What to Do When Your Toddler Cries at Nap Time

What to Do When Your Toddler Cries at Nap Time. Ten common reasons toddlers cry before nap time and what to do each time.

After going through all of the effort to teach your baby to sleep well, it can be unsettling and unnerving if your toddler starts to cry at nap time. 

While solving a baby's nap issues can be tricky, it is more straight forward than solving a toddler's nap issues. The older children get, the more complex and individual they become. In this post, I discuss various reasons a toddler might start crying before nap time and how to respond to each scenario. 

For this post, I am assuming your toddler has been a good sleeper in the past and was taught and expected to sleep independently already. The crying is different than how things have been in life for your toddler up to this point. 

Toddler is Crying Because of a Sleep Regression

Since you have made it this far into your parenting journey, a sleep regression is nothing new to you. You know all about sleep regressions and what they mean. This is when your toddler suddenly stops sleeping well and seemingly for no reason. If this is a literal regression, there is nothing you can do but wait it out.

At this point you should know your toddler well enough to have a good idea of how to respond and how not to respond during a sleep regression. Does your toddler need to just blow off some steam for a minute before settling down? If yes, just let her be. Does your toddler tend to do better if you go in and address her somewhat? If yes, go in.

Everything You Need To Know About Wonder Week 19

Everything You Need To Know About Wonder Week 19. What is wonder week 19, or leap 4. How to help baby through wonder week 19. What baby learns during wonder week 19 and what to expect.

It did not take long after starting this blog for me to quickly realize a common time period babies were having troubles with sleep. I got an overwhelming number of questions from worried parents about their baby's sleep all of a sudden regressing right around four months old. In fact, the first time I wrote a post on it was two months after starting this blog.

I did some polls to try to figure out why some babies would be having issues while others would not. I came up with some theories as to why problems might be happening. It wasn't until my third child was a baby that the term "Wonder Weeks" first came to my knowledge. Wonder Weeks, by Frans X. Plooij and Hetty van de Rijt, was first published in 1992, yet I hadn't heard of it until 2009. The power of the Internet and moms groups introduced it to me.

This book talks about time periods in your baby's life when your baby is developing new skills, called leaps. These periods are marked with fussiness, clingyness, crying, poor eating, and poor sleep. The Wonder Weeks tells you when to expect these leaps, what skills are being developed during the leaps, things you can do to help baby get through each leap, and how long each leap will last.

Guess when the biggest, baddest leap of all is?

Four months old. This is also known as Wonder Week 19, or Leap 4.

In this post, I am sharing everything you need to know about this wonder week leap so you can help baby get through this sleep regression as smoothly as possible.

How to Solve Sleep Problems for Toddlers and Preschoolers

How to Solve Sleep Problems for Toddlers and Preschoolers. Two simple ways to get your child taking great naps.

Almost every Monday, I do a live video on Facebook answering questions from readers. Almost every single week, I get questions about troubles with sleep, usually naps, for older babies, young toddlers, and preschoolers. I have on common set of questions for these parents.

How is the child's exercise? How is the child's mental stimulation?

If your child was sleeping well and suddenly stops sleeping well, there can be a variety of reasons for the sleep problems. There are many reasons for poor sleep. It could be a common sleep disruption all children face. You might need waketime length adjusted or it might be time for a nap to be dropped. 

By the time you have an older baby, toddler, or preschooler, you are quiet accustomed to considering all of these factors. When your toddler or preschooler does not sleep well, you know what to look for. You know to watch for waketime length, nap length, and teething signs. But do you consider exercise and stimulation?

No?

Add it to your list. Consider it from here on out.

Here is why.

Circadian Rhythm Explained and How It Impacts Sleep

Circadian Rhythm Explained and How It Impacts Sleep. How light impacts sleep.

When it comes to helping our children and ourselves get healthy sleep, there are several factors to consider and be mindful of. One such factor you will see me talk about often is the circadian rhythm.

The circadian rhythm is a sleep regulatory system. The circadian rhythm is an internal body clock. This is something within your body that helps impact your sleep patterns. Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child describes it as being something that switches on and off genes in response to light (see page 15). It is a molecular clock that is set by sunlight. The purpose of it is to ensure the body sleeps when it should and is awake when it should (along with other body factors. For the purpose of this post, we will focus on the impact it has on sleep). This sleep system is impacted genetically, so it is different from person to person (just like eye color). While it is genetic, it can be impacted by light, temperature, melatonin, and chemical reactions.

What to Do When Your Baby is Not Sleeping Through the Night

What to Do When Your Babywise Baby is Not Sleeping Through the Night

If you knew exactly when your baby would sleep through the night, you could be patient. If you knew in two weeks you would reach that magical day, you could persevere. The unknown is hard. The unknown can be soul-crushing. The unknown can make you very impatient. You don't know if you are on the right path and you just need a glimmer of hope!

You want baby sleeping through the night and you want it to happen now. 

When your baby is not sleeping through the night, you cannot solve the night wakings without figuring out why baby is waking up. Baby is not waking at night for no reason. Figuring out the why can take time and often takes experimenting, but you cannot get your baby to sleep through the night without fixing the "why" for the waking. Your first step will be figure out why, then you will fix the why. Here is a list of whys and how to address each one.

A word on addressing issues. You need to think scientific method here. You cannot take this entire list and address it all tonight. Change one thing at a time and see if that fixes it. If so, great. If not, try the next thing.

What to Do When Your Baby is Not Sleeping Through the Night

Have Patience

The first thing to do is to have patience. I get a lot of frustrated questions about 7 or 8 week olds who are not sleeping through the night. It is fully in the range of normal to be that age and not sleeping through the night, even when you use On Becoming Babywise (affiliate). It is fully normal even until 12 weeks old. 

So your first step in the process of figuring out why your baby is not sleeping through the night is figure out of if you just need more patience. I know you are tired! I know you are anxious not knowing when that magical night will come. You still have to be patient.

Analyze Feedings

When your baby gets up in the night, how does he eat? Does he eat well for the feeding in the night? 

If he eats well, how does he eat for the very first feeding of the day? If your baby eats well in the night and eats well for the first feeding of the day, your baby legitimately needs to eat in the night. Do not despair! There are things you can try if that is the case. You can add a dreamfeed if you do not have one so your baby can get an extra feeding in before your night time. You can try cluster feeding in the evening to squeeze in an extra feeding. You can also try feeding more often all day long to fit in an extra feed during daytime hours and hope baby then won't need a night feeding. For example, if you are feeding every 3-3.5 hours during the day, you can feed every 2.5 hours and work an extra feeding into the daytime.  

Those things won't always work, however, and you might need to just be patient until baby no longer needs that night feeding.

If your baby does not eat well for the first feeding of the day, then your baby probably does not need to eat at night. In this case, you can work to eliminate the night feeding and see what happens. You can cut the feeding all together, or you can slowly cut back the amount of time spent eating or total amount eaten if you are feeding with a bottle. 

Always keep in mind that growth spurts happen, so a baby who was not hungry in the night last week might be hungry in the night this week. Always be sure you feed extra for growth spurts during the daytime hours to avoid more night feedings from needing to happen.

Consider Sickness 

A sick baby will not sleep well at night. If your baby has a cold or any other sort of sickness, expect sleep to not be as solid as it would be otherwise. Once baby is done with the sickness, you can move on to try to get baby sleeping through the night, but during a sickness is not the time to fight that battle. 

Consider Pain

A baby in pain will not sleep well. Your baby might have gas pain or reflux pain going on, preventing baby from being able to sleep well and sleep solid through the night. If your baby is old, baby might be teething, causing pain. 

If you think your baby might be in pain, try remedying the pain and see how sleep goes. If it is reflux, talk to your baby's doctor about ways to help relieve the pain. Keep in mind that most reflux medication dosages are based on weight, so as your baby gets bigger, it is highly possible she will suddenly stop sleeping as well because her reflux meds are no longer enough and her pain is back.

If you suspect your baby has gas pain, try giving gas drops through the day each day. You also want to be sure you are burping thoroughly. 

If your baby is waking up from teething pain, you can give some pain meds before bedtime to help with the pain and hope it won't wake baby up at night.

Consider Habit

Some babies start out waking up for a legitimate reason, like hunger. Then they just get used to waking up at that time each day and each night and continue to do it. 

If it is habit, baby will literally wake up and just about the exact same minute each night. Baby can wake up at the same time and be hungry, so you can't assume it is habit just because it is consistent. 

If you think it might be habit, you can test it by helping baby fall back asleep without feeding baby. If baby wakes up an hour later (at the next sleep transition), you can safely assume baby really is hungry. If baby sleeps longer than an hour before waking again, there is a good chance it is habit. 

If you figure out that it definitely is habit, there are a few options before you. You can help baby fall back asleep and hope baby learns to sleep through and not wake from habit. You can try doing a wake to sleep from the Baby Whisperer. You can wait ten minutes before going in to see if baby will just resettle and go to sleep. You can also do cry it out. 

Consider Comfort

Is your baby uncomfortable in any way? When your baby transitions between sleep cycles, discomfort can lead your baby to wake up rather than drift into the next stage of sleep. A diaper being too wet or poopy can wake your baby. The room being too hot or too cold can wake your baby (see also this post on optimal temperature for sleep). Your baby not being dressed in the optimal way can make it so baby doesn't sleep well. The swaddle, or lack thereof, can wake your baby.

If your baby is uncomfortable in any way, change things up until you find the right temperature, diaper size, swaddle type, etc. for your baby to sleep well. 

Keep a Consistent Morning Waketime

I can't stress the importance of a consistent morning waketime enough. I know you are tired. I know you want to sleep in and just let baby sleep, especially if baby is waking in the early morning hours (or late hours of the night). 

You can sleep if you really want to, but know you will most likely delay baby sleeping through the night if you do so. Consistency with your first feeding of the day is the single most underrated tool for getting baby to sleep through the night. 

If your baby is waking a little too early in the morning, see this post for help.

Analyze Bedtime

Timing is key for good sleep. Timing for bedtime is important just like it is for naptime. I aim for bedtime to happen about 12 hours before I want baby waking up each morning. Keep bedtime consistent. 

If you think bedtime might be off, experiment with different bedtimes. Keep a log of what time bedtime happens so you can track if a certain time works better than another. 

Analyze Dreamfeed Time

The dreamfeed should happen between 10-11 PM for most babies. Some babies are quite sensitive and need the dreamfeed just so or they won't sleep well. I would say most babies are not hyper sensitive to the dreamfeed timing, but some are. My fourth child was so sensitive that she had a five minute window that worked. If I fed her outside of that window, she would not sleep well that night. Experiment with the timing for your dreamfeed. Go in five minute increments in case your baby is sensitive about it.

Analyze Overall Daytime Sleep

Your baby might not sleep well if daytime sleep is either too much or too little. If it is too little, your baby will be overly tired, and sleep begets sleep, so baby may not be well-rested enough to sleep well. If your baby has too many naps for her age, you might need to drop or shorten a nap to get daytime sleep in the right spot for night sleep to go well. Read my post on the Best Ages for Dropping Baby's Naps to know if it might be time for a nap change. 

Analyze Sleep Props and Self-Soothing Ability

If your baby has a sleep prop, the prop might be leading to baby waking in the night. If baby relies on a prop to fall asleep, then when he transitions at night, if the prop isn't there, he will likely wake instead of falling back asleep. It is not uncommon for babies who sleep with pacifiers to have a period of time when sleep is disrupted. At that point, parents decide between getting rid of the pacifier or pushing through. Sleep props are not always bad. Read more on when sleep props are okay and when you should avoid them. 

Another sleep prop is the inability to fall sleep independently. If your baby can't fall asleep alone, in other words, has no self-soothing ability, then baby likely will wake up in the night and need help falling back asleep. You might need to do some sleep training to get your baby to sleep through the night. One of my favorite methods for no-cry sleep training is the Four S's. If your baby is a newborn, this can work very well. 

Conclusion

Hang in there! Your baby will sleep through the night at some point. It might just happen, but you might need to put in some effort with doing some experimenting and figuring it out. Babywise is great and helpful, but even among the Babywise babies, there is a normal range that is quite large in Baby Standard Time. Even if you are baby wise, there are always outliers and extenuating circumstances, as listed above, that can interfere with night sleep happening when you hope. Go through this list. Try and see if any of them are interfering with sleep. If not, it might be time for some sleep training to get baby sleeping through the night. Your night will come. 

See Also:

• Sleep (a comprehensive list of all of the baby sleep posts on this site)
• 5-6 AM "Night" Wakings
• 10-12 Hours of Sleep
• Day/Night Confusion
• Early Morning Feedings Before Waketime
• How to Get Your Child to Sleep In Later in the Morning
• How I Got My Baby To Sleep 9 Hours by 8 Weeks Old
• Nighttime Sleep: 9-15 Weeks Old
• Nightime Sleep Issues--Revised and Updated
• Sleeping Through the Night: A Tale of Four Children
• How To Have a Good Sleeper
• 10 Reasons Your 5-8 Month Old Has Stopped Sleeping Well

The Babywise Mom Nap Guide: How to establish successful naps from birth through the preschool years

The Babywise Mom Nap Guide how to get baby to take naps

Of all of the questions I get on my Babywise Mom blog, the topic most frequently inquired of is naps. How to get baby to take a nap? Why won't baby nap? Why does baby wake up after 45 minutes? How can I get baby to sleep?

The Babywise Mom Nap Guide

Because of this, I bring to you The Babywise Mom Nap Guide: How to establish successful naps from birth through the preschool years. In this book, I disucss the following:

• Nap goals (what your goals should be for naps)
• Waketime length (common optimal waketime lengths for all ages and how to calculate it)
• Growth spurts (when they typically happen and what to do when they do)
• Short naps (how to solve those short nap issues and what to do when baby wakes early)
• Sleep totals (how much sleep your child should be getting by age, baby through teen)
• Sleep transtions (understanding what a sleep transition is and when they happen)
• Dropping naps (everything you need to know about dropping naps from baby naps on to rest time for your preschooler)
• Sleep cues (understanding sleep cues)
• Sleep routines (what to include in your sleep routine)
• Sleep regressions (when sleep regressions happen and what to do when they happen)
• Sleep props (what is a sleep prop, what isn't, and when it is okay to use a sleep prop)

You can find tons of nap information on this blog. What the book does for you is consolidate the information and put everything you need to know about naps in one place. This way you don't have to search through the entire blog and bounce around looking for the information you need.

I am selling the book for an introductory price of $9.99. You can order here and get an instant download. It is super easy! This price will go up, so get your copy now. 

How to Put Baby Back to Sleep

There come times when your little one will wake up early but not be hungry. In those moments, you really want your baby to go back to sleep. It is hard to get a baby to go back to sleep after a nice 45 minute "power nap." 

I recently wrote on what to do when your baby woke early but wasn't hungry. Several readers shared what they did. Here are 14 moms' tips on how to put a baby back to sleep after early waking from a nap. 

Natalie said:  Depends on the age - for newborn we would transfer to swing to at least make a go at a full nap! Now with an older baby (mine is 16 months), if he wakes up early I let him be. Sometimes he will cry a bit and go back to sleep, sometimes, he will wake up and roll around and play and never go back to sleep (but I still won't get him up until nap "time" is over). Use your gut instinct, however - if he wakes up screaming and is very upset, I will get him up early and assume he had a bad dream/is teething/not feeling well.

Kimberly said: For younger babies the pacifier and bouncer if they really need the sleep. For older babies I give a soft book or simple board book. A few minutes of looking at it and my little ones usually go right back to sleep.

Krista said: The swing! Anytime before about 3 months with my second if he woke early, I put him in the swing. Never to start, but if he woke early. And about 85% of the time he would go back to sleep until I woke him to start the next cycle.

Sarah said: When I put him down I lay him on his tummy, tuck his head to the side and pat his butt a couple of times. If he wakes up from a nap and stays on his tummy I ignore like I would at night. If he moves around I'll go in and "reset" the bedtime space by flipping him back, tucking his head and patting his butt and walking back out .

Christina said:  I leave a book in the corner of the crib sometimes. Or else just let my daughter self soothe back to sleep if it’s only been an hour or two. 95% of the time she will go back to sleep. Today my daughter woke a half hour early, but with molars and getting over a nasty cold, she was up for good.

Elisabeth said: I can't hear him... and he usually goes back down all by himself. Clever boy! (Sometimes he wants his back rubbed or face stroked - but not often)

Kelly said: Young baby: Rub their back and shush or gentle shake the crib. Pick up put down method. Older baby: rock for a minute until calm. CIO. And honestly if they are older I adjust the schedule for the rest of the day. Toddler: books but by toddler I expect mine to stay in bed and play with their stuffed animals until it's time for nap time to be over.

Brittney said: Swing, then that stopped working, so rocked, then that stopped working, so baby carrier, then that stopped working so I just leave him to roll around until he starts to cry then call naptime over at that point!

Jennifer said: Leave the baby in the crib for at least 15-20 min and see if baby will self soothe back to sleep.

Robin said: Nothing! My children have always fallen back to sleep on their own if left alone.

Lourens said: Dummy them again if they take the dummy 😜😜turn them on their other side, throw a light blankie over their face....wait hope and pray ☺️

Nikki said: Quiet crib time! At least they are relaxing their bodies and not being overstimulated.

Amanda said: Swing!!!

Kehly said: Any advice for when they fall asleep in the car seat and you get home, place car seat still in quiet room, and they wake?! Baby #2 and still haven't found a way around this, besides driving around forever! Can't do that with a fidgety toddler in the car!

Two Year Old Sleep Regression

You have worked your child's entire life on having consistent and healthy naps. You have survived wonder weeks and short naps. You have navigated several naps being dropped over the last couple of years. You may have thought sleep regressions would be behind you as you entered toddler-land. Enter the two year old sleep regression.

A sleep regression is when your child suddenly stops sleeping well. There can be good reasons for regressions, and there are common ages for regressions that have no explanation or cause. Sometimes treating those exact issues can help bring you back to the sleep patterns you are used to.

Here are some things to do and thing to not do when your child is having the two year old sleep regression.

Do Not Drop the Nap

I have written on what to do when your toddler refuses to take a nap. My number one thing is do not drop it. Remember there is a regression right now. Things can go back to good with some tweaks and sometimes just with some waiting it out. Keep nap time.

Do Analyze Wake Time Length

Your toddler might need a little longer waketime length before nap starts. I have a handy chart on waketime length for toddlers in this post: Optimal Waketime Lengths for Toddlers.

Do Consider Teething/Sickness
Your toddler might be having sleep troubles because of teeth coming in or because of sickness. An ear infection can cause sleep problems. A simple cold can lead to poor sleep.

Do Consider Life Changes
Your toddler might be moving into a new bed, getting a new sibling, or starting a new activity. These things can all cause sleep regressions.

Do Have Rules and Consistency
Stay consistent with sleep and with your sleep rules. Your toddler might start testing getting out of bed without permission. Respond in a way to set the stage for good sleep habits long-term.

Do Be Aware of the Environment

Is it too hot? Is it too cold? Is the sun breaking through the window? Does your toddler need a blanket? Does your toddler need a pillow? Is your child comfortable sleeping?

Remember Regressions
Remember what a sleep regression is like? Baby doesn't sleep well for no good reason? If this poor sleep is a literal regression, there is nothing you can do but wait it out.

Conclusion
When your two year old is not sleeping well, consider the list of possible factors listed above. In the end, it might just be a regression that you need to wait out. Wait it out and continue on the sleep track with your toddler. While your two year old probably won't sleep every day consistently ever again, a daily nap is still super important in your toddler's daily routine.

Read More:

What To Do When Your Child Has a Nightmare

"Mommy, will you pray for me to not have any scary dreams tonight?" Sometimes it feels like all we can do as parents when it comes to nightmares and night terrors is pray. They seem very much out of our control. While I do not in any way discount the power of prayer, there are other things we can also do to set our children up for sweet dreams instead of scary dreams. 

We have all had nightmares and know how unsettling they can be. We want to do everything we can to help our children work through the fear and get back to sleeping well. Here are some ideas on how to help your child to stop having nightmares.

1-Make Sure Your Child Has Health Sleep Habits

A huge key to avoiding nightmares is to have a regular sleep schedule. Have a regular bedtime that is early enough for your child. Get your child up at the same time each day. These sleep habits you worked so hard to establish are still helpful and vital in the toddler, preschool, and child ages. 

In these healthy sleep habits, have a regular sleep routine. Find what is calming for our child. Is a bath at night good? Have snuggle time and a bedtime story. Help your child wind down. 

See: 

Preschoolers and Bedtime, Consistent Bedtime, Bedtime, Strategies for Making Bedtime Smoother

2-Make Sure Your Child is not Too Hot or Too Cold

When Brayden was a toddler, he started having some bad dreams. This was during the summer and I had a fan in the room blowing to help keep things cooled down. My husband had a lot of bad dreams as a child, and remembered that when he was hot or had air blowing right on him, he would have bad dreams. We needed to keep it cooled, but also  not air blowing on him. So we faced the fan away from him. So analyze the temperature of the room. 

3-Do Not Allow Your Child To Watch or Read Scary Things

And judge scary by what is scary to your child. My husband was once terrified of the movie The Wizard of Oz. Just because you don't see it as scary doesn't mean your child won't see it as scary. 

4-Watch For Patterns

When your child has a nightmare, take note of the previous day's events. What time was bedtime? Is your child getting enough sleep? What was the temperature like? Did your child have some sort of stress or trauma the day before? Was there a new situation? Did your child watch something scary the day before?

Our brain processes life while we sleep. During REM sleep, your brain categorizes what it learned that day. I personally find that when I am stressed out, I have bad dreams about my stress point that night. 

You also want to watch for patterns on what and when your child ate close to bedtime. The food and you eat can impact how you sleep, and if you aren't sleeping well, it can lead to nightmares. 

5-Encourage Your Child To Talk About the Dream

When my child has a bad dream, I hold them close and have them tell me about it. This helps them process and get it all out. I don't belabor it. I don't force them if they don't want to say anything. I ask if they want to tell me about it and listen when they describe the dream. You may find it helpful to talk about it more in the daytime when things are bright. I don't brush it off and tell them it was just a dream. I do reassure them it wasn't real, it was only a dream, but I empathize without it made them feel. Hey, I have woken up angry at my husband enough times because of a dream I had the night before. I know those post-dream emotions are real.

6-Empathize With Your Child

I let my children know that I don't like it when I have a bad dream, either. I let them know that I have bad dreams sometimes too, it isn't fun, but I am okay. 

7-Find Ways To Empower Your Child

My children love to have a picture of Jesus right by their bed to help them feel safe when they are scared. They love stuffed animals. Brinley recently had a couple of weeks where we had to line her head with stuffed animals at night to help protect her brain from bad dreams. 

Sometimes a night light can help your child feel less scared. I don't like night lights in the room regularly, but I will put one in during times of need. 

Some parents find success in mixing up some glitter and water, or just water, in a squirt bottle and spraying the bed and room to send those bad dreams away.

Teach your child to think of happy things. What nice songs could she sing? What fun memories could she think about? What future event could she look forward to? The mind is a powerful thing, and if you can get it on the side of "We are okay to go to sleep," it is a huge step in the right direction.

My children turn to prayer, also. 

8-Be Wary of New Habits

I don't want to discourage you from comforting your child in any way after a bad dream. Just always be mindful that anything you do after a bad dream might need to be done every day until you break the habit. When we did the stuffed animals around the head for Brinley, we had to do that for a couple of weeks. We were able to wean off of it after some time. Just be willing to continue anything you do long-term or at least for a few weeks AND be willing to work to break that habit if you don't want it around forever. 

Conclusion

Your child will most likely have some bad dreams here and there throughout childhood. When it happens, it is normal for your child to be scared and nervous to face sleep again. These tips can help you set your child up to avoid nightmares as much as possible, help your child through the nightmare when it happens, and be able to face those nightmares and conquer them after the fact. 

Related Posts:

Sleep Regressions {Poll Results Post}

Sleep regressions really have a way of taking the wind out of your sails. You work so hard to establish healthy sleep in your baby, and then BAM! Sleep regression comes along. You wonder what you did wrong and what you should do differently. In reality, if it is a sleep regression, the answer is you did nothing wrong.

I asked you all to share your sleep regression experiences. Here are the answers.

1-Did your baby ever have a sleep regression?

Yes: 9

No: 0

2-What age(s) did your child have a sleep regression?

4 Months: 4

9/10 Months: 5

18 Months: 1

2 Years: 2

3-Was there anything you could do to help the sleep regression?

Baby Swing: 3

Practice New Skills: 3

Have super consistency: 3

Wait it out: 5

Quote from Yooli: "The number 1 thing for us was consistency. Bad naps, taking forever to fall asleep, whatever. We might tweak the schedule to get an overtired child down earlier, but we stuck to the schedule for the most part. If the kid sat in the crib and kicked the wall for an hour during nap time, fine. You still need to rest kiddo. In the middle of the night, we usually went in to comfort after waiting a few minutes, especially after the child was older and could call for us. But we never pulled the child into bed with us and we didn't cosleep with them. There were some particularly bad nights when we would have to go in there 3-4-5 times a night and finally hold the child in a chair until they were asleep or near asleep and transfer, but we would always put them back in their crib or bed, reassure them, and leave. "

4-How did you manage the schedule during the sleep regression? With your child waking early, did you feed more often, have more waketime, etc.

Consistency: 5

No changes: 3

Help baby fall back asleep: 1

5-Any tips, advice, or words of encouragement?

Ashley said: A sleep regression is something all babies must go through. It's not a reflection on you, especially if you have been consistent to this point. Regressions feel a lot longer than they actually are. I listened to a lot of crying during regressions, and sometimes I just had to take the baby and go to Target. Seriously, I bought a lot on clearance ;) That said, regressions for my family were a time to stay consistent, but also allow us the freedoms to go places and do things in order to get things done and keep the normally crying baby entertained. They are maddening, they are intense, but they are temporary. Take the good you get during regressions! Once it is over, as it will certainly reach an end, life will feel perfect and beautiful 

Julie said: Hang in there, and consider a schedule tweak!

Yooli said: I am absolutely convinced that sticking to a schedule made our kids get through and out of sleep regressions faster than most children. Neither of my boys really had that dreaded 4 month regression to the degree you hear moms lament about where they go on and on for months. 45 minute naps, crabbiness, night wakings, sure. But the HABIT of sleeping was already ingrained in them so even during regressions, they slept better than most kids and really helped their brains develop that much faster and get through those phases faster. And then when it was over, 2-3 hour naps and 12 hours overnights kicked right back in and they went right back to where they needed to be. Even now with my oldest going through the trying three's, he needs his sleep more than ever - particularly his afternoon nap! Its something that is so restorative and soothing to his moody, crabby little soul right now, even when he insists he doesn't want to nap. He might protest for a few minutes, but then goes down and goes to sleep. Why? Because its just been a part of his routine his whole life and he doesn't know any different. Its always been non-negotiable.

Carrie said:  It won't last forever--unless you start bad habits, like feeding to go back to sleep or bringing baby to your bed. Those may work, but it's really hard to stop later on. Give it a week or two to sort itself out before changing up anything big time. It might be a leap or light shining through a window. It could be a schedule problem, but be patient and let your baby work it out.

How to Deal with the 45-Minute Intruder

The 45-minute intruder is when your baby wakes up 45 minutes into the nap. The 45-minute intruder can be quite stressful for you as a parent. This is true whether your child has always been a 45-minute napper or if your child suddenly started taking short naps at some point. Here are some tips for dealing with the 45-minute intruder.

1-Try to Figure Out "Why"

The first thing to do is to try to figure out why your child is waking after 45 minutes. Knowing why will allow you to address it appropriately. Unfortunately, figuring out why usually involves a lot of trial and error.

The first thing to consider is a growth spurt. You always want to to treat it like a growth spurt first. You want to feed baby when hungry, so make sure baby isn't hungry before you try other solutions. Growth spurts happen every 3-4 weeks usually, so it is frequently!

If it isn't hunger, I always consider sickness, pain, or teething next. Trying to address sound or light when it is a sickness or pain will get you know where but feeling guilty when you figure it out. Make it a habit to always consider the possibility of pain or sickness right after you consider hunger. 

Another common reason for a baby waking early from a nap is being overly tired. You want to make sure you get that waketime length right. Know your baby's Optimal Waketime Lengths. And realize that what is optimal at 14 weeks will be different from what was optimal at 10 weeks. This is a constantly moving target. Babies keep you on your toes for...ever basically :). Read up on  The Cornerstone for Good Naps for help on how to get that waketime length right, complete with a nice infographic.

Other common reasons for waking early include learning a new skill, wonder weeks, light, and noise. See a comprehensive list of reasons and what to do about it in my Troubleshooting Naps post.

2-Know the Sleep Hierarchy

I have sleep hierarchy for different ages. I have different rules I apply based on age. Read more here:

• My Sleep Hierarchy For Newborns

• Sleep Hierarchy: 3-6 Months

• Sleep Hierarchy: 6-9 Months

3-Honestly Look at Your Baby's Self-Soothing Ability

All babies transition at right about 45 minutes into a nap. If your baby can't put him or herself to sleep alone, then there is a good chance baby will wake from that nap fully at 45 minutes rather than settling back down into sleep for another cycle. For more information, read

What is a Sleep Transition (and How Does It Impact Naps.

If your baby uses some sort of prop to fall asleep, there is a good chance you will encounter a run with the 45-minute intruder. If your baby can't fall asleep alone, your baby will need your help at that 45-minute mark. This is the time to consider, is it the pacifier? Is it the rocking baby to sleep? Honestly look at your sleep routine and decide if you want to continue it or if you want to try to remove props. People go both ways. 

4-Give Baby Time To Go Back To Sleep

When Kaitlyn (my second child) was a baby, I remember one day she woke early and Brayden was in the tub. I got him out as quickly as I could, dried him off, and got him dressed. From the time she started to cry to the time I had him out and ready, it had been ten minutes. And she was done crying and back asleep. That experience along with the years since in having other children besides the baby, have taught me that sometimes if you wait 10-15 minutes, the baby will just go back to sleep. So I make it a policy that if baby sounds okay (and you do get used to knowing what is okay and what isn't), I let the baby cry for 10 minutes before I get baby. Don't reply to every sound. You can create a 45 minute waking habit if you respond every time your baby makes a peep.

5-Know You Will Make Mistakes

You are human. You are learning. You will get waketime lengths wrong. You will overstimulate your baby. You will dress your baby to warm or not warm enough. You are going to make mistakes along the way. You won't ruin your baby for life. So know mistakes are inevitable and don't beat yourself up about it. 

6-Accept and Don't Stress. Don't Take It Personally

There are some babies who are 45 minute sleepers. My oldest was quite consistent at the 45 minute nap until he was about 6.5 months old. The best thing to do if you are in a chronic short sleep situation is to accept that it is what it is (while still troubleshooting) and don't take it personally. See Chronic 45 Minute Naps for more. 

Click on the image to read more:

What To Do When Your Baby Wakes Early But Isn't Hungry

You know the moment. Your baby wakes up early from nap. You go check on her and try to feed her, but she isn't hungry. You check for a dirty diaper. All clear. You check to see if she is sick or has some teeth growing in. Nope. She woke up for some reason, but it isn't a reason you can identify and fix. She is awake, but not hungry...what do you do? How do you get her back on track so you can have her eating and sleeping at her regular times?

There is a simple hack for you to try in these moments. It goes like this.

1-Get her out of bed.

This is self-explanatory. Get baby out of bed. Take the swaddle off if she is still swadddled. Get her up as though it was time to get up. 

2-Spend some time playing with her. 

The length of time playing will vary based on her age, but go for about 10-20 minutes. Maybe 30 if your baby is older than 6 months old. Do watch for sleep cues and if you see a sleep cue your child typically displays, go straight to step three no matter how long it has been.

As you do this play time, keep it calm. The goal is that baby will go back down for a nap very soon, so you don't want to be tickling or getting all wild. Keep it calm.

3-Do your sleep routine.

After your playtime is up, go back to baby's room and do your sleep routine. Do the full thing. 

4-Put baby back to bed.

Put her in her bed as though it is nap time. 

This is a great hack to get baby past a short nap. This is not the first thing I would turn to when baby wakes early. The first thing I would try would be to get baby to fall back asleep as quickly as possible. That doesn't always work, however, and this hack might work to help your baby get an extra 30-45 minute nap and stay on track for the day. 

For more help with short naps, see: 

• Chronic 45 Minute Naps 

• Common Reasons for Poor Sleep

• 45 Minute Intruder
• Dealing with the 45 Minute Intruder
• How To Calculate Waketime Length

• How Pacifiers Might Be Ruining Your Baby's Sleep

• Naps: Troubleshooting--Revised and Updated
• Playing in the Crib/Bed 
• Problem Solving Tip: What Has Changed?
• Sleep Deficit
• Waking After Only 20 Minutes 
• Waking Early From Naps/Won't Fall Asleep For Naps
• What To Do When Your Baby Is Taking Short Naps

• What to Do When Your Toddler Refuses to Take a Nap