decide on her name! Artessa Jane"

Natalie shared:

"We wanted something not incredibly common, but something that would be easy to spell and easy for people to pronounce. We also liked last names as first names. I was a librarian at the time, and my husband joked that we should pick a name that related to libraries in some way and we ended up with the name Reid. For our second, we knew we wanted to continue using R names, and settled on Riley for our daughter."

Be Open to Random Inspiration

Lynn shared:

"We chose Olive for one of our twin daughters quite by accident thanks to the What To Expect app. We kept calling the baby (at that point we didn’t know we had twins) whatever fruit/veggie they said they were the size of. So at first, we called her Baby Rice, Baby Pea, etc, and when it was time for Baby Olive we said, “hey, I kinda like that!” and decided on Olive for a girl name right on the spot! We get compliments on her name ALL the time.

Her sister’s name we struggled with for months! We eventually settled on Emilie."

Misty shared:
"Off a souvenir name plate rack outside a tourist shop while we were waiting for an international flight."

Marah shared:

"I heard someone talking about Holland and fell in love with it for a girls name. That was about 2 months before I found out I was pregnant. I loved how unique of a first name it was without being too strange."

Do Your Research

Alyssa shared:

"Apps, books, researching meanings of names and comparing favorite. Lots of vetoing a la Rachel and Ross... our last one we could only agree on one name in the last day of the hospital and now call her a ton of nick names. We call all our kids by nick names actually. So I think our biggest deciding factors were name meanings and nicknames. We picked out our middle child’s name back when we were dating; just tried to think up the most epic name ever and we found it - Maximus!"

Ashley shared:
"Our first was a girl so we had to find a name, a boy would've been "junior." We first looked at the top 25 girl names. We both had top 5 names growing up and think it's cool/fun bumping into people with the same name." 

Consider the Meaning of the Name

Charlene shared:

"We went through name lists combined with names we already had in our heads, checked the meanings and loved them. Our first means appointed which we thought was pretty special. And the second means strong fort, protector of man, which we can definitely see already at 2yo. Names give so much purpose. While they are developing, their life is paved out in front of them. So cool."

Leona shared:

"I really like names that have a good meaning, and / or come from family names.
I usually make a short list and then we talked about it and arrow it down. Right now we have one chosen for number for and we are just letting it sit for a little bit and till we decide for sure."

Name After Books

Lori shared:

"Favorite literature - such as Gone with the Wind. Three of my girls are named from that😉"

Call the Baby Names Until You Find the Right One

Karen shared:

"Well, for the first one I made a short list, then my husband and I talked about the names on the short list, tried using the name(s) in sentances when referring to him until it just felt right."

Related Posts:

• Index For Newborns
• Pregnancy and the Guilt
• Pregnancy News Flash: Pain is not a Requirement
• Pregnancy: Weight Gain and Eternal Perspective
• Prepping Siblings For Baby

What You Should Pack in Your Hospital Bag for Delivering a Baby

I was ready. When I research something, I don't turn to one source only. Oh no. I was taught better than that. You need multiple sources to verify your point, and that standard that was drilled in my head over and over again in college has carried on and into my every day life.

My hospital packing list was no different. 

I wasn't going to read one person's list and leave it at that. 

Nope. I would look at many. I would find out what was common. I would carefully consider things that only made it to one list. I would read books. I would be as prepared as possible, because that is how I roll and there was no way I was rolling into labor with a nagging "what if I forgot something" in the back of my head.

I was over-prepared, and that was okay. I prefer that to the opposite.

But I amended my list over the years and through my deliveries. I want to be prepared, but there is no reason to pack things I would never use just to have to unpack them when I got home. Simplify.

And with any good list comes some caveats.

There are some things that will depend. 

Brayden and Kaitlyn both had short labors. I didn't need anything "to do" with me because I didn't have time for it.

McKenna's was twice as long, and we would have liked some things we had packed with Brayden but since banished from our list. Now, this was waaaayyy back in the day before we carried around computers in our pockets, so "entertainment" probably doesn't even need to be packed like it was then. Never-the-less, the takeaway is that your perfect list will vary based on how long your labor is. And unless you have having a planed cesarean, you don't have much way of knowing how long you will be in that hospital room before the baby arrives. 

Another important point is that your list will vary based on what your hospital offers. What my hospital automatically provides won't necessarily be true of your hospital. So ask around, crowd-source, with people who have recently delivered at your hospital. 

On to the list!

*Shrug* You're Pregnant!

Try to imagine, if you will, a world where your first thought when you had a question was not to "Google" it. Try to imagine a world where the iPhone did not even exist. A world where your questions in life could not be answered by 1,000 of your closest friends on Facebook. This is the world I was first pregnant in. Really! That meant that when I had a question about my pregnancy, I would basically turn to (affiliate link) What to Expect When You are Expecting, close family and friends, and my doctor. My real doctor.

I was recently laughing with a friend whose first O.B. recently retired. He was obviously an older man since he is of retiring age. She told me that every time she told him of an ailment she was experiencing when pregnant, his response would be to shrug and say, "You're pregnant!" "What do you expect, you're pregnant!" Pregnant women have long been essentially told to suck it up, that's life, and it will end soon.

Her new doctor, however, is giving her ideas of ways to help the common ailments of pregnancy. And, surprise, it is helping!

When you are pregnant, there are a TON of changes going on in your body. And each pregnancy is a little different. You don't get every symptom every time. Some symptoms come on faster or stronger with multiple pregnancies. Some symptoms come on more with age. Some are just random. 

My first few pregnancies, I took on the attitude of my friend's doctor. "I'm pregnant! Of course I am sick. Of course my sciatic nerve is pinched. Of course my heartburn is terrible..." During my third pregnancy (so remember that I had Brayden, lost a baby boy named Braxston, then had Kaitlyn, so this is during Kaitlyn's pregnancy), I somehow let on how much I threw up on a daily basis. My O.B. new me better by then and probably paid more attention to what I was saying and started to read in between the lines. In fact, when I delivered Braxston and declined pain meds, the nurse said, "He said you would say no." 

As he learned that throwing up only five times a day was a good day for me, he prescribed some medication for me to take to help so I wouldn't throw up so much. And guess what?!? It worked! I went to throwing up once a day instead! It was amazing. 

When I was pregnant for the fourth time, asking the Internet for help was common practice. I started to search out some helps. Not only could I Google it, but I could ask networks of groups online of moms who had been pregnant recently! Moms who still could remember how bad it can suck to be pregnant at times. Moms who didn't just say, "You're pregnant!" Moms who would say, "I did this and it really helped me!" I could find moms with very similar experiences and get advice that just might help me! 

If you are pregnant, do not accept every discomfort as something you just have to live with because you are pregnant. Their are often solutions that can help you be more comfortable. Yes you are pregnant, but there are many solutions to those discomforts, and most of them are so simple. 

Now, I am a super cautious person, and never more so when pregnant, especially after losing a baby. I never even ate one food on the "Do not eat" list when I was pregnant. And so I caution you to be wise and consult with your doctor when trying remedies.

I have seen many, many pieces of advice given over the years that don't quite have the full part of information a pregnant woman would need. For example, taking raspberry tea leaves can help with nausea, so this is often given as advice. What most people don't realize, however, is that raspberry tea leaves thin your blood. There is a point in your pregnancy when you should not be taking them anymore. If you take them too close to your delivery, you risk bleeding too much and putting your life at risk. The raspberry tea leaves was a remedy suggested to me by my grandmother. I ran it by my doctor and he told me when I could take them and when I couldn't. So if I am going to clear my own grandmother's advice, you should certainly clear the random advice you are finding on the internet. 

Do not live with the pain and discomfort! Find possible solutions, ask your doctor about any that need to be cleared by a doctor, and try them! You are pregnant, but that doesn't mean you have to be totally uncomfortable all the time. Or even just for nine months.

Related Posts:

• Morning Sickness
• Pregnant and Coughing?
• Pregnancy News Flash: Pain is not a Requirement
• Remedies for Reflux/Heartburn During Pregnancy
• Surviving Bed Rest

Improving Your Skin and Hair: How I got rid of my "mask of pregnancy"

"I still have the mask of pregnancy and it has been almost a year!" I told the nurse practitioner. McKenna was nearly a year old and the nurse and I were trying to figure out what might be wrong with me. There were all sorts of mysteries, including this mask of pregnancy (officially known as Melasma) that wouldn't go away. She sympathized with me and could clearly see it there.

I later had Brinley and still the mask remained. I tried many topical items. I hoped treating my thyroid would somehow help. Nothing improved the situation. 

But the thyroid! Ugh. I was losing copious amounts of hair. You know how you lose hair after you have a baby? That was me. For a couple of years. I don't know how I still have hair, honestly. I guess it is because I started with thick hair--not so thick I have to get it thinned, but thick. After a couple of years of my body purging hair, however, it had arrived at thin. Noticeably thin. I like my hair cut in long layers and I had to start working toward eliminating that because the bottom layer looked too thin. 

One day I was at the store and looking at the vitamins. I had some time to kill while Kaitlyn was at dance class and looking at vitamins always intrigues me. As I was perusing, I saw something that caught my eye. There were a few different types of vitamins labeled "Hair, Skin, and Nails." Would this solve my hair problem?!? I had long since given up on the skin problem. I had never been one to wear foundation, but a few months earlier I started wearing it daily to help smooth the "mask of pregnancy" look. 

But the hair...there was nothing I could do to hide that. This post contains affiliate links. 

I figured it was worth a shot. I chose one brand (Nature Made Vitamelts Hair-Skin-Nails) and purchased it (this, by the way, was very difficult for me. I just chose a brand without reading a thousand reviews?!? What had come over me?!?). 

I started taking them daily. Within a week or two, my hair loss slowed down significantly. My husband commented on the lack of hair in the shower. I was no longer pulling handfuls out. I got my hair cut and my hair dresser said she saw a lot of new growth. Hurray!

And bonus! After 7 years, my mask of pregnancy was fading! Fading! Going away! Buh-bye! 

I started that around Halloween of last year, and today as we approach St. Patrck's Day, my mask of pregnancy is gone. The other day as I thought about how fantastic it is that I stumbled across this product, I realized I needed to share it with you all! Everything I read about how to treat this was either topical or "change your birth control pills" (which I don't use so...yeah). This is the first thing that has worked for me. I hope it can help someone else!

Poll Results: Announcing Pregnancy

Our latest poll was on announcing pregnancy. It was so fun to read through the answers! You can see them here. The answers are completely worth the read--there are a lot of insightful thoughts. Here are the results:

How many weeks gestation were you when you announced you were pregnant?

5ish Weeks: 7

8 Weeks: 3

12 Weeks: 2

Did you tell everyone at once, or did you tell family and close friends first and then weeks later tell the general public?

Family/Friends first--general public later: 10

Family/Friends first--general public later, but close together: 1

All at once basically: 1

What was your rational for announcing when you did?

Excited/Celebrating Life Right Away: 6

Wanted to wait until after ultrasound/"safer" from miscarriage time: 4

Private person so I didn't broadcast: 1

Medical Mix Up: 1

Will you do things differently next time?

Yes: 5

No: 6

Maybe:

Any fun ideas for how to make the big announcement?

Katy said: For the first announcement, took a pic of our dogs saying they were going to be big brothers. This time took a picture of my daughter in a big sister shirt. Tried to get her to hold the ultrasound but that didn't happen.

Ashley said: I want to make a sign/graphic announcing Baby's due date, take pictures with my son wearing a "Big Brother" shirt, and take more baby bump photos than I did the first time around. I am hoping to have another pregnancy after #2, but Hubby isn't on board with that at this time.

Amanda said: When we announced baby #3- had the girls sit at the kids table in our homeschool room. They wach had a sign in front of them "Big Sister" and "Big Sister in Training" with a sign in the middle of the table that said "New Job Starts Aug 2015"

Laura said: "For Baby 1 we took both sets of grandparents for dinner and gave them wrapped baby photo almbums with the sonogram picture

For Baby 2 cute Etsy tshirts announcing the pregnancy, then texted the picture to everyone else."

Kellilayne said: "I saw one once that had a picture of the mom holding a "bun in the oven" sign and the dad holding a "baker" sign. That made me laugh. :p" 

Christine said: "We took pictures of shoes in a row, with our D.O.B underneath."

Jess said: Pinterest gives me all my ideas 

smile emoticon

Anything else you want to say?

Ashley said: My dear friend who has struggled with infertility said that she would share news of her pregnancy as soon as she knew because all life deserves to be celebrated, no matter how short-lived. I thought she had a beautiful attitude and am encouraged to do that next time around."

Laura said: "In both cases we called importante people to let them know in the phone prior to putting it up on Facebook."

Kellilayne said: "If I had a miscarriage in the first trimester I didn't want to have to talk about it with everyone. My rule of thumb was, if I wouldn't feel comfortable sharing news of a miscarriage with someone, I didn't tell them I was pregnant until the 2nd trimester"

Christine said: "I totally get why people wait to announce in regards to the risk of miscarriage (I really stressed about this), but someone once said something that changed my mind. That is, every life should be acknowledged. If you keep the knowledge of your pregnancy to yourself, then miscarry, others don't necessarily get to acknowledge your bubba's life. However, I totally respect everyone else's point of view in this regard. It is a very personal decision."

Poll Discussion: Announcing Pregnancy

A reader requested we talk about announcing pregnancy for our next poll. That is a fun topic! It is very helpful for me when compiling answers if you at least number the answers you give. You can also copy the questions and answer them. If the question does not apply to you, simply put "N/A."

1. How many weeks gestation were you when you announced you were pregnant?
2. Did you tell everyone at once, or did you tell family and close friends first and then weeks later tell the general public?
3. What was your rational for announcing when you did?
4. Will you do things differently next time?
5. Any fun ideas for how to make the big announcement?
6. Anything else you want to say?

Surviving Bed Rest

Bed rest is one of those things that sounds nice in theory (maybe even heavenly!), and can be nice...for a couple of hours. Then it becomes pretty much torturous--especially if you have children to take care of. There are ways to survive this period. Here are my ideas, your ideas, and ideas of my friends.

1-Entertainment

Whether you have children or not, you will likely get bored sitting in bed all day every day for however long it lasts. My friend Serra pointed out that it is a great time to work on those things you never seem to have time for. A trick I find is remembering all of those things when the opportunity arises. Here are some ideas on what you can do for entertainment while in bed.

• Books to read
• Crafts (like knitting, crochet, jewelry making, needlepoint...Hey even coloring can work)
• Movies to watch
• My friend Melissa chose to watch all movies nominated for Best Picture in the previous Academy Awards
• My cousin-in-law Shelly suggested choosing a new series to watch on Netflix--what a great idea!
• Entertain yourself with your smart phone or tablet
• Write in your journal
• Scrapbook
• Family history
• Laptop
• Games--My friend Garity said she had her children bring a table over by her and they would play games. 
• Organize files on your computer--pictures, documents, videos, iTunes, etc.
• Blogging
• Work on a degree online (this was really done!)
• My friend Bree said she chose a new skill to learn and work on, so don't think things like, "I can't crochet so that is out!" You can learn how! It is easy to find tutorials to do things on Pinterest and on YouTube.
• Carla (author of Mom's Notes) had great advice (not surprisingly so). She said she scheduled her time and had a plan. So she broke it up into TV time, kid time, hubby time, rest time, phone time with friends and scrapbook time.
• Stay with the family. If you are able to move around at all, stay with your family when you can. With me being an extrovert, being locked in my room alone was pretty much torture. I would crawl down the stairs (literally) so I could join the family in the evenings and be part of what was going on.

2-Entertainment for Children

One of the hardest parts of bed rest when you have children is keeping them entertained and occupied while you are stuck in bed. It will be easier to "couch parent" (parent while sitting on your behind) if you have worked to have your child respect and obey your voice. I wrote more on this here. Here are some ideas to keep them occupied.

• TV/Movies for children. I am not a huge fan of the television, but sometimes we have to do things to survive what we are going through. When you are stuck in bed all day is an excellent time if I ever saw one to allow for some extra television. Just be prepared for the detox session that is sure to come once you are back to yourself. I allowed McKenna more screen time than I normally would while I was laid up with my foot last month. She had a rough few days coming off of that, but we both survived :)
• Books. Read books with your children! Children love to be read to. When else will you have all day long to sit and read books to your kids? McKenna loved sitting in bed next to me and getting all snuggly while we read books.
• Fashion shows. My cousin Stephanie said she had her children do fashion shows for her when she was on bed rest. What a fun idea!
• Play with toys. Your children can bring all sorts of toys to you to play with while you sit in bed or on the couch. How about dolls, cars, or picnic?
• Maintain your schedule. You will be so glad you have things like nap time, rest time, and independent playtime. Don't let things become a free for all. Stick to a schedule. Have older children help get younger children where they need to be. Have help come when naptime starts or ends to get kids in and out of bed. Have Independent Play be a bit longer than normal if your child will do so. Even if you add more TV time than normal, still have it scheduled into the rest of the day. 

3-Your Comfort

Another hard facet of bed rest is getting uncomfortable. Bed sores are a real thing. Here are some ideas to keep you comfortable.

• Nice smells (like wax melTing)
• doTerra oils
• Nice blanket
• Comfortable PJs
• Warm showers
• Massages--my friend Garity said many massage technicians will come to your house
• Pedicure

4-Help from Others

When people offer help, accept it. My friend Garity said, "Rule #1 that took forever for me to learn was to accept help when it was offered!!! Don't be afraid to ask for company just to come over and talk and don't worry about what the house looks like when they do come over to visit." If you know someone on bed rest, here are some ideas of ways you can help:

• Take meals to the family. There are websites you can use to organize meals. You can take a meal and organize a system to help get meals to the family from other friends and family.
• Take the children. Have the children come over for a play date.
• Go over and help. 
• Do some light cleaning.
• Get a group of friends together and pitch in to have a cleaning lady go do a good cleaning. 
• Visit. Call or go in and visit. My friend Lynette said that when she was on bed rest, one visitor a day made the time fly. And she was on bed rest for 6 months, so if she thinks so, I have to believe her!

Words of Encouragement/Advice

People shared lots of words of encouragement. Bed rest, plain and simple, sucks. It is very hard to be a woman who is accustomed to managing her home and watch it all come apart around her. No matter how awesome your husband is, your kids are, and your help is, they are all volunteers who are trying to step in when they can and fill a role you put all of your effort into all day long. No one is super-human enough to cover what they already do plus what you do. So things will slide. 

In other words, let it go. Let the cleaning go, let the "ideal" go...just realize things will not be how you want them for a while and that is okay.

Here are some encouraging words people shared:

"I remember being down because I wanted to take care of my kids and I got to the point I just wanted the baby to get here....I was so tempted to stop the meds and get up then I felt guilty for thinking it. I think everyone should know it's normal to go through this."Stephanie

Geneva said, "For me the hardest part was feeling like I was bothering people who had to help with my other child. Since Tyler is self employed he doesn't really have the option to take off a lot of work, so I had to rely on others for help.I felt very guilty about not being able to take care of my family. I think it's hard for women to be taken care of instead of being the ones taking care of others."

"You give up, no really. You have to let go what your think should be happening around you and just realize for a short time you have a new normal. Play dates for kids, take out meals and asking people to help bring dinners. I was on bedrest with my last pregnancy and had a 3 year old and 1 year old." Tiffany

Do you have advice for surviving bed rest?

If you liked this, you might also like:

Surviving Colds

Surviving Diaper Rash

Postpartum Body

source

The recent appearance of Kate Middleton willing to (gasp!) show off that she still looked like a pregnant lady shortly after delivering her baby has brought a lot of cheers, jeers, and "so-what's" -- but no matter the emotional reaction, people are talking.

For my generation, and I imagine anyone older, realizing a woman typically still looks pregnant after delivering a baby is as equally as shocking as seeing a real live newborn and realizing they look more like aliens than cute little bundles (I remember seeing the newborn of one of my best friends when I was in college and feeling a bit sorry for her that her baby looked so funny). Both of these startling facts, I believe, can be attributed to A) women previously hiding themselves from the media after delivering a baby (and who can blame them!) and B) portrayals on TV/movies of postpartum women (who are really just actors showing off their normal selves) and their cute "newborn" babies (who are really just three month olds posing as newborns). I mean, do you remember Rachel shortly after giving birth to Emma on Friends? 

4.5 years ago, I helped throw a shower for a good friend having her first baby. She ended up having the baby a few days before the shower. She still looked pregnant. A woman came who had no children yet and commented, "I thought you had your baby?!?!?" The rest of us who had children smiled knowingly--News Flash! Women still look pregnant after they deliver a baby. Most women on TV are just acting like they are pregnant. So when it is time to act like they are no longer pregnant, they look like an actress working in Hollywood.

So why do we still look pregnant? In the book Your Pregnancy & Birth by The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, it states, "Right after delivery, you will still look like you are pregnant. During pregnancy, the abdominal muscles stretched out little by little. They won't just snap back into place the minute your baby is born" (page 195).

It then goes on to say, "Give your body time to go back to normal" (page 195).

Okay wait. Anyone here have their body go back to just how it was before the baby was born? Anyone? Not me! Not for any baby I have had. You hear tales of babies changing everything from hair texture to the size of your feet. So, yes, give your body time to go back to normal, but not the old normal, the new normal.

I came to a crazy realization the other night as I sat around the campfire with my extended family and listened to my aunt talk about changes she is experiencing right now. As a female, you are born and you grow up like a "normal" person would. Then you get your menstrual cycle--aka period, Aunt Flow, the curse, surfing the crimson wave, monthly friend, on the rag, that time of the month...you get the drift. This is your new "normal." You get to enjoy this normal for 5-20ish years in most cases before you encounter a new normal with the birth of your first child.

With the birth of each child, you will spend some time figuring out what the new normal is for you. As you seek to find this new normal, you will have a vast array of hormones raging through your body, especially if you breastfeed. By the time you figure it out what normal is, you will likely have very little time to enjoy knowing yourself before the next pregnancy comes along. 

At some point, you stop birthing children and can once again enjoy 5-20 years of "normal" before you enter menopause. This is assuming you don't have hormonal issues along the way.

As women, our bodies are constantly changing. So use the word "normal" loosely when you fight to get back to it. 

I have developed some new normals after each baby. And I am honestly still figuring out my new normal after Brinley. Nursing a baby doesn't lend itself to being "normal" so I am still coming off of those hormones since she recently turned one. I have had my hair go less curly (I have naturally curly hair), and then curly again after another baby. I have had my feet change size and shape. I have gained a mole. I of course have the stretch marks all over my abdomen (each child put pressure on a different spot, so I have them all over...does it make Brinley the last child for sure since she is the only one to not give me stretch marks? That means she deserves to be the spoiled youngest right? Of course she did give me the new mole...). My menstrual cycle has changed severity and length...

This sounds very bleak, but there is a plus side. There is the new normal of being a mom. Your body did some amazing things, and changed though it is, it can be stronger! It has shown you what it is made of and what you are made of and you are better for it in every way. Your postpartum body is definitely different from what you are used to as "normal," but with every baby and every shift, you are more refined and better for it.

Index: Pregnancy/Postpartum

• 3 Reasons it is Okay to Not Like Being Pregnant
• Being Pregnant and Being a Mom
• Creative Ways To Choose the Perfect Baby Name
• Exercise and Pregnancy
• Hospital Packing List

• How To Choose An Amazing Midwife {Guest Post}

• Morning Sickness
• Pregnant and Coughing?
• Pregnancy and the Guilt
• Pregnancy News Flash: Pain is not a Requirement
• Pregnancy: Weight Gain and Eternal Perspective
• Prepping for Baby Tip: Establish Consistency
• Preparing for Baby: Establish Independence in Children
• Prepping Siblings For Baby
• Pregnancy: Think Through Abilities
• Reading While Pregnant
• Remedies for Reflux/Heartburn During Pregnancy
• *Shrug* You're Pregnant!
• Surviving Bed Rest
• Thank You to My Husband

Postpartum

• Improving Your Skin and Hair: How I got rid of my "mask of pregnancy"

• One mom's experience with postpartum depression 
• Postpartum Changes in Your Body
• Postpartum Real Life